Whats the WEIRDEST/FUNNIEST teaching of the WTBTS? (page 2)

Mary

I can't just name one!

Brothers can't have a beard and be anything in the congregation......even though Jesus had a beard.

Birthdays are forbidden because you're the center of attention and it's from pagan origin.......Wedding anniversaries are fine even though you're the center of attention and many of the customs are from pagan origin.

Having sex with an animal isn't considered "fornication" (from the Aid to Bible Understanding)

Jehovah lives in the Dagoba System, along with Yoda..........or someplace like that according to Charles Russell.

New Worldly Translation

From four to six quarts of warm water injected into the colon
is what constitutes an internal bath. It should be taken every
day for at least six months...(Golden Age, 3/31/1920 p.437-8)

Haha, I've never heard that one before. I always learn something new from your excellent & informative posts Gary

With friends like the WBTS who needs enemas!

logansrun

Remember, it's the information board, not the bulletin board. Pagan.

B.

bikerchic

A lie is not a lie when it's considered Spiritual Warfare?.

jaffacake

That New Covenant is not for modern Christians is as weird as it can get for me personally!

Mary - how do you know Jesus had a beard? you're not confusing him with CT Russell are 'ya?

Nosferatu

The Revelation book.

'nuff said.

ButtLight

If men arent suppose to have beards, then why did jehovah give them facial hair to begin with????? So stupid

EvilForce

Logansrun .... information board not bulletin board.... LMAO!

I remember sitting in a meeting about that subject. We the speaker said "Churches have bulletin boards WE have information boards....", I was thinking to myself, he's going to incorporate this into some joke right? No, he was SERIOUS! I was like "Jehovah ought to strike you down right now for wasting precious oxygen for this drivel." So much for meaty spiritual food!

But I think the silliest teaching is that the resurrected ones will not want to get married and have children. When I'd ask people about this they would say... "well they will be perfect then, God will make them like Angels that way"..... ummm...hello? Adam was perfect and was still lonely, you know the whole reason for the "Eve" thing. Also, um, Angel's? Didn't they come down to Earth in fleshly form to get a piece of ass? Why are you being so silly BORG....it's not wrong to say "We don't fully know what God intends", instead of trying to come up with such odd / specific rules, regulations, and procedures.

jt stumbler

Ditto.. Nos

mustang

That "hey, you wanna read these magazines" (voice out of a tree, w/ an arm thrusting a magazine in your face) is an acceptable "magazine presentation".

Mustang

Whats the WEIRDEST/FUNNIEST teaching of the WTBTS?

Share this