Encouraged NOT to have kids (page 2)

gerbils

I attended the recent assembly day where it was announced that 'we should cast off every unnecessary burden' in order to advance spiritually...including our non believing family and friends!!! terrible

Balsam

My then JW husband didn't want to go against the wonder WTS advice to not have children. So we didn't have any children the first 13 years of our marriage. The only reason we had any children at all as I got pregnant accidently when I was 32. Otherwise we had not intention of ever having any children ever. The end was near. By that time I didn't care one way or another by then. I was shocked to find myself pregnant.

Anyway we went on to have another son after the first and then a 3rd son again by accident. I had my tubes tied after that because I was just getting too old at 37 to keep getting pregnant. So we ended up with three sons, back in the 1980's. My ex-husband and the father of my kids was 41 the day the youngest one was born.

Had it not been for this teaching of the WTS discouraging having children we would have tried to have children back when we were newly married. We became JW right after our marriage.

I knew of one couple who pioneered most of their lives and then at 43 the wife got pregnant and had a son. They were so freaked out at having a kid after not plaining on every having any. The boy is now 19 or so.

The JW constantly looking for the end the next months or years, really is a problem of the WTS teachings. I know many older folks who never had any children including my ex-sister in law who pioneered continueously after high school, didn't marry until she was 42. No children in her life ever because she is waiting till the new system. Lots of JW's put living on hold till the new system.

heathen

That is sad Balsam . True love is hard to find so perhaps she found her true love late in life . We know the WTBTS does not take care of their people in times of need so what's wrong with 2 people who care for each other ? I've heard way too many stories of people dying old and lonely and I think that is just plain sad . I think they just need to get off peoples back with these type of regulations .

happyout

Aha, so I'm not crazy! My family insists that I must have taken it wrong, or mis-heard, that the society has never discouraged having kids. Of course, my family also says the society never discouraged witnesses against pursuing a higher education.

As a matter of fact, the very last assembly I ever attended, they were even discouraging getting married, saying you should concentrate on doing God's work. I can't remember the scripture, but it was something about not concerning yourself with the things of the world. So many reasons I had to get the hell out of there!

Happyout

JustTickledPink

You're not crazy, they explicitly talked against getting an education, calling the "wisdom of the world" lesser than the wisdom of God. I don't have the quotes, but I'm sure someone can find them. I don't know anyone that was my age that went to college, except maybe to get a certificate like an electricians certificate or medical transcriptionist... but never a 4-6 year degree. NO WAY... you might grow a brain and leave.

Balsam

Lots of older folks who never had children in the JW's. The ones who did have children have ended up alone because the children want nothing to do with the JW religion. So they condemn their children feeling Jehovah will destroy them and they won't even talk to them. I knew several older couples with grown children who left the witnesses.

I know for my I left my childrens father after 31 years of marriage and divorced him. Well he was terrified I would cause the boys to turn against Jehovah. I didn't have too, he did that for me by his unrelenting pressure to try to keep them in. My oldest son now 21 is out, and the 17 year old is out too. He is suppose to be living with his Dad and new Step-mom, but he won't. He lives with his brother till he finishes high school. I support him.

Now my boys Dad views them as dead, and are going to be destroyed when the end comes. So he and his wife have nothing to do with either of them. Real love isn't it.

When my ex-husband is an old man, and he is reaping what he has sown, his boys will not care for him or visit him. He will die alone and rejected. I suspect even the congregation won't visit him. Of course if his wife stays with him she might care for him. Time will tell.

Me, I have my sons and thank goodness I woke up and made it easier for them to leave. I and my oldest son are disfellowshipped. The youngest one is trying to fade.

The WTS back when I became a JW in 1972 was strongly encouraging singleness and if married no children. Most of the people my age in our 50's now delayed many years in having kids. We didn't want to be viewed as weak.

And college education was a complete no no. You were really looked down on if you went to college.

My ex-sister in law went to college at 32 to become a dental hygentist and graduated, quit pioneering to do so. She got married at 42 because she was tired of being alone. She was depressed all the time. But having children is something she said she would never do because the end is coming. I feel sorry for her, because she didn't marry for love but only for companionship.

The JW ways screwed up much of my youth and wasted my intelligence because of discouraging higher education.

But I now have a wonderful and loving husband who has never been a JW and life is good and joyful

Balsam

heathen

Interesting stuff Balsam . So in contradiction to what was posted by drwtsn38 and the WTBTS belief that children will turn their parents in to be killed ( which may have happened say in hitlers germany or moslem nations ) parents are condemning their children to death at armageddon and denying them the opportunity for a normal relationship . I think that's pretty sick .

Reefton Jack

Balsam's comments remind me of a magazine article early in 1973 entitled "Making a Success of Singleness."

We were all supposed to put off getting married, and go pioneering instead - after all, the end was coming in 1975, wasn't it!

Yes - the Society DID strongly discourage getting married / having children, and going to university (I was stopped from going to university by an elder. I also allowed the same bright boy to talk me into abandoning my apprenticeship 12 months later - yeah, the end was coming in 1975 all-right!)

avishai

They really frown on fertility treatments.

Ironically, they frown just as much on sterilization

kwintestal

They really frown on fertility treatments.
Ironically, they frown just as much on sterilization

New light will frown on sex for any purpose other then pro-creation.

Kwin

Encouraged NOT to have kids

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