While a JW, Did You Ever Let On That You Were "Going Apostate"? (page 2)

Honesty

You know you are in good company when they start saying 'Chief Apostate'.

Honesty

I think that's Simon's title.

He earned it.

freedom96

To just a couple of people I expressed disappointment in the way things are done, which would labeled me as spiritually weak, or stumbled.

Other than that, I kept my mouth shut.

I will still visit some witnesses that I grew up with when I am in town, but no one asks me my position within the hall. I amuse myself thinking how they have no idea that they have an apostate in their home!

blondie

Nope.

Did mention once that Russell was associated with the Second Adventists for awhile just about the time articles in the WT magazines came out on Storrs and Grews.

If the WT said it and I repeat it, can I be an apostate? Depends on who you ask, I guess.

minimus

Blondie, I agree with you. I LOVED to bring out the real history of the WBTS, esp. when I gave talks on the Proclaimers book.

Rod P

I kinda snuck up on them.

The first thing I did was ask one of the brothers about the Soul doctrine. I asked the question "If when we die, we go out of existence, and then later get resurrected, what is it that gets resurrected. If Jehovah makes a whole new body from the dust of the earth, and then implants His perfect memory of Me and what I had experienced while alive, then it seems to me that all Jehovah has done is made a duplicate of me. "Me" went out of existence when I died. (Years later I discovered this concept is called "cloning".

The reaction of the brother was to come up to me and feel the top of my head. He was looking for horns. Heh, heh!

Then I started to question the whole notion of relying on the Bible to teach me the Truth from Jehovah. I knew all about the fact that you needed the WBTS/GB to interpret the Bible. But that was not the message we were handing out in the field service. We were always telling householders to read the Bible, and see that Christendom was not really teaching the truths that are in the Bible. So I began to open my mouth and raise questions with a number of fellow JW's about the problem of biblical interpretation, and how experts in Hebrew and Greek did not agree with the WBTS in their interpretation of various scriptures and doctrinal teachings. And so how could we be really sure what the Bible really teaches? Then the various JW brothers and sisters would always respond with the argument that the Faithful and Discreet Slave (the GB) was being used by Jehovah in these last days to help us to understand the truth from the bible. And "By their fruits you shall know my disciples." And so only Jehovah's Witnesses bear the true Christian fruits by which we can recognize the one true religion on planet earth.

I found this whole argument to be circular and unconvincing. But in talking about it, questioning this whole notion, it made the brothers and sisters quite concerned over me having such doubts. Then I began studying Catholicism (i.e. Apostolic Succession) and Mormonism (Restoration of the Gospel in the latter days, including the restoration of the Priesthood, which was the Authority to act and speak for God, and to interpret the Scriptures).

As my faith rapidly dwindled, and my doubts began to consume me, and I was actually converting to Mormonism, I was also experiencing deep emotional trauma about the prospects of losing the relationships I had been enjoying with my JW extended family and friends. Then they began to put pressure on me to get back on track, and to remove the influences that were shipwrecking my faith in the JW teachings. They told me to burn all the Catholic and Mormon books I had acquired for my research.

One weekend they set up a bonfire in the yard, near the farmhouse, and I had to bring out all the books, and one by one put them into the fire and watch them burn. I felt like a lamb being brought to the slaughter, and I passively obeyed "for the greater good of the family", but tears rolled down my cheeks as I watched the burning. It felt so wrong, and no better than all the book burning that had been carried out by the Catholics in centuries past.

Before I went thru with this burning, I asked how this was any better than the Catholic Church, who do not allow their members to read literature from other faiths, which is exactly what the Watchtowers and Awakes criticized in the literature about religious intolerance. And here I was expected to behave the same way. Their excuse was, that while the Watchtower stand was still true, it was also true that what I was reading from other Churches was actually "wrecking my faith", and so for me, this was what I needed to do.

After that, when I tried to carry on being a "good little, believing JW", I found my heart just wasn't in it. After a few months I resumed my studies outside the JW religion, and ended up being converted to Mormonism. And that's when all hell broke loose, and I got disfellowshipped for apostasy, producing a divided marriage, and ultimately a marriage that ended in divorce, with three daughters in the wake of the disaster.

Rod P.

p.s. My years as a Mormon produced similar results. Now I belong to no religion, but still believe in Spirituality and God, but not with any organized religion.

hillbilly

Hey ! who said I'm apostate?

Sh*t! A serious rumor like that could get me in a real jam....

~Hill

Elsewhere

*** To the toon of Going Quackers *** (Donald Duck Version)

I'm goin' postate (quack quack quack!)
and you can come along
I'm goin' postate (quack quack quack!)
so sing this little song, oh yeah, sing this little song.

bennyk

Absolutely. But I tried to be discreet and only speak with one person at a time (two-Witness rule for JC lynching probably doesn't apply re: "apostates" [oh, well]) and only with close friends or relatives, who might see their way around a command to "commence shunning!!!!" (still risky, but so far, so good...).

While a JW, Did You Ever Let On That You Were "Going Apostate"?

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