How many "real friends" did you have in your congregation?

by JH 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • JH
    JH

    Most congregations have about 80 to 120 people. Out of that, how many could you consider being a "real friends"?

    Personally, not one of them was a "real friend". They were more like colleagues, nothing more.

    The word "brother or sister" should mean even closer than friends, but although I called them "brother or sister", I didn't consider them "real friends".

    What's your definition of a "real friend", and did you have any at the hall?

  • Doubtfully Yours
    Doubtfully Yours

    Now that I'm so-called 'spiritually weak' all of the ones I thought my real friends are now the 'hi & bye' type. I'm considered bad association, although I've never told them anything to indicate such. Just based on the fact that I miss many meetings and that my service time has gone way down.

    So, as it turns out, I really had no friends as I thought. Their friendship was conditional to my worship in good standing.

    DY

  • Doubtfully Yours
    Doubtfully Yours

    FARGING BASTAGES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    DY

  • jws
    jws

    I made 2 real friends in the congregation I was in as a teenager. One of them I just kind of lost touch with as we saw each other less frequently after moving to another hall and him getting married. The other one was disfellowshipped, then it was decided he wasn't because he wasn't baptised. Throughout it all, we remained friends and I'm still friends with him today. We both live 1000+ miles from where we grew up, but still live only 15 minutes apart. We see each other once or twice a month and he's coming over for the Super Bowl.

    At my last congregation, there was only one guy who I might call friend. Although he was more somebody to hang out with. I always thought of him as kinda dumb and kind of an asshole. But he was willing to ignore the JW rules with us once in a while, so we got along. I lost touch with him because (a) his parents thought my brother and I and him together meant trouble and (b) because we stopped coming and drifted apart.

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    I had many who I considered true friends, well on second thought that was conditional on me staying a strong JW, any weakness on my part and they were gone. Even too busy to go out in service with me sometimes.

    I had a friendship with a sister that lasted years even during the time I left my X and stopped going to meetings. She said I was going through a worldly phase and would get over it. I heard from her regularly until I told her I questioned the WTS and shared with her stuff about the UN and Silent Lambs and the Dateline show on pedophiles.

    Soon after that discussion she sent me an email and said we could no longer be friends because I was a threat to her spirituallity.......I miss her. I hope some day she'll wake up, but unfortunately I won't be the one to do it as I'm honoring my friends request.

    I think I'll pray to Jah that she'll see the light..................

  • JustTickledPink
    JustTickledPink

    I had 1 best friend, absolute best friend. We did everything together, and talked every day. We pioneered, goofed off, went dancing, chased boys, took a trip to SD for unassigned territory, went to Europe. We often joked if one of us got DF'd we'd still always be friends... but then I faded away and she cut off contact with me, even before I was DF'd.

    She did call me about a year and a half ago out of the blue, but only wanted to know when I was "coming back" and she didn't really want to socialize.

    I always believe if I had a really true friend, we would still be friends.

  • ValiantBoy
    ValiantBoy

    I had some people that I really loved and that I thought really loved me. Of course it was dependant on me remaining a Witness...I still love them and would be there for them, but they have nothing to do with me. Very sad.

  • Incense_and_Peppermints
    Incense_and_Peppermints

    you mean real true friends you could completely be yourself with? hmm... two: a girl and a guy. the guy's mom was really domineering, but thankfully he didn't get all wimpy. he always rebelled behind her back. and my best friend she got DF'd and kicked out of her house when she was only 14. i called everybody else "sister" and "brother" but them, and they were the only ones i was really close to. i wonder if the guy is still in. i don't think the girl is, she was too much of a free spirit to be captive for long...

  • blondie
    blondie

    one, my husband.

    by my definition anyway.

    Someone who puts you first.

    Someone who won't turn you into the elders; someone who will talk to you after you are DF'd.

  • franklin J
    franklin J

    ...I am ashamed to say, none.

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