The more I live this life the more I come to the conclusion that this life doesn't belong to me entirely. I am constantly brought to the realization that I'm living living in the footsteps of my father. I never really understood what he was going thru until I got to be an adult. Now that I am an adult, all the lines between where I am as a man and where my father once was, have become forever blurred.
Its a creepy concept as my father was a very emotionally dark person, extremely private. Had a thing about his personal airspace not being invaded. Listened to little music but lots of news and talk radio programs. He was not a very happy individual and was suspected of having nervous breakdowns and just a very bitter person. All of which is becoming more clearly the emotional clothes that I wear as well. He wasn't a witness, but apparently wanted to be one when we were kids. Pop would take us to the Kingdom Hall, long before I even knew what a Kingdom Hall was.
Most of our JW parents are/were deeply disturbed people.
as for living someone elses life .. I have looked into this deeply and your suspicions are proved correct. You are currently living the life of Gumby and I think you should give it back!
u, living the life of dannyboy but wishing I was living the life of brummie or beck_melbourne.
My father was an apostate (by jws standards) many years ago, and I did not really know this until a few years ago. I did not really understand what he was going through, but now I do. He used to say many of the things I see on the xjw boards now. He kept his life very private from his family b/c we were devout jws and most likley would have reported him. I feel sad now thinking about it.
What a difference if the poor man had access to the internet as we do.
These stories are a reminder too that there are many thousands of walking wounded exjws out there who have no idea this wonderful therapy and companionship exist.
uncle bruce makes a good point. it would have been difficult to be an apostate in the eighties and early nineties... they really helped pave the way for us as well. instead of posting some info on a website, they would have to hold signs at conventions. instead of secretly searching the internet for info on the JW movement, they would have to accept apostate material in public. we have some things pretty good over here!
I used to feel like this when I was in the borg, but not now. I'm so over my sanctimonius self - I'm much more comfortable being a wicked, vomit eating dog, gouging the eyeball of christ apostate!
we were devout jws and most likley would have reported him
Wednesday, you reminded me of the scumbag that I was. My ex father in law, a kindly dottery Slim Dusty fan used to always accept apostate literature and would engage in conversations with apostates when he would come across them on the doors. He was counselled from time to time and told NOT to engage in conversation with such ones. I recall on one occassion reporting him to the elders for being disobedient because he chose to not only accept an apostate booklet, but he was seen 'reading' it. What a mole I was.
Beck, the time period was the 40's -through 80's.( I was not around for all of it) Long before the net .This was when the only way u could get the apostate literature was to talk to someone who was picketing at an assembly. I recall a man once standing up at an assembly in Waco Texas and yelling at the speaker. They threw him physically out the door. People just laughed at him. Life was tough for the apostates then. Armstrong was consdered an apostate by some and anyone having his literature was suspect. Dad had his literature, but kept it well hid. I found it years after he was gone.
that was very profound . OH. My mom used to say life is so short, and becomes shorter as u get older .If I could just quit living in the past, mine would be better.
Today is the future we were wishing for.
Did u mean u joined the JWS as a result of Armstrong?
i feel im living my own life - but hey, we get like those we live with. Our parents have a huge influence on who we become. We copy what we see. Thats true in our adult relationships as well. I used to be married to a real miserable git and I became one myself. I also worked with people who swore all the time. it shocked me at first. but then i started to swear myself and it became the norm.
if you want to be a particular person, you have to surround yourself by the type of people you want to be like.
i want to be a young, beautiful, millionaire........i think im keeping the wrong company!
