Off to discover the abusive past

by Bryan 20 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Bryan

  I?m off to Los Angeles tomorrow. I think I found my grandfather.

  As most of you know, I grew up without half my family, thanks to my jw father. My grandfather (maternal) was an abusive alcoholic, WWII, Cherokee Indian Veteran.

  I talked to my last great aunt last night for the first time. She said it was VERY common for my mother and her sister to be beaten by their drunken father.

  She also told me of physical abuse my mother said she suffered at the hands of my jw elder father. This will be explored later.

  Having found my mother seven years ago, I had decided not to locate my grandfather, who?s name I bear. No one has spoken to him in about 20 years. Today though I feel I need to speak to him and hear a story before he passes on.

  I have found his home, still in his name, but no phone. It's a bit of a cold run.

  I had so much stolen from me for decades, I want to learn as much as I can. Maybe he?ll have some old letters or photos to share with me. Who know?s. I?ll be there for a week.

  Wish me sanity.

  Bryan

  Have You Seen My Mother
• 

  bikerchic

  Wish me sanity.

  I wish you that and more!

  I hope this helps you put closure on all the abuse and the past. Live for the moment, build a better future for your children. That's how we end the cycle of abuse.

  ((((Bryan))))
• 

  cruzanheart

  How exciting! You're on a treasure hunt, Bryan, and I hope you find what you need.

  You have a PM.

  Nina
• 

  Fleur

  Good luck, Bryan. Wishing you peace, and the answers that you seek.

  hugs

  essie
• 

  Mulan

  I had so much stolen from me for decades, I want to learn as much as I can. Maybe he?ll have some old letters or photos to share with me. Who know?s. I?ll be there for a week.

  This can be a wonderful thing. I wish you well. To me, there is nothing as wonderful as seeing old photos and reading really old letters.

  From personal experience, I know of several men, who were abusive when they were younger, and turned out to be completely different people when they got old.

  I am so happy you are giving this a chance.
• 

  Special K

  I wish you well on this finding journey. Always keep a mental safety net with you just in case.

  I'm rooting for you.

  Special K
• 

  Valis

  Good luck Bryan! ..I can see him driving down Sunset in a convertible...

  Sincerely,

  District Overbeer
• 

  Bryan

  I can see him driving down Sunset in a convertible...

  Ha, ha. Actually, I just got a call from my agent. I just got booked on a TV movie of the wek about Elvis Presley. I'm playing Judge Friedman. Very small roll, but I got booked on my first audition here in swampy land!

  Thanks everyone for you well wishes. I'm aslo going to see three different grave sites. ONe of them, my mother's mother, who died 8 days after my birth will get fresh flowers.

  Thanks,

  Bryan

  Have You Seen My Mother
• 

  JustTickledPink

  wishing you well. Some of it may be true, but then again, some of it might be trumped up lies.

  I just finally reconciled with my father after 30 years. My JW mother moved me far away and did not allow me to have contact, of course she reported how he was a raving drunk, abusive, etc.... but then he came for a visit and turned out he only drank socially, was very polite, works hard, saves money, treated me and my husband very nicely and I enjoyed his company. He remembers it all so differently, he says my mother left him, once she converted to JW because she wanted to marry a JW brother. There were no other people who remembered him being an alcoholic or abusive.

  So, good luck on your trip and your discovery.
• 

  Bryan

  I know what you mean Pink.

  When I was about 8 my father told me my mother was demonized.

  When I was 14 I told him I wanted to find her.

  "Don't you think if she wanted you, she would have already found you." He told me. Making me think she didn't care about me.

  I now have a letter dated July 1972 of her begging my father to let her see me. Or at least send me a picture of herself. That was one year before she gave up and attempted suicide.

  Bryan

  Have You Seen My Mother