I would tell her to get bent and then go find some nice worldly girl.
Sincerely,
District Overbeer
if gf throws an ultimatum, what should one do? scary question........
by Buck 32 Replies latest jw friends
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xjw_b12
LIe to her and tell her you'll get baptized after marirage.
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Buck
well the unanimous decision here would be to run. I can see everyone's point. I have thought about it. Love may not conquer all, but I had hoped it would. I have feelings so strong for this girl. And no, Iam not some love sick teenager. I guess Ive reached a fork in the road. Iam not sure which direction. The thought of giving another year or 2 of my life for somebody is almost unthinkable. Especially the whole getting to know stage. Ahhhh.....
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Valis
Hey Buck, how old are you man? I would imagine you are relatively young, so I would say to you get out and experiment with all kinds of girls before you let one start making life descisions for you. There's plenty of chickies out there and IMO plenty that won't or wouldn't lay down ultimatums like that. Go find one and be happy.
Sincerely,
District Overbeer
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ColdRedRain
Tell her if she really loved you, she wouldn't put religion before a relationship. Also say that the religion turns people into unloving, judgemental beasts that would treat people in a second class manner and you want to have nothing like that in a future with you and her.
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frenchbabyface
Ultimatum ??? ... only one question to answer : are you ready ? and here particularly for a "menage a trois" (the 3rd one is a bunch of Elders and a Governing Body ( yeah even literally) who will have much much much weight than you in your union even in bed go figure ! without even being there (it's magic) ... unless she understands your natural (= you can't escapte it) need to follow your heart on the matter ...
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Poztate
- Take the religion, and spend your life and forcing your personality in to a mold that does not fit. Take that route, and I predict misery within five years.
- Don't take the religion, call your girlfriend's bluff, and risk losing her. She leaves you. You have a nice long cry about it in your beer. She has a nice long cry about it with her girlfriends. She risks remaining a spinster, or picking a pale pimply-faced baptized elder's son for her life-partner. You might just recover and find someone whose interests are more in line with yours.
- Don't take the religion, call your girlfriend's bluff, she caves. Live in sin. She gets disfellowshipped. Her parents won't talk to you. She has a good cry over losing her family. None her family attend your wedding. You live a moderately happy life together.
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hillbilly
Trust me......... The JW part of the equation (for you) isnt worth anything. The cult's demands alone are more burden than the worth of a "conditional" marriage.
Take all the advice given here........... if she wont get out you should run. YOUR free will isnt worth it!
~Hill
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William Penwell
I have been single now for about 10 years. I have had opportunities to get remarried many times but after the first mistake I want to learn from my mistakes and not rush into anything. I have had some woman that right away want to change me into their image and that is when I run the other way. Life is too short to be in an unhappy relationship. I would rather be happy alone than unhappy and in a relationship.
After 10 years I think I have finally found someone that is intelligent, fun to be with and accepts me for who I am. We are never going to agree on everything and there are things that have to be worked out but the key is that she accepts me for who I am and visa versa.
I take it that you are a person in your 20's??. You have a whole life ahead of you. Don't jump for the first person that you meet, especially when there are already conditions being made on your relationship. Take your time, objectively look at all your alternatives and then make your mind up. Believe me if you change for her you will regret it for the rest of your life. I am speaking here from my own experience.
Will
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darkuncle29
I find that the more pressure is being put on me to "comply", the stronger my resistance gets, unless I decide that doing what is desired of me, is not harmful or long term detrimental for me. Otherwise, never give up.
Relationship wise, this is one of the first things that will set off my alarms. I don't take kindly to people trying to mold me to make me better or more acceptable for them.
Ofcourse, I'm still single, and a freak, so I could be wrong.