The most condescending thing said to you by the (sm)elders.

by diamondblue1974 67 Replies latest jw experiences

  • eljefe
    eljefe

    I used to have a roommate who was the PO. He decided that I spent too much time on the computer. So for the 3 months every talk on the platform was applied towards not using the computer so much. He wasn't the only one giving this advice, every other elder and MS was doing it. They even took the time to look at me while they dispensed this counsel. Ah the good old judgemental times.

  • Nico Maye
    Nico Maye

    It was acually when i phoned the elder that had put me through hell and demanded an apology from him that he said the most ass-en-i-ing thing i had ever heard. This is a rather long story, but the main points of the story are my dad was dying of cancer and my mom was having a breakdown and i was trying to hold my little brother together while meanwhile feeling super suicidal and depressed. Well, it seems i had written some letters to a friend that included swearing and boy talk (i was sixteen, i think this is fairly normal) and they had been found by her crazy step father. He took them to the elders, and of course i had an elders meeting and everything was solved ( i wore all black and my dad answered most of the questions). So my family and I pass this stress. Then another call...seems my hair is "too bright". I had dyed it red and some JW kids reported me to the elders. My mother is lectured and i am lectured and my dad and i fight. Then they call again, seems i'm wearing glitter and that is also wrong. Dad and i fight about glitter. I guess Jehovah hates glitter. Then yet another call about these god damned notes i wrote my buddy. They want my parents to see them. My parents are already stressed, now even angrier at me for not writing the letter but writing them to this girl who has a crazy father. My dad is flipping out, which is terrible when you are trying to fight cancer. I was crying, which is terrible when you want to die, my mom was fighting, my brothers are crying. No one called to see what they could do, they called to cause unnecessary stress on my family that was ripping apart at the seems. My dad died not long after and we weren't talking. He had acually asked me to leave the home because of the stress. I was a teenager. I was trying to make a stand in the world and I was a really good witness other than the fact i wore glitter and dyed my hair red.

    When i asked the elder why he had done what he did he said he was doing it for my family. He was doing it to stop the stress "i was causing"

    When i told him that my parents were the ones that let me do it and that they were the ones that saw me everyday when i left for school everyday, he had nothing to say. It was the idiots in my small town congregation that had the issues. it was them who were upset by my "behavior?"

    anyways i didn't end up getting an apology but that elders family soon fell apart. His son slept with his brothers wife and they were disfellowshipped. Hahahahah!! i can't say i didn't laugh and laugh and laugh

    Nico

  • nelly1
    nelly1

    for me it was this, i was studying and my partner at the time had taken our checkbook and spent our food money for me and the kids on booze and ciggarettes etc and this elder said to me hes the head of the house you need to let him do whatever he likes with the money, so i sarcastically said " ok I will then YOU can feed my kids this week !!!!) that shut him up, hes a creep always was always will be a pharisitical asshole, scuse my french.

  • upside/down
    upside/down

    Holy Cow, Nico Maye.... sorry!

    That's pitiful....with "friends" like that who needs enemies?

    u/d (of the got plenty of "friends" class)

  • lisaBObeesa
    lisaBObeesa

    While chatting in anJW AOL Chat room I got this IM::

    JW: are you mae or female
    JW: male?

    ME: lol, why??
    ME: I'm female!

    JW: if your a female never correct a brother, especially in public, And 2 john 9 -11 is talking about those who leave the truth apostates not the anytichrist

    ME: oh, my, may I please post that in the room?>??
    ME: you are wrong about that verse, by the way, please give me a moment. *(OK, I know that was not nice to correct him again, but I couldn't stop myself, ok?? Not after the 'never correct a brother' comment!)*

    JW: thats up to you, But if I were an active JW I wouldnt do anything in chat i wouldnt do at the hall
    ]
    JW: *** w99 7/15 30 Questions From Readers ***
    3. On quite a different scale of gravity, Paul wrote to the Corinthians about one who practices gross sin and is not repentant. Such unrepentant sinners had to be excluded from the congregation. The "wicked" man had to be handed over to Satan, as it were

    JW: Thereafter, loyal Christians were not to mix with such wicked ones; the apostle John urged Christians not even to greet them. (1 Corinthians 5:1-13; 2 John 9-11) This, however, does not fit the counsel of 2 Thessalonians 3:14 either.

    JW: not talking about the Antichrist but thanks for letting me know your not a JW

    ME: read verse seven, please.
    ME: how did you know, because I corrected you?

    JW: VS 7 is talking about the antichrist the other verses afterwards is talking about MEN
    JW: look out the MEN dont decieve you
    JW: sorry to show you your wrong any further Ims will be ignored

  • love11
    love11

    Nico- I'm sooo sorry to hear you went through that. Even though your dad seemed mad at you, I know that glitter and red hair dye cannot alter a parents love for their child. I hope that you are healing and that you are now at peace with what has happened. Love

  • lisaBObeesa
    lisaBObeesa

    Nico, What a story. I am sorry those people hurt you and your family like that. They have no love. They are too worried about the stupid meaningless crap to be bothered with LOVE.

  • delilah
    delilah

    I am so repulsed by what I have read here....It's disgusting that these men are so self-righteous and opinionated. They do not shepherd the flock of Christ, not do they have the mind of Christ. How dare they be so presumptuous as to toss people aside as worthless and useless.....My family had suffered from carbon monoxide poisoning, due to the carelessness of a "brother" in my cong. Subsequently, I was suffering from panic attacks and depression and had to attend a brain-injury out-patient clinic for over a year. During that time, I was assigned a talk, for which I declined....hmmm wonder why??? This elder called me up, and was very condescending when he said" perhaps you shouldn't even have your name on the list then, if you can't give this talk?" "This is the 2nd one you have turned down in 4 months" I told him to take my name off the list, and a few weeks later, i fazed right out. But never once, did they offer any support, or kind words for my family. They disgust me..When I told my brother, who at the time was an MS, he was livid and said this elder had no right to talk to me that way, but nothing was ever done about it, and he still operates the same way. Thank god I am no longer there for him to belittle. I do believe, one day, their little glass house will be shattered and they will pay for their dirty deeds.

    Dee

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