If you really wanted to speak to people, and felt an urgent duty because the 'end is near' why aren't the JWs in the shopping centres, streets, and generally where the people are?
Hey, obviously you haven't been "paying close attention" at the assembly.......we ARE supposed to be going out to the shopping malls, streets, public toilets and hospital delivery rooms to preach seeing as no one's at home Saturday morning. Last assembly, we were told that we should be going out in Service an hour before the Bookstudy so we can get people at home "during the dinner hour". Yes, that's right, forget the fact that people really hate to be bugged by door knockers at supper time, just look at it like "they can't escape! They must answer the door!"
Or if you want to go preaching out at the Mall, here's what you can do to get the ever-important hours in:
Go inside a stall in the public washroom at your local shopping mall and wait for a victim to appear. As soon as you hear them go into their own stall, wait 20 seconds and then dash out of your stall and start preaching to them, maybe by asking if they think mankind will ever be able to solve the problem of diarrhea or constipation. Giggle at their predicament, secure in the knowledge that they can't get away from you and have to pay "close attention" to what you're saying. Ignore their verbal threats by talking louder than them, shouting if necessary. If you think they're getting close to coming out, quickly shove the latest articles of the Botchtower and Awake! magazines under their stall, and offer them a free bathroom bible study. For the truly daring, you might thrust your other outstretched hand under the stall and ask them if they would care to contribute to the world-wide preaching work. Keep it moving back and forth because they may, in their fury, try to stamp on your hand.
When you're pretty sure that they are going to be coming out soon, tell them how much you enjoyed talking to them and prepare to leave. On your way out, flick the bathroom light on and off several times, giving the room a "disco" effect. This will temporarily confuse and/or blind them, giving you a chance to get away.
Head for the nearest coffee shop, waiting 10 minutes and then repeat above performance. Make sure you've got health coverage because you will eventually be caught and will have the living shit beat out of you.
Report each session as a Return Visit.........hehehehehehehehe..........
