I am a newbie....

sistaintheback

I posted here a couple of months ago when the site had a little different format. There was an area for newbies with concerns and that's where I lurked. I have been in the "truth" for about 30 years. I am 36. I am in the process of fading away. All of my immediate family are very strong in the organization. So, I am getting alot of encouragement from every direction to not forget HOW GOOD JEHOVAH HAS BEEN TO ME. Yes, the guilt tripping. I have been through alot of personal adversities and I have felt that Jehovah has been there for me. I prayed constantly and I did feel in my heart that he heard my prayers and comforted me many times. With the recent Tsunami, my JW family is saying..."Lawd have mercy, don't you see, honey chile, how close the end of the system is?" (Honestly, I'm thinking about waiting around a few more months in case Armageddon does strike, I want to still be in!!!:) (giggle) My husband and I are actually moving to another city in a few months to make our fading away a little easier. I am sobbing and crying all of the time, I think that I am going to miss being a JW, but I know in my heart that I'm no longer feelin' it. Of course, you all know the scary things we are told about apostates. And, I have to admit, I feel very nervous and a little creeped out knowing that you all are apostates. The fact that I am posting here, does that make me one too?

MonkeyPrincess

hi sista, welcome.
I think alot of us here have been in the same boat as you are, guilt is one of the worst weapons used against us.
you are not a bad person for asking questions or seeking knowledge. You are allowed to serve Jehovah or any
god you want to without belonging to an organisation. It has taken me a long time to realise that. We are not bad
people on this site, we are able to relate to eachother..thats all. The word apostate is merley a label. You are
very strong and you need to do what is right for you, not anyone else. Good luck in your move and your fade,
i know how difficult it is to have your family still in. ((((hugs))))

kitties_and_horses_oh_my!

Dear Sista,

I'm glad you're here. I felt weird here at first, too - my gosh, Jehovah is going to strike me with lightening or at least the elders are going to find out somehow! hehe No, but seriously, I know it is so so hard to be leaving, esp. with so little support. All I can say is this: do not stop learning. Do not stop reading. Search. The Witnesses encourage this, right? Searching is not a bad thing. Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise.

Love much,

Kitties

prophecor

Hi sistaindaback, why don't you come up to the front as you'll have a much clearer picture of what's going on? I know it must feel a little hairy when you first come in from outta' da cold, put if you sit down long enough, you'll find that jus' like in any cold place, with enough energy we all can get a little toasty 2gether

It takes a minute or 2 for the heater 2 to warm up, but sit back and watch what happens, in no time, you'll feel like you've always lived here.

Truly though, you will find so many people here, much like yourself who are in various stages of either leaving or even just considering leaving, everyone here is not DA'd or DF'd, many who travel here continue to go to the KH, and just like you, they're all looking 4 answers.

I hope that you will look around that you might come to find, that contrary to popular opinion, there are some truly wonderful people here and they truly look to share with you maybe even for the first time, true love, compassion, acceptance and dammit, some of just like to have a good time.

Wishing you well and a speedy recovery.

bikerchic

Welcome Sista!

And, I have to admit, I feel very nervous and a little creeped out knowing that you all are apostates. The fact that I am posting here, does that make me one too?

Yeah I felt the same way when I first came here waaaaay long time ago. Stick around and I suggest reading the Archived material on the Watchtower Society,as well as Quotes site for some great reading and by all means get Crisis of Conscious and read it.

I think it's a good thing you and hubby are moving it will make fading a whole lot easier believe me. Just don't give out your phone number, email or physical address to any JW before you move!

Enjoy it here!

Kate

gespro

Welcome Sista!!!!

We've got all types of folks going through various stages up in heah.

I was born into the cult and the last five years I've learned that it's far from the 'truth'.

May your personal journey be without the pains some of us have seen...

gespro

Country_Woman

welcome Sista

It will take a while - but once you are used to be here and without the negative infuence of the JW's you will enjoy your freedom. (your time and your mind)

Don't take anything for granted yet, do search for the TRUTH (the real one this time - which you have to discover for yourself)

under74

Hi sista, Thanks for sharing your story. A lot of people here relate.

Hope to see more posts from you soon.

Golf

seeitallclearlynow

Welcome sistaintheback!! I'm so glad you've spoken up and joined us! Apostate only means leaving, abandoning a former belief, etc. So although I felt the same way (about the word actually, not the people!), I'm glad you got past that worry enough to ask about it at least.

You have to leave something when you just can't believe anymore, so again, welcome to the forum!

I am a newbie....

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