Welcome, AloneinOH. I feel bad for what you are going through, though I did not experience this myself. I was never a JW, I married one instead. I think it is a wonderful idea to start opening up to your wife and explain the pain and insecurities you have borne alone all these years. She sounds like a loving and understanding woman, and I am guessing she will be grateful that you are sharing this bit of your heart, the painful bit, with her. I predict your bond will be stronger for it.
My dad carried a terrible burden all my growing up years, which made him more stern, brooding. Only the past few years did he share his pain with his new wife, and through her, did I find out what it was that weighed my dad down. My dad was molested when he was a boy. He stills tries to carry that memory alone, and I would say that is the most foolish thing he has done his whole life. AloneinOH, you are making great strides by talking about your betrayal.
I would put off telling your parents, though. I don't think it would have much effect on them other than to cause them pain. Let them have their last few delusional years.