We had a dear older couple, who were new to the religion. They had been professional musicians and owned a music store, and taught musical instruments, which has nothing to do with this except to set the stage, that they were "worldly" in their backgrounds. The husband, who was about 75 gave his first student talk on Ruth. Close to the beginning he lost his place and used an expletive that silenced the room. No one said a thing, and he continued on...................I wondered "did he really say that?" He did. It was the "f" word.
No one ever mentioned it later or talked about it, as though it hadn't been said. Dave was school overseer and he confirmed it to me, when I asked.
They were wonderful people and got us really good seats for the shows we wanted to go to. Front row for several Neil Diamond concerts. She would call me to tell me he was coming and "how many seats do you want?" They were a ticket outlet too.
The only comment I ever remember my father giving at a meeting was studying the Family book. Answering on how to care for and nurture your family, my father said you should neuter your children.
My mom gets tears in her eyes to this day remembering that comment. It was funnier because he didn't realize his mistake.
One elder was so stressed he kept passing out in the middle of talks, one time he even fell down before he got from his chair to the platform. Eventually he had to step down.
There was also the time the PO's son in law got caught nailing another MS wife. That was very embarrassing since everyone knew about it.
Recently, this 'most selfrighteous ex-alcoholic' elder was stripped of his privileges publicly because it came out in the open that, although he knew his sneaky pioneering daughter was having sex prior to marrying this young recently baptized young brother, he still covered it all up and gave her a full beautiful KH wedding with all the lavish trimmings.
At our hall they would often play tape recorded answers from people who were home ill. Usually the older ones who just read the answer straight out of what ever interesting magazine/book we happened to be studying.
This one lady was giving her answer and farted on the tape and then said...ooops excuse me.
Once this sister who was a tad on the heavy side went up to give a talk and when she sat down the chair broke. She was pretty embarassed, but went ahead with her talk anyway. What a trooper.
Or how about my daughter that was goofing off and broke a vase in the front of the hall -- man was I pissed. But my dad was the PO and he "took care of it". My daughter who was about 5 years old still remembers that incident -- and laughs about it now (she is a teenager).
Like most congregations something funny or embarrassing happens. When I was about 16 years old this occoured. I had a student talk and my householder was my dear friend. She had a twin sister too. They were hilarious. I told Chris not to make me laugh during my talk and what does she do, she lost her place and started la ughing and laughing. So quickly I had to interject and allow her to get her composure. In the mean time I am trying so hard not to laugh. But I was giggling in side my tummy and had a smurk or two on my face.. Have you ever had a talk on the holy temple and the foundation corner stone and the 12 apostles and try not laughing. When we finished I looked at her and then the two of us started laughing all the way to our seats . My father was the Congregation Book Servant on the Committee (before elder arrangement.) Let me tell you he was in no way amused, and I got the lecture of a life time.
The twins were assingned a student talk and one of them was the householder, Wow I just laughed because I knew the second they got on the platform there would be no talk. The two of them just sat there for five minutes laughing at each other and tears streaming down their faces. When the shcool ministeral servant stopped them he said what can I say. The whole congregation laughed and laughed. I think their dear mother was so embarrassed. We didn't let them live it down for a long time. Its really hard when your teenagers and you are close friends and then on the platform you try to be serious. It was real hard for us because we were inseperable friends.
One other time I was down in the washroom with another sister, she was a little older then me. Anyway I was talking to her as I was washing my hands and her purse feel on the floor. A box of crayola crayons feel on the counter. I picked it up to give her but I opened them and inside were cigarettes. She grabbed them from me and said they weren't hers but a friends at school. I could sense her fear and the expression on her face was worth a thousand dollars. She begged me not to tell her parents, so I didn't. On the way home from the meeting my father noticed I was unusally quiet. He asked me what was wrong and I told him nothing is wrong. Well we got home and after my sisters went to bed I told my father what had happened at the hall. Now I wasn't trying to be agoody two shoes, but really quite concerned that they the smokes belonged to the sister. My father said leave it with him. Yes I tell you that at the next meeting the sister came up to me and said some not to nice things and said we could never ever be friends. She said I betrayed her. But I didn't feel that way as I was only trying to help her because I knew in my heart that the smokes were hers. I wasn't wrong as she did confess to her parents that the smokes were hers. Many many years passed by and I saw her again at an assembly and she came to me and thanked me for having told on her as she said it made her aware that her spirituality was wavering and I indeed helped her. Wow wasn't I suprised.
We had a sister tuck her skirt into her pantyhose and walk down the middle isle to her front row seat and sit down (we had metal chairs then) and feel the cold on her bare bottom, well pantyhose. She said she started to tear up and if anyone had even cracked a tee-hee she would have run out and never come back.
