by new boy 19 Replies latest jw friends
I know I was!------------ In my "20s" There was no one more "self righteous" then me.
I thought everyone should be pioneering since we were so close to 1975!
I actully had a card make up to hand to people saying "Have sword will travel"------on the bottom it said A A A {available after armageddon} because I tought anyone who got married before then was a slacker.
What a "Jerk" I was!!!
I think, for me the best defence was a good offense, that maybe deep down I knew it was all BS.
NB
I did have a high opinion of myself and at times could be rather hard on others.
I remember when my stepfather had a serious accident, he nearly died and took a blood transfusion (he was not a JW by the way).
I had the cheek to condemn him before the family for breaking one of God's commandments - what the hell was I thinking of ?
I also told a charity worker that as a practising JW I did not believe in giving money to other religious organizations (she was working for Christian Aid I believe) as they were condemned by Jehovah for being part of Babylon The Great To her credit she took out her Bible and asked me where it actually said that... I walked away feeling internally smug.
That is how twisted up my brain was at the time.
I can honestly say, that I no longer think or feel the way I used to.
in hindsight yeah i probably was ..........although to be fair i was also funny...and talented...and cute.... and humble
No one really wants to think of themselfs as self righteous. I think most of us would rather down play our judgementalness,and what "jerks" we were to others who didn't have the "tooth"
No doubt I was, and the younger the worse. My non-JW mother recently showed me letters I sent her in my teens (when I was living with my JW father) and I was quite ashamed of the constant preachy tone...
Of course it covered a huge insecurity. The more you know the less you claim.
I was a total prick. Pioneer at 16, ms at 19, public talks at twenty, etc. told on my firends for minor infractions of the rules, etc. I still have to watch that tendency to judge others or try to exalt myslef.
I was a little bit a first due to pressure and who my associates were as I was a pioneer. It wasn't me though not the real me and I couldn't continue such an attitude, it began to disgust me and I spoke out against such egotism as being wrong. I thought the ones needing help and mercy were the weak and that we shouldn't be judging them. What purpose is their served in speaking negatively of your fellow worshipers even if they may be classed as weak or not.
Along with direct study of Christ's attitude toword others free from watchtower bias further showed and enforced the correct attitude. So quickly I began to reach out to these ones classed as weak because I did not acknowledge the supposed class distinction nor found any evidence for its justification. My congregation was very self rightious and if you didn't cut the mustard you didn't fit in, their was a huge rift between two groups. I heard many many very judgemental and self rightous comments. Very clicky and many were left out and hurt badly. I could not help but think of Jesus warning at Luke 6:42 "Or how can you tell your brother, 'Brother, let me remove the speck of chaff that is in your eye,' when you yourself don't see the beam that is in your own eye? You hypocrite! First remove the beam from your own eye, and then you can see clearly to remove the speck of chaff that is in your brother's eye.:
This warning bothered my concscience. I attempted to bridge this gap and was very well liked by some because I didnt judge, we were all attempting to be christians and their should have been no scale of 1-10. On the otherhand it also made me unpopular with some. I even promoted this attitude of mercy through my talks but see where it got me now. A quick ticket out of the org., they want the opposite of what we should give much like the pharisees. The Org. wants sacrifice not mercy, and I took Jesus words to heart " I want mercy not sacrifice." Guess that scripture went over their heads. So the multitude of my two and a half decades was mostly one of kindness but thats what made me an unwanted member by many in the local authority structure of the congregation. I have even recieved lashings from a circuit overseer for going against the disfellowshippng stance.
Basically I seen the flipside of self rightousness as it was directed toword me from others. They campainged and attempted my DF(of which they are still unsucessful) over a matter of showing love and mercy to ones in need. It still stumps me to try and think why such ones would hold such an unbiblical stance in good conscience.
Ticker
ticker...man do i hear you.....nothing to add
I was (am?) more self righteous as an ex Witness than I ever was as a Witness.
I changed my name from Self-righteous to logansrun years ago.
B.
