Oh my bad. eventhough that is 80% of the reason people have computers
Stupid Analogies/Illustrations/examples you hear dubs say over and over
by doodle-v 57 Replies latest jw friends
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ljwtiamb
How 'bout this one:
"Brother Franz was a Rhodes scholar and speaks (100 billion) languages!"
OR:
"All of the 'Questions from Readers' are from anointed ones!"
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ljwtiamb
Oooh! Oooh!!
Here's one:
"Disfellowshipped ones should be thankful for Jeh's mercy. If they were in Israel, we would stone them!"
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Outaservice
IN TIMES OF PERSECUTION IF THE BROTHERS MISSED A MEETING THEY WOULD NOT KNOW WHERE THE NEXT ONE WOULD BE HELD! SO NEVER MISS A MEETING OR THE SAME COULD HAPPEN TO YOU!
WHAT? I WOULD SAY 'HALLELUJAH', CAN'T FIND THEM ANYMORE!
OUTASERVICE (NOW MISSING ALL THE MEETINGS)
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jula71
I can't believe no one mentioned the "rowboat"!!! Drifting from the truth is like a man sitting in a rowboat that is drifting on the ocean, it drifts slowly without being noticed untill you are out of the sight of land (Borg).
But someone did mention the worst one......5 meetings are like your 5 fingers on a hand...you need them all.....
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vitty
But doesnt this show we are UNITED, we must have the truth we all hear the same thing wherever we live.
Whether you live in a mud hut or in western country, we all know about the DENTED PAN, the FIVE FINGERS or CROSSING THE CROCODILE INFESTED WATERS TO GO TO AN ASSEMBLE .
whew---------------and we all know the internet is evil.
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tijkmo
at a recent assembly illustration was given of how someone who was drowning was thrown a lifeline from a passing boat...he would grab hold of it with both hands and get pulled to safety..that what jws offer to worldlings and wrongdoers
i thought yeah i was drowning and i kept swimming up to your boat and shouting on you to help me and you would look over the side and see it was me and get a big stick and shove me under the water again..happened so many times i got exhausted and gave up...you bastards
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doodle-v
I was sent this "encouraging experience" via email
Dear Brothers please read the following experience that happened to me. I am a third year broadcast journalism student at Ryerson University in Toronto. One of the classes that I am required to take is called Research and Story Editing and is a practical journalism course that teaches us how to do investigative journalism and how to present accurate statistics.
The class is three hours and the first half is a practical lesson while the second half usually consists of a guest speaker coming in from an actual news program to speak about real 'on the job' experience.
In the first half of the class our professor had discussed how to represent statistics accurately to the public. For example, if I were to only interview 2 people and 1 of them had cancer I could not accurately say that 50% of all Canadians have cancer. (This will relate later on.)
During the break I went to the bathroom and came back to find our speaker for the second half had already begun. She was a producer from CBC's The Fifth Estate and was presenting one of the episodes she had worked on.Of the hundreds of possible episodes the one she chose to show was the one she worked on about child sex abuse in the Jehovah's Witness religion. I walked into the room as the tape was being played on the television. I saw the Brooklyn buildings and immediately knew what the show was about because I had seen parts of it in the past.
My first reaction was to leave because I felt so nervous since I knew that the report was totally one-sided. I immediately prayed and realized that I had to stay because I wanted to at least say something to the 25 students in the class who were getting this biased information. Some of whom knew I was a Witness.
I sat through the entire hour long episode repeatedly praying to Jehovah to give me the strength to defend his name at the end of the program. The episode was very slanted and biased and they had apostates refer to the Witness organization as a 'Pedophile's paradise'. They also showed the case of the woman from Shelburne who sued the society for allegedly mishandling her child abuse case when she brought it to the elders in her hall.
At the end of the program the producer continued to talk and she passed around a sheet of 18 or so names of people that she said were abused as children within the Jehovah's Witnesses organization. She said she found these people to make sure that she wasn't just exploiting one or two cases but that there was more.
Finally, I mustered up the courage to speak and I raised my hand. I told her and the class that I was one of Jehovah's Witnesses and that I felt her report was one-sided. She took a step back and all eyes turned to me I told her that she made the Jehovah's Witnesses look very bad and I said: "The Catholic Church has been involved in severe scandals where their own priests have abused hundreds of children yet I do not go around saying that all Catholics are bad people. But the way you portrayed Jehovah's Witnesses was as though the organization as a whole is evil."
I further said that as a lifelong Jehovah's Witness, if I were ever abused I would feel no pressure to not go to the authorities. I said that the elders are simply there to assist you as would a priest in the Church. I said I didn't know enough about the elders in the specific scenarios but, just as the Society acknowledged, the elders are not perfect and some may have mishandled a certain case; but I stated that the majority of them are good men who only want to help others in their congregations.
I also told her that we had just been discussing how to accurately portray statistics and I asked her if she knew that there were over 100,000 Jehovah's Witnesses in Canada alone and I said the fact that she found 18 people who had been abused hardly gave her the right to allow the apostate man to say that the organization is a 'pedophile's paradise'. I said that 18 of 100,000 plus Witnesses is less than .0001 %.
She then acknowledged that she understood my point and said that maybe they were a bit harsh on the Witnesses by including that quote. Further, I asked her why she only showed the beginning of the trial about the lady from Shelburne and not the outcome. She said that they had to go to air before the verdict was reached. I said that the judge had basically dismissed the case and I said that she should have raised the point as to why she was suing the society instead of the real culprit- her father! She said that the woman got a 'hollow' victory since she was awarded $5,000 dollars.
Anyway, after the class one girl came up to me and told me that my point about the Catholic priest was very good and she agreed with me. Another classmate said that he agreed with me that it was too biased and I was able to further witness to him. And the next day in class nobody was rude or mean to me- in fact they were all very friendly. My teacher even commended me at the end of the year as being a good student and said that she would provide me with a reference anytime I needed one.
After that class I was so happy that I had stayed instead of leaving and shying away from defending Jehovah's name. Although it was so difficult to force myself to sit down I really felt a sense of calm after praying to Jehovah. And once I began speaking it was as though I was not nervous at all. Jehovah really helped me with his holy spirit and I was able to turn a totally negative situation into an effective witness. And the producer was also able to hear an opposite viewpoint that I'm sure she had never bothered to think about.
I thought my experience might help others who may feel scared or worried to identify themselves as Jehovah's Witnesses. As I learned, even after the most defamatory remarks, with Jehovah's help (2 Corinthians 4:7) it is possible to defend his name and even have a positive outcome.
Please feel free to use this in any regard or to contact me for any further details or clarifications.
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MidwichCuckoo
The persistent phrase I hear is how great it is to be persecuted (and JW's being the MOST persecuted in the WORLD) and hated (just as Jesus was) because that PROVES we have the Truth.
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drwtsn32
doodle: