Missed oppourtunities as a JW kid?

by kwintestal 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • kwintestal
    kwintestal

    JW kids are repressed in every aspect of their lives, creatively, intellectually, atheletically...the list goes on.

    What did you love to do as a kid, yet weren't permitted to do?

    I personally loved football as a kid. Other JW kids and I would play every weekend until the subject was brought up at an assembly as being competitive. My parents told me that if I joined the school football team I couldn't live at home. Therefore, I took up smoking instead, at least I could do that secretly and start my rebellion undercover.

    Kwin

  • Soledad
    Soledad

    I also started secretly smoking at 14 to get back at my mother for not letting me join the softball team. I joined the team anyway and I smoked.

  • karategirl
    karategirl

    I was a straight A student and graduated in the top ten of my class. never was allowed to participate in academic clubs or competitions. It pissed me off a lot. Then of course I was told not to go to college, even though I was selected to participate in the Duke University program that follows students from middle school on to see if they have potential to go there. Hell my stepdad wouldn't even look at my report card because he said that I only showed it too him to be boastful and because I felt superior. He only wanted to see it if I was failing. Which he would have then spanked me. The sense in that reasoning? Took me until I was 25 to go back to school.

    I also was asked to join the cheerleading squad and the school newspaper. Neither of which was allowed. Joined drama, wrote a comedy which I was the director and lead part. Wasn't allowed to attend or perform since it would make me miss the meeting.

    My daughter participates in everything now. I even coach her Drill Team squad. I do whatever it takes to pay for her to be in extracurricular activities even in the summertime.

  • Mulan
    Mulan

    I grew up as a JW kid, but in different times. Many of my JW friends, were cheerleaders, class officers, athletes and more. I participated in many school activities and was the DECA historian when I was a senior. I dated too, worldly guys!! None of those things dissuaded me from being a JW. Maybe the dubs are missing something with their restrictions.

    I also was always on the Christmas committee and decorated the tree at my high school with my friends, planned Christmas and other holiday parties too. I was the one who went around to all the classes to talk about the candidates for Prom Queen, and took the votes and tallied them. I had a great time as a kid, and really didn't feel like I was missing out.

    As I said it was different times................the 50's and early 60's.

    Other things, doctrinal, are what made me wake up to the truth.

  • franklin J
    franklin J

    ahhh...Kwintestal, your post brought many sad memories back to me....especially since I have a teenage daughter entering High school. She is a stable; socially active, National Honor Society student; and very well adjusted. Very Unlike me as a teenager.

    Because my father was an elder; both older sisters were pioneers; I was "expected" to follow those examples.

    I was not permitted any worldly friends. Any after school activities ( such as sports or any intramural work) were actively discouraged . It was arranged that I would go out in service after school. I became a full time pioneer. That was all there was for me. And being a very "goody two shoe" kid; I complied

    When I think of the fun and scholastic opportunities that I missed out on in high school it makes me take a deep breath ; and shake my head....what a waste ....At least I have the secure knowledge that my kids are not growing up like that.....

    I am lucky to have rebuilt my life.....

    Frank

  • Special K
    Special K

    I don't know kwin. I think it would be quite hard to conceal.. smokin' a football. Hmm?

    But I do know what you're talking about.

    I loved to dance and play basketball and baseball but as a J.W. kid I wasn't allowed to school dances and not allowed on sports teams. .. GRRR!!!!. My husband and I took up ballroom dancing right after we were disfellowshipped. It was GREAT! and it kept us having some fun together every week and we gradually met some new friends and then went to local dances in our area.

    Special K

  • JustTickledPink
    JustTickledPink

    I was only in school from 2nd - 5th grade at which time I was yanked out of school and home schooled. Which involved basically me fending for myself in academics and being given "bible reading assignments" to prepare me for my future as a missionary or Bethalite. I was never allowed to read books, go to the library, we didn't have a TV for years - when we got one I was only allowed to watch the news or news related shows like 20/20.

    I missed out on lots of friendships with peers, and started pioneering at 11 yoa. I was the kid with the older sisters driving around witnessing all d*mn day instead of being in school learning about history, math, and science.

    But I got my GED when I was all grown up and started taking college classes and that opened up a WHOLE NEW WORLD FOR ME!!!!

    So, I think the biggest thing I missed out on was just basic knowledge and having interactions with peers.

  • new light
    new light
    I missed out on lots of friendships with peers, and started pioneering at 11 yoa.

    Wow, that is so sad, JTP! You probably got a lot of pats on the back as a kid, and probably a few assembly parts, but those don't matter now, do they? Good for you, overcoming such a sheltered childhood. All the best for your continuing journey.

    Oh, the missed opportunities. I gave up on school in 7th grade, because I thought God would be mad at me if I shot for higher education. "A Badger's Tale" really resonated with me on the note of being a gifted child that was not allowed to flourish. Standardized testing always placed me at the 97-99th percentile nationwide. I took classes with older kids in elementary school because the ones at my grade level were too easy. I was always #1 in my class until I decided not to give a shit in junior high. My best friend in elementary school (#2 in the class) went on to MIT, so who knows where I could have ended up given a remotely normal upbringing. Oh, yeah, I loved sports (especially football) and girls, but I was too much of a wuss (loyal JW) to ever take a stand. What a fucking waste.

  • whyamihere
    whyamihere

    I guess I missed alot....however I lead a pretty normal life until I started to get pressured into getting baptized.

    As for my kids I will let them do anything they want in school and after school. I think it helps them! Having all these positive actives they are likely to succeed in life. Plus I think it gives them alot of self confidence which everyone needs no matter at what age.

    Brooke WI

  • heart2heart
    heart2heart

    I wasn't raised a JW so I was able to play in soccer leagues, softball teams, go to basketball camp, be in the school musical/play which required many hours of after school rehearsals and performances.... I'm glad I didn't miss out on that opportunity. However, when I started studying at 15, I was told that sports were a no-no because of the competetiveness (which played on my feelings that I had noticed this.... not really a problem though, only natural!). I bought it, and didn't play softball that summer (or afterwards), didn't try out for the musical starting that year, didn't do any extracurricular activities in high school.... how I wish I could have those years back! Being very shy, and finding it hard to make friends, I really needed that social outlet, and a chance to break out of my shell a little .

    Special K, Kwin says "don't get any ideas into Mrs. Kwin's head!" lol poor guy has two left feet! hey, maybe I could use that to my advantage - we need to take classes so he can learn to dance! lol

    2

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