JWs And Ex-JWs--Do You Struggle With Depression Because You Were A JW?

by minimus 43 Replies latest jw friends

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  Billygoat

  Two elders I was very close to as family "friends" attempted to molest me. I was DFed for a sin that I went forward with. I was expecting mercy because I had a drinking problem and all they did was DF me. The only religion I'd ever really been around had abandoned me. In turn I believed that GOD abandoned me. My father pretty much disowned me because I was seeing a therapist for my drinking issues and other acting out behaviors. I was kicked out of the only family I'd ever had growing up. My parents left the town I was living in and I can count on two hands how many times they've contacted me in the last 14/15 years.

  So yes. I struggle with depression. I had very valid reasons to. It is not NEARLY as bad as it used to be though. I have realized my trigger points and what sets me off into depressive episodes. I can help avoid those by three things:

  1. talking immediately about why I'm depressed with my husband or other loved ones.
  2. eating only healthy foods and staying away from sugar. (This is a biggie for me. Sugar seems to exacerbate my negative mood!)
  3. find a healthy physical outlet like gardening, walking, or other hobbies.

  Just some little tricks that work for me. But when I do have a really bad several days or weeks and I'm in a depressive spiral, I don't hesitate to get a "tune-up" appointment with my psychiatrist. Even one session can get me boostered up again. I don't hesitate to get on meds if I need to either. The bad doesn't last forever if I just do what I need to do to take care of myself.

  Andi
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  moanzy

  I suffered from depression for almost my whole life. I grew up a JW and with all the other problems in our family besides our religion it isn't difficult to see why I suffered depression.

  Since leaving JW's I have experienced the most freedom I have ever had in my whole life. That has been my biggest relief. Also, since leaving I have gone through councelling for myself as well as I asked for help in learning healthy discipline and communication with my little girls. And then I also went on a mission to find truth, reading everything I could get my hands on about religions, its beginnings, JW's etc.

  Although I can't say I have found the truth, I have found bits of truth that I could replace what I lost. Losing your belief and family is a very huge loss. I found that I couldn't leave my life with such a huge void right in the middle of it. The more I read the more fulfilled I become and the less I feel I need my family. I miss them still and I believe that it is all an unnecessary tragedy, but there really is nothing that I can do to force them all to open their stupid little minds.

  Moanzy
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  Sparkplug

  Yes, much to my dislike, I suffer depression. I get it honest. It runs in my families crazy blood. Being a witness just exasterbated it. But so did a lot of other items including avoidance of the problem. Just because bad things happen to me did not make me depressed. It was simply a case of learning coping skills, being better informed of how depression works. Taking meds when the response to situations cannot be controled by me and my biggest battle is learning to relax.

  There are other family members of mine who go to therapy and go to therapy and go to therapy and never manage to live. I think therapy is living to them. Me personally..I think it is just another way to have someone else control my mind. I have gone to therapy and if it can be kept in its proper place as a way to have someone help you channel your thoughts and help you reach conclusions by thinking, then by yes by all means go to therapy. If it means that I have to have validation as a person by a therapist who is just another person, then I dont think I would be better off than by remaining depressed....for that is a pretty depressing plight to me.

  To anyone with depression, get the help you need and move on. To dwell on the fact...I mean DWELL on the fact you have depression is a sure fire way to stay in it. Treat it....and keep living. Living is much more fun and fullfilling.
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  Markfromcali

  It would also be senseless to cross-post the same message on every thread regardless of whether or not it's on topic, and a good way for people to tune you out and to get kicked off.
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  Sparkplug
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  moanzy

  Joshua1914

  "everyone must work out their OWN salvation". Exactly why we don't need a religion to act like they are ticket to salvation.

  Many of us who were JW weren't totally aware of this BASIC truth in the bible and now are suffering from things like depression partly because of an overbearing religion trying to hijack our personality and concience. Sorry to burst your JW truth bubble!!!!

  Moanzy
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  Sparkplug

  What do you bet his/her PIN number at the bank and all else is 1914?
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  moanzy

  Oh probably sparkplug!

  I just don't get it. I was raised a Jdub my whole life. My dad was an elder and I regular pioneered and am very aware of what JWs believe. Does Joshua1914 really believe that everyone here just doesn't know what JW's believe.

  That is so Naive! And I can personally call up my elder brother-in-law and my elders- wife sister and my elder dad and my regular pioneer mom if I have any questions. I just don't wish heap on any more abuse on myself.

  Thanks Joshua1914 for wanting to help us all even if you have to twist the scriptures a little. "Each one must work out his OWN salvation" Pay attention as this is a very important scripture!!!! It is not up to any religion to save us. We each will have to answer for ourselves.

  Moanzy
• 

  Samuel Thorsen

  One prominet elder i my country, known as brother Furuli to some on this board, made a survey on mental health among JWs a couple of years ago.

  The survey concluded that JWs had LESS mental problems the other non JWs!!!!!! Can you belive it!!

  Yes of course. But the secret is the population he used. Furili (and a JW psyciatrist) investigated a number of PUBLICHERS. You know. People who do field service and drop of a report after every month.. He didn't, or wouldn't realize, that lot of JWs with problems stops doing that service things and thet made his survey a very good one for the WTS.

  Just like a friend of mine, who was grown up in the troof and a baptized publishers for many years, he killed himself because of heavy mental problems last year. But that would not affect the statistics of the WTS because he stopped reporting hes servuce more than 6 months before he killed himself.

  So the guy who killed himself was not a JW. JWs do not commit suicide ever.
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  minimus

  I know of active JWs that committed suicide.