Wanting to leave JWs & Spouse problems

by doinmypart 25 Replies latest jw friends

  • 95stormfront
    95stormfront
    Go to the meetings as you can, be nice, don't rock the boat. Don't share your personal views with the people there. She wants to be there with her husband, not alone. Fill the need. Don't badmouth the Society to her. Over time she will accept what you want to do, and you will be able to go less and less as you like. You can share with her, in an informative way the things that you have realized and feel about the WTS. This should be done in an atmosphere of normal sharing between spouses. Keep negativity out of it. let her know that you are just thinking for yourself.

    3. Once she is comfortable with things, help her to understand that this isn't for you, and you want to do other things with your free time. Nothing negative. Just that you need your time too, like she needs her time and she wants the Meetings. You don't stop her from the Meetings, and she shouldn't try and stop you from what you want to do. Mutual respect for one another.

    Although I think this advice is very good, I think everyones mileage from it will differ. Mine was definitely different.

    I tried going to meetings with my wife, being nice, not rocking the boat, just filling the need for me to be there with her. Sitting there listening to the same old veiled threats and tired rhetoric wore on me like a piece of chalk screeeeching across a chalkboard. My attitude progressed from conciliation and appeasing, to me being angry and scowling the morning before and the whole time sitting there at meetings thinking of all the other things I'd rather be doing than sitting their faking fellowship, to actually being sickened by even walking into a KH. At one time, I was literally barfing all the way from the car to the KH door.

    Didn't matter to her....I made it to the meeting!

    This had the oposite affect her coming to understand that I wanted something different. It didn't garner acceptance from her of what I wanted to do, rather, it reinforced the idea in her mind that I was going because I "knew that was where I was supposed to be" and that anything that produced in me a negative feeling about the meetings was Satan attacking me trying to drag me away from the truth.

    Time and time again I had to tell her I have no desire to live a debauched life, wasn't "coming out of the closet", didn't plan on leaving her, was not abandoning a belief in God.........I just wanted to be Me!!!!

    Normal sharing of feelings between us as spouses was fine......until any issue that dealt with the WT came up. I tired quickly of her heaping so much unfounded praise on the WT organization all the while ignoring the gaping holes in their worldview, how they were making me feel, and how they were beginning to make me increasingly uncomfortable. To her, my feelings didn't matter; all she wanted was conformity to the images she wanted to project and what was expected as a male JW in good standing reaching out for privileges.

    It got to the point where I had to tell her that I could no longer define where her worship of the organization ended and where it began with worshipping God.

    I remember one night in particular. She'd been going on and on grilling me for 3 or 4 hours straight about why I didn't want to go to meetings anymore and me repeating my same reasons to her over and over again, she telling me how I could do what I want to do and still make time for the meetings, me telling her as politely and PC as I could that I had no desire to go to meetings anymore, didn't care much for the rigid structure of WT dictated scheduling, eventually getting so sick to my stomache by the whole ordeal that I was driven to driviing the porcelain bus.

    Coming out of the bathroom, wiping my mouth, unperturbed she began again...........and I snapped !!!!!!!

    My tactful display had run it's course. My patience was at an end.

    These events actually happened roughly 12 years ago. The exact details, though I'm sure I didn't get physically violent, are sketchy at best. I remember the anger inside of me boiling over and seeing red. I remember my muscles tensing, my lips moving, a few words to the effect of "this is MY LIFE........" being spoken, the initial terror and final resignation on her face messaging "you are hearing his final words on this issue".

    Only then did she get the message that although I wouldn't stop her from going to the meetings, guilt trips, veiled armageddic threats, or force on her part wouldn't compel me to go any further. Only then, did I get the mutual respect I'd so craved the two years prior.

    There were some tense moments in our home after that, usually occuring around meeting time when I knew she was doing everything she could to not ask or insist that I go with her. Those moments have turned into non-events now as she gets ready for meetings and comes and goes in her WT activities as she pleases.

    I've come full circle from the barfing raving lunatic I know she thought I'd become, to the person I'm comfortable and satisfied with being. The personal growth I've realized has enriched and surprised both of us........I'm doing things I'd never thought possible or thought I'd have a chance to do when I was a dub. One hobby I've developed, flying single engine aircraft, had a couple of JW door knockers who knew me so green with envy that the next week they had a couple of elders over asking me questions about it.

    Me and my wife share what I like to describe as a "comfortable truce" now. I've demonstrated that I had no intention of leaving her, if she wanted to continue in her WT activities I'd respect that and support her, but that I expect the same and will not tolerate the devalueing of things I like and hold dear to do just because they may be "frowned upon" by the congregation or the WTS.

  • Goldminer
    Goldminer

    Very interesting!I'm in the same boat as many guys here.I'm trying my best to just fade away but my wife is making it very hard.

    She called one of her so-called jw friends last night who gave her a hard time because she doesn't attend all her meetings and is thinking of sending our little boy to a catholic school.Anyways,she was quite upset after and gave me a call at work.We ended up having a long chat about the WTS.

    I told I love her and I'm not leaving her,I'm not looking to have an affair because I don't want to got to the meetings(that seems to be a jw mentality),I just want to be left alone.I told her about all her jw friends who have turned their backs on her and that she seems happier working,volunteering and doing group hobbies with "worldly people".

    She says she just wants the man she married back,and I keep telling her,I'm still ME,I haven't changed.The religion makes me literally sick,mentally and emotionally and just drains me of happiness.

    Then we talked of a lot of wrong things in the WTS.I brought up about love,she had to agree.We discussed 1975 and I told how wrong it was to mislead people in such a way the blame them when they were disappointed.I mentioned how some thruths change(1914 generation)and it's ok for the WTS to do that,but if I change my mind I'm an apostate.We talked about a lot of other things and she could see my point.

    The next day she didn't bring it up,she just wants to feel bad because she's not doing what she should be!!!!I'm hoping in time she'll open her eyes,I'm working hard on the love thing,or the lack of it in the org.

    Hang in there buddy,we're in this together.

  • doinmypart
    doinmypart

    Thanks to everyone for sharing your experiences, it helps to know one isn't alone in this situation.

    Goldminer "she just wants the man she married back", I've also heard those words too. Hang in there.

    LittleToe, sorry things didn't work out for you. I hope things are much improved for you outside the WT walls.

    Are there any ladies out there going through something similar?

  • iiz2cool
    iiz2cool

    I was going to try to fade but the elders got too pushy with me so I DA'd. My wife became even more active as a result. Then I got more vocal in my criticizms of the watchtower. Now the marriage is toast.

    Walter

  • Honesty
    Honesty
    Sisters in the congregation will to start to advise and "comfort" her about her situation.

    And that is one of the reasons we are now divorced.

    Isn't it strange that they all worry about the spouse who is still being deceived by the WTBTS rather than asking themselves why the other one has seen the light.

  • vitty
    vitty

    From a wifes point of view.

    When my husband wanted out, I nearly flipped, I hated him for what he was doing to me and the family. He was a servant, did visiting talks, was on the builds, baptism you name it he was doing it. Then he got a feeling that they where going to ask him to be a elder, he really started concidering what this meant.

    We as a family where under a lotof pressure with meetings, field service and he had a "proper" job, you know how it goes.

    Anyway he wanted to step down as a servant,I pleaded with him not to but he did, from that moment on it happened as I expected. Everyones attitude changed towards us, I coulnt believe it, anyway he kept going for me, but by this time he had serious doubts it was the truth.

    Anyway to cut a long story short and a couple of really bad years, I found this site myself and I have never looked back we have both stopped going to meetings for about 9 months now

    I cant tell you how happy we are now, with neither of us trying to do the "right" thing are now just ourselves. So please dont give up on her, tell her you love her and dont make her have to defend the org and maybe one day she will see for herself

  • Golf
    Golf

    doingmypart, Vittvin suggested sound advice, "So please don't give up on her, tell you love her and don't make her have to defend the org., maybe one day she will see for herself."

    Take it from a person who's married 42 years. This is a time when less is better.


    Guest77

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    doinmypart
    But they wouldn't accept my letter to step aside!

    I've had my share of manipulative bosses, and I've had this happen to me! The trick is to resign and then do it. If they sign you up for speaking parts, "forget" to do them. Come down with a horking cough. Drop the mike in Sister Willnevermarry's lap. Vaccum up all the field service slips. Be a calculated incompetent.

    Almost Athiest

    Great advice,

    Your wife needs to know that you love her because you WANT to and NEED to, not because you HAVE to.

    Excellent tips, Bluegrass Tom. I think you may have good success with this approach.

    Goldminer , this is so true!
    The next day she didn't bring it up,she just wants to feel bad because she's not doing what she should be!!

    My honey plays ?hookey? and then goes on a three day guilt-fest, doubling his efforts to be a good JW. He won?t admit he has more fun away from the meeting.

    By the way, guys, Amazing 1914 documented his plan to get his entire family out of the watchtower. His is a success story. If I remember right, his instructions went something like this:

    1. Have a plan and stick to it.

    2. Gradually introduce independent thinking in to the family.

    3. He conducted bible studies, as was his right as head of the household. They started using the bible alone. He asked lots of open-ended questions, and encouraged independent thinking.

    4. When they expressed the same concerns he had come to, then he prepared his family for leaving.

    Excellent thread. I would like to move this thread to Lady Lee?s best of...section. Moderators?

  • googlemagoogle
    googlemagoogle

    my wife always freaks out when i say something "negative about the org". so i simply try to not talk to her about it. i can reveal a few things now and then not talking directly about the org though. but there's little chance she'd wake up. and even if she would, we couldn't leave because of the rest of the family.

  • wannaexit
    wannaexit

    I was what your wife is today. I accused my husband for years of being an apostate and threatened to leave him if he left the org.

    He tried for ten years to help me out. He didin't give up and I am so grateful because today I am mentally free from the borg.

    We have not faded yet because of family. But that is our goal.

    Be patient and don't give up it takes some longer than others for the rose colored glasses to come off.

    wanna

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