I don't think JH has this issue. But he said what his reasons included. I'm certainly not judging here. I just am projecting as to what might probably happen.
Recovery-----How Goes The Battle?
by minimus 36 Replies latest jw friends
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FMZ
JH... everything for a reason.
FMZ
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moanzy
My recovery is great! The only problem is I really don't know what to believe about God.
I'm still searching and searching and searching and although at least I don't have to put up with being told what to believe, I still can't find anything concrete.
At least I don't have the guilt anymore.
Moanzy
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Dawn
(JH) - take your time - do what you feel is best.
I went back after I was DF'd the first time. I understand completely - it is hard, especially if you were raised in the "truth" or have been in a very long time. It's more than just a church - it is a way of life. And we humans are never comfortable with such drastic change - even if it is for the best.
As for Minimus question - How goes the battle? I believe, that at this point in my life, I can finally say - it is done. The battle is over. It was tough - but worth it. I wouldn't wish this battle on anyone, and yet, I value the lessons that I learned from it. Here are 10 of those lessons:
- Guilt with a purpose is a good thing - it's called a conscience. Guilt for no reason is not - it's called mind control
- If 10 people in a room all completely agree on an issue of politics or religion, it's only because one person in that room has power over the other 9
- The Armageddon nightmares will begin to subside the longer you are away from the "borg" - until one day you realize they are gone. However, the dreams about being caught in public in your underwear don't!
- Door to door ministry is a waste of time. Spend the day with your kids and you'll both benefit more in the long run.
- It hurts to loose relationships with people you care about. It's ok to cry.
- Stick up for yourself and set boundaries. You deserve to be treated with respect.
- Healing takes a lot of time and a lot of patience.
- God will not be mad if you throw out the Watchtower and read the Bible instead.
- Demons don't live inside of garage sale items. The fear of them is a phobia, a seed planted and encouraged by a high control group.
- Truth - REAL TRUTH - will always be there. It can withstand any amount of scrutiny. Don't be afraid to question, to research, to scrutinize.
A while back I was visiting with a friend and realized, through the conversation, that I no longer identified myself as an x-JW. Somewhere along the way of healing it just got dropped. It's no longer "who I am". Not that I have forgotten about being a JW - that will always be with me, . It's just that - I now think of it as something I once did, but it's not who I am now.
So I guess - after 15 years, I can finally say - it's done. The battle is finished.
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LouBelle
Dawn: Your words are extremely comforting. Esp. when you say the battle is done - it's finished. Reminds me of when Jesus died - that is exactly what he saide "it's finished". Good on you.
Moanzy: I'm very recent in leaving the organisation and the indoctrination behind. I did go to a born again church though and of course everything they taught naturally went against what I held to be true. We have a hellofa lot of UNLEARNING to do. I have thrown away most of my literature away - I've kept bible/inspired scrip & the cd. Reason for that is to make comparissons. I've got myself a KIV bible and for the first time am reading it with an open heart and an open mind and hun I can tell you that It's mind blowing.
And how is this for "concern". My mother left the organisation about 8 years ago, not because of doctrine or anything like or because she felt it was a cult - she wanted to go out and live her life, which she duly did. In all that time no one bothered to phone her, contact her NOTHING. Now that I'm about to be disfellowshiped (pretty sure that this will happen) She gets a call from an elder asking how she is, and if she would like to come to the hall for a chat to see how she has been doing. My mother knows how I was deceived into thinking I was supposed to be going for a chat and it turned out as a committee case so she says "no thanks, you decieved Louise that way, it won't happen again" She was pretty straight forward and told him that he should be truthful about his motive for calling.
We've both decided that it's a waste of our time to give them any more of our time, as we both know we will not be going back.
We started fantasising about nailing their falsehoods to the kingdom hall doors, or storming into a meeting and grabbing the microphones and let them know they were blind. We had a good laugh.
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benito
The battle has finished over a year ago. One thing that scared me a lot was the rumours you could hear while you were active JWs. You always heard about that brother who stopped attending meetings and ended up taking drugs or the disfellowshipped sister who went to jail and that kind of things. It was like everybody who left "the truth" had to live an unhappy life until their death. I know that these are a kind of urban legends, but when I stopped attending meetings I was a bit afraid of feeling pushed by the devil to drurgs, or to steal money from people or to rape old ladies or a craziness like that. After several months, I laughed at myself for giving any credibility to these rumours.
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kls
JH is just a little confused right now but he will make the best decision for him .