The most repulsive thing ever said to me by the elders was when I was separated from my first husband, who had drug/alcohol/temper issues was this: if he comes knocking on my door even if he's drunk and it's the middle of the night, I am to let him in to have sex with me anytime he wants it. I remember thinking--yeah right, I'm just here for him to use me. It really made me sick and I remember telling my JW friend and my JW sister about it, and I could tell it bothered them too. I would never allow someone to disrespect me like that.
The most condescending thing said to you by the (sm)elders.
by diamondblue1974 67 Replies latest jw experiences
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zaphod
i have posted this on another thread, but the worst thing an elders wife ever said to me was that a sister was partly to blame for her husband sexually abusing her daughter because she had been withholding sex from him. she had post natal depression at the time.
she also said to me, as i was a single mother at the time, that i may have taken "comfort" from my children when i was alone.
i said i did not like what she was implying and that it was a world of difference between cuddling your child when you are both upset and what that brother had done. she seemed to see no difference and stood by her ideas.
zaphod
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BrendaCloutier
This was recently when I met an elder in Salvation Army Thrift Store
( http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/9/88285/1.ashx if you're interested... )
He said to me that I wasn't satisfied being a woman that I wanted men's privledges! Because it wasn't conducive to the current discussion (regarding 1975) I disreagarded it, otherwise I would have rerouted his arse.
I've had other assinine things said, some worse, some just plain stoopid. But that one was meant to insult.
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undercover
I've lost count of the condescending things said to me by jerk elders over the years. (disclaimer: not all elders are bad, but the bad ones more than destroy any good that the good ones do).
I remember one pious self-righteous elder who I had mostly avoided since he had moved into our hall. He didn't know me that well because I had figured out that he was a power hungry jerk and I avoided him. He came to my house(first time he had been there in over 10 years of being in the same hall) and proceeded to tell me my personality faults and how I could do more at the hall. I ended that conversation real quick by telling him that he didn't know me, he didn't know my situation or my personality and that he had a lot of nerve to come into my house and try to tell me the how and why of things. The other elder with him saw that a line had been crossed and excused both of them and left immediately. He apologized for the first elder later and I told him he had nothing to apologize for, he didn't do anything and that I appreciated him seeing that things were spiralling out of control and deciding it was time to leave. The first elder never apologized or spoke to me again. Mission accomplished.
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diamondblue1974
I have posted this on another thread, but the worst thing an elders wife ever said to me was that a sister was partly to blame for her husband sexually abusing her daughter because she had been withholding sex from him. she had post natal depression at the time.
she also said to me, as i was a single mother at the time, that i may have taken "comfort" from my children when i was alone.
i said i did not like what she was implying and that it was a world of difference between cuddling your child when you are both upset and what that brother had done. she seemed to see no difference and stood by her ideas.WTF...it goes to show that some JW's have no particular idea of what seperates paternal and maternal love from sexual abuse...no wonder paedophiles flourish within the JW's.
How can you even partly justify child abuse by suggesting it was because he was sexually frustrated? yes by all means masturbate, go see a prostitute as immoral that might be but a child....Zaphod I dont know how you didnt fly off the handle.
I cant get over that....how sick?
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Little Red Hen
(((jeannieB))) (((love2B)))
Thank goodness I never had to deal with that kind of loving crap. I did have an elder who was a pharmacist approach me after a Thurs. night book study asking me how I was feeling. I told him I was feeling fine. He then replied he was very concerned about me, because of the medicine I was taking. He asked why I was taking it, and I did tell him it was for migraines. He said it was some pretty powerful stuff, and questioned why my doctor would prescribe it.
I never took my scripts to his store, but being part of a national chain, he must have felt that his shepherding included med checks and second guessing of physicians.
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Elsewhere
she also said to me, as i was a single mother at the time, that i may have taken "comfort" from my children when i was alone.
i said i did not like what she was implying and that it was a world of difference between cuddling your child when you are both upset and what that brother had done. she seemed to see no difference and stood by her ideas.
Damn
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Little Red Hen
she also said to me, as i was a single mother at the time, that i may have taken "comfort" from my children when i was alone...she seemed to see no difference and stood by her ideas.
God!! How sick!! She sounds like my MIL. Wonder what kind of sick criminal fun and games went on at her house.
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zaphod
i don't know how i bit my tongue, db. i wouldn't do it now.
even worse, this conversation happened on the way to the mental hospital, where the young mother was after trying to take her life after the abuse took place.
i just had a thought. i bet this compassionate sister was counting this visit as time. she obviously didn't really care for the girl and she wasn't baptised, just studying. yep, i bet she even counted the journey as time because i was just studying then too.
holy crap. i need to stop thinking about these shits. they just make me so angry
zaphod
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franklin J
when I left regular pioneering ( after 4 years of regular pioneering...) to pursue an education for Architecture; one pompous elder came up to me and said " how is going to college going to help you in the new system" .
I ignored his question.