by Gwen 20 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
Gwen:
In some cases it may be necessary for family members to communicate with DF'd family members, however it but the watchtower society advises family members to keep it to an extreme minimum but usually it is left to individual family members to draw their own boundaries of what a minimum is. Some, if not most, don't even follow that and just treat their relatives like any other DF'd person.
Hi Gwen,
Welcome to JWD!You might want to check out these web pages:
Jehovah's Witnesses: A Critical Analysis
These two contain many links to important information regarding the Watchtower Society.
NewLight2's Links Page
Johannes Greber's Home Page
Here is one that deals with Mind Control and Cults
Mind Control - The BITE Model
Hi Gwen and welcome.
Regarding disassociating; my wife and I left together in 1989. We sent a long letter to the local elders, the Society, and the JW branch of her family. About two weeks later I ran into one of my former friends in a grocery store. He treated me like I was invisible.
We both got pulled into it as adults. My wife because some family members she loved and deeply respected had become Witnesses. I started studying my senior year in college. I had little religious background, and that I was really learning about the Bible, and it gave me some close friends during a difficult time in my life. Oh well.
They don't tell you about things like disfellowshipping until you're so far in you can't get back out.
Gwen
I am married to an inactive, unbaptized publisher. I don't have anything against the organization per say, but I've had some time to take a look at the practices and consider them very carefully. I've come to the conclusion that it's not something that I want to get deeply into...as in to the point where I become baptized and subject to possible disfellowshipping. A lot of JW's will tell you that people get disfellowshipped for adultery, and they even assume that is the case when they hear someone's name announced. I don't know if this is true. All I know is that I am politically active, get involved in campaigns and grassroots politics, and vote in every election. Even though they SAY it's a matter of concious (sp?) whether to decide to vote, it appears to be something that is evil enough to mark you as being weak or whatever. Because of this, and because I generally don't like when people try to tell me what to do, I've decided to just maintain a friendly relation to members of the JW's and family members. If I remain on the outside, I stand a better chance of keeping my family members and friends that are JW's in contact. It's ironic, I must stay out in order to stay in, lol.
Hubby on the other hand, has a problem that bothers me. He cannot conform to the rules and regulations regarding door to door work, so he will probably never progress. That wouldn't be so bad, but I know he feels a deep obligation to work on getting baptized. It's a conflict within himself, and I feel sorry for him. It bothers me that HE is feeling that it's his fault for not "feeling the joy" and "desire" to do door to door work. While I have not gone door to door with JW's, I have gone door to door advocating and asking for support for gay marriages...which is probably just as popular as a JW coming to your door. It is VERY difficult even for a normally outgoing person such as myself, so I can't imagine what my hubby goes through when he's mostly in his little quiet shy shell. I've offered to dunk him in baptism myself in a pool, but he says it's not the same.
garybus - you crack me up!
Welcome to the board Gwen! For someone not too familiar with the Witnesses you seem to have things pretty much figured out (Good for YOU!). They could never draw someone like you in - too much critical thinking, too many questions, they don't tolerate that.
Most of us who came in while adults were gradually indoctrinated. It's a process (i.e. brainwashing). Many of us woke up because of nagging doubts about the doctrines and flip-flopping rules and regs. and failed prophecies.
Though some people are disfellowshipped for immorality like myself, they really wanted to get out anyway. Just to live a 'normal' life.
Welcome...
If you go to this website: http://quotes.watchtower.ca/DF_DA.htm you will see several quotes from the JW literature itself explaining how DFing and DAing works.
Remember as you read this, this is their spin on how good a thing DFing is in protecting the congregation and helping the sinner. You'll notice that the attitudes toward DFing have changed some over the years. Notice the dates of the quotes and you'll see how they try to sweeten the message in later quotes.
You're initial reaction to the JWs at the KH funeral is about in line with the average JW congregation. Each congregation is like a commune or a society within itself, removed from the real world for all practical purposes.
The average JW are actually decent people trying to please God in what they think is the best way. Unfortunately they have allowed themselves to be controlled by a corporation hiding behind the veil of the name of religion. This corporation seeks to keep their followers isolated from the world so they can better control them to further their cause...selling books, receiving donations and pulling in money.
Thanks for all the feedback. I'm slowly working my way through the links posted here, and checking out profiles, personal homepages, best of, etc. I am still fascinated and baffled at how this could all work so well for the Watchtower. My inclination would be to believe that it is not natural for human beings to shun their own kind, particularly their own children. I'd think that as soon as an organization requires a parent to do such a thing, the structure would begin to crumble, as the parent refuses, is DF'd, and those close to the DF'd parties slowly get out or get thrown out for not being able or willing to shun their loved ones. That's what is so fascinating to me about this... it seems to defy nature. Undercover, I found myself wondering what the Watchtower's real motivation is and I couldn't figure out how a non-profit organization would be SO concerned with keeping its members that it would go to such extreme lengths as emotionally terrorizing them. I wasn't aware that the WTC makes so much money selling books and other materials. Can anyone point me to a link that explains some of the JW terminology? I'm still a bit confused on some of the terms, like 'publisher', indoctrination, etc, and when and how one becomes baptized, etc. Thanks again!
Canada shunning link . . .
http://users.uniserve.com/~renford/parlimen.htm
Here's a classic:
Glossary of American English Hacker Theocratese
http://www.ashelf.com/wordlists/e/eec/www/=A.html
Gwen, welcome. Here is a short version of my story:
Born, raised JW. 14 years of abusive marriage. Kept it to myself. One night, cops arrested him, charged him and he was eventually convicted. Full confession to the elders BUT he was only publically reproved (slap on the wrist). After we were seperated, I met someone, fell in love, married. I was disfellowshipped for this.
The minute my mother and bro (JWs) found out that I was even leaving the marriage (regardless of the circumstances) they shunned me. After I was df'ed, a strict shunning was imposed and 4 years later, still is. They even shun my children because they are not JWs.
If you question, disagree, or doubt that the JWs do not have the truth AND make this public, you can be df'ed and lose everyone.
There are ppl all over that have lost children, parents, siblings, you name it, due to disfellowshipping over really stupid stupid none of anyones f***ing business stuff.
Jez
