A Divided Household (page 2)

vitty

This is so important. I mean to expect a spouse to give up celebrating Bdays and xmas, cos you say so.

When I told my husband I was studing he was so understanding, our child was nearly two when I told him no more xmas. He said ok

If that had been me and hed said he was joining the mormons or whatever id of had a dicky fit.

We are given so much backing that our partners are the ones who are being unreasonable if they object we just expect them to conform, even the kids

I know one girl whoes given up her husband, I think she thought it would be easier without him. Think shes regreting it now, shes very lonely. Everyones got there own lives, but I did try to warn her.

She thought she would pioneer get to all the meeting, kids would not have bad influence of dad. It just dont happen.

Shes so depressed, misses lots of FS and meetings and all she gets now is critisium and to rely on J

The cong get so bored with people who have problems!!!!!!!!!!!!

peggy

Your post brought me to tears! It brought back so many memories of my own divided household. My parents managed to stay together, still are married after 54 years. I love my dad, he didn't always handle things right, but I know he lost out on a normal life living with all of us. Of my four siblings, none of us has been able to maintain a relationship. My brother is on his forth wife. He disassoiciated from the WTS, and became a Mormon. My other sister divorced over twenty years ago, and has basicly never dated. My other sister is on her third husband. Both of my sisters are active witnesses. I will be divorced after 28 years of marriage this spring. I am inactive.

I often wonder what life would have been like had those witnesses not converted my mom when I was 4. I'll never know.

ko38

I always did have a problem with the belief that no one would be saved except JW's.Its so much of a joy to me now to understand that was a crock.

I have loved ones who have passed away that I now know if there is a ressurection they will be in it.I bet it is the same for you and your father.

Father and daughter relationships are special,Dads can always "make it better"It was your fathers love for you and his family that allowed him to endure things that he didnt understand or feel that he should take away from you.

Its strange as we get older how we see what really means the most to us is the unconditional love that only families and close friends can give.Why cant we see it when we are young?No organization has our best interest at heart.Your memory of your father is a fond one and Im sure he was well deserving of the promise of God according to the ressurection.

M.J.

Just the fact that you have woken up to the truth about "the truth" would make your dad so happy and proud of you!

upside/down

Your dad was obviously the only "true Christian" in the family.

Very Christlike if you ask me... and when you see him again imagine his pride in you!

He stood alone and set a fine example whether others followed or not... same as my dad, and yet didn't have a "religious" bone in his body.

u/d (of the love my dad too class)

marcosgarcia

Good to know you take daily showers! Nothing like clean living.

Your thoughts really hit home for me. Yes your dad did give up a lot, but he did not give up on you, did he? He was there and that is what every kid wants. I am so thankful my parnets were there for me.

Yes, living in a divided house is difficult. My situation is the opposite of what yours was... only one JW in my house --- her. Growig up JW is one thing, but converting and having holidays and birthdays that were previously celebrated taken away is in my opinion is not fair to the kids. I simply will not allow it to happen and find myself pulling in the opposite direction to make sure my kids have holidays, birhtdays etc.... it is such a big part of our culture.

Thanks for your beautiful thoughts and be HAPPY dad was there for you...smile life is good...enjoy it!

...

HadEnuf

I cannot even begin to express how much all of your stories and words of comfort and understanding meant to me today. I have been kind of avoiding this forum because sometimes it brings up too many painful memories and I feel like I need to move on and not live so much in the past. But I always check in now and then to hear what so many of you have to say that not only touches my heart but gives me strength to deal with any new "blows" that come just from living with what I really believe is Post Traumatic Witness Stress Disorder (or for short, PTWSD). Arghhhhhhhhhhhh....long sentences there!

So many of your comments just made me cry again. Guess I better get out the kleenex. I so much agree with everyone's comments about what a good person my dad must have been to put up with that. BINGO! You got that right. Also that he was really the Christian and not us. I guess the reason I was thinking of him was that I have gotten into scrapbooking and going through tons of old photo's and so many are of him with my kids and myself and my brother & sister (who now shun me...hey, THEIR loss...I don't give a darn anymore...well, I do but I don't). He would have been my link to family. JW's look down on the family members that are "unbelievers". It should be the other way around in my mind. But then, that would be acting just like them. Yuk. THAT's a scary thought.

Big hug back to you all. Sure...that sounds mushy and corny...but I'm through worrying about what people think of me. "What people think of me is none of my business". Cathy L.

P.S. Yup Double Edge...I am an alien in my picture. Alienated from the JW's. I actually wore those to my hubbies x-mas party. Too bad everyone else there dressed up. HAHAHA on me!!! I just couldn't understand why no one would make eye contact with me. Go figure. HA!

P.P.S. Hey Blondie girl! Maybe when spring rolls around we can get together. The boys might have a gig in Madison some time this spring and maybe we can arrange dinner or something together. Say hi to IrREVerent for us. Cathy L.

Brummie

Looks like we have a lot in common Hadenuf, thoughts run pretty deep when we think these things through dont they. We must have been thinking along the same lines recently

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/84408/1.ashx

Sometimes I guess its good for these things to surface (even if we are in the shower lol) so that we can deal with them and reach some closure rather than keep them buried.

Thanks for sharing your story, sorry the Watchtower movement had such an impact on your family relationships.

(hug)

Brummie

HadEnuf

Dear Brummie: Thanks so much for posting the link to your comments and your experience. What you wrote should be required reading for anyone who comes to this site and is studying and wonders what life will be like once they give their lives over to the organization. I read every word of your post and it touched my heart; I am glad I got to read it. Though it made me cry (again...must be hormones) it was so appreciated. Yes...we have been thinking along the same lines. I am glad though that you got your mom back and she and your dad were able to overcome the mind control of the JW's.

Big hug...Cathy L.

HappyDad

HadEnuf,

Thanks for that great post. I'm all choked up now and it isn't even 7AM here!

You brought back a lot of memories for me since that is basically how it was with my Dad too. I'm just glad that he and I got real close again the last few years of his life. Nothing will bring back the years we missed because of this DAMN religion.

I miss you dad. I love you. Be happy wherever you are.

Love,

HappyDad

A Divided Household

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