a little background.......
been fading for more than a year now. I think i have done a good job of transitioning out of the borg. I am now comfortable with many of the taboos i was raised to fear. i think my self esteem is coming back from the state of shock i felt when i left.
when i left, i felt the "small fish in a big ocean" feeling, it seemed like everybody was going in a different direction at 100 mph. and while i've come to grips with the realization that we are in control of our own destinies, it also pains me in some way. I don't know what i am saying, i'm just rambling !!
anyway back to the point at hand, does anybody feel like god (jehovah) is looking down critically at everything they do? I wish so badly that i could just experience everday situations as they are rather than said situations significance in some grand biblical drama. If i didn't have to worry about fear of disapproving god, i know my social skills would improve 10 fold. and thats what i really want. i want to be friendlier, more open, honest, more outgoing, more laidback, go with the flow.
question: when you encounter someone you have never met before, how do you view that person? do you feel that you have a natural intuition about people, or do you give that person a blank slate, do you care at all, do you try to get along with everybody