Are we like jilted lovers? (page 2)

jaffacake

looking from the outside, I agree, but with a slight adjustment to the analogy. I would have thought that You folks jilted the Org rather than the other way round, even if you were DF, as IPSec said. But you jilted the Org only because you found out that this 'partner' [the org] had been unfaithful to you throughout all those years whilst you dedicated yourselves to it. Your analysis still holds very true.

Satanus

Good thought, fatgreek. I like the jaffa model. The wt promised, but never delivered. It preached certain standards, but was unfaithful in keeping to them. When it finds that it's lovers are beginning to remove the veil, to see it in true light, it brutally turns on those it claims to love.

S

purplesofa

I think what makes leaving the org rather than being jilted by a lover for me is the death sentence. We are told we will die and not get everlasting life. That in essence it is all over. We do not have God's blessing anymore, so every aspect of our lives is effected. It is the ulitimate rejection.

If we have come to terms with this, then the trauma each one of us experiances is different at varying degrees.

For me when I was DF, the stress was almost unbearable. Now that I have walked away, it was my choice, yes it is a change in my life which causes stress, but the core of me has not been destroyed and I have moved on rather quickly.

purps

heathen

I think the thing that saddened me was that I believe in God and what I keep finding are those people that claim Godly devotion but turn into the wolf in sheeps clothing . I was never a dub but was convinced they were telling the truth at one point and that they really cared and wanted to help and share and do all those things I read about in the bible but what you get are petty self important back biting dip f@#$' s .

Honesty

I jilted them and found another love. The emotional and physical torment I experienced was because Mother turned out to be a spiritual prostitute who will go to bed with anyone to get her way. She is in bed with the NYC politicos, the Un, the ECHR and many more. This was totally devastating to learn because Mother was so kind and benevolent. She took care of me when times were rough. And then I find out she sells herself to the highest bidders. I feel used and abused but I brought it on myself because I trusted the whore.

luna2

...but later as we started clocking what had happened we realised we had been taken for a ride, and we only felt anger that we had been duped

Katiek...this is true. I guess that's what I'm dealing with now. There's anger at God, anger at the WTS and, anger and sorrow directed at myself. I chose this. I thought this was real. Where did my brain go?

This is what I felt after my marriage starting going sour too. I was angry at my ex for not knowing his own mind and making promises that he quickly came to regret and didn't want to keep, but mostly I was angry at ME for not being smarter. There were a lot of things that I ignored or hoped would change (fatal, fatal reasoning) with time. Seems like I learned relatively nothing from this experience and did the very same thing when the dubs came along.

Both of these major life decisions are over and done with now...I've lived with my choices as best I could, got out when it became necessary for survival, and tried to mop up the mess that was left. Most of the hot anger and pain I felt when things first fell apart is gone and I don't walk around with my hands fisted or a scowl on my face by any means. I'm a relatively happy person and much more at peace these days.

What bothers me now is that I don't have a clue in the world of how to avoid being scammed in the future (both in personal relationships and in other things like religion or business) other than to be suspicious of everything and everybody. I worry that my decision-making abilities are so weak and I'm so flawed that I might not be able to make intelligent choices. It's kind of awful not being able to trust yourself.

Fatfreek

Can I renege on my original proposal?

Okay then, I will -- sort of -- based on all your comments of immense wisdom. Mother, instead, is far worse than an unfaithful lover or spouse. She has, over those with remaining family members, commanding power . The family members and friends, in most cases at the time, choose to remain under mother's powerful control and her every command.

True, I chose her despite the tender age of 15, but that's really a moot point. I did, indeed do the choosing at both ends. My self-description at exit time was departer -- hers, apostate. But it was her unfaithfulness that motivated me.

Are we like jilted lovers?