Dating a JW

by pooka 14 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

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  Honesty

  I was married to a JW for 10 years. I was absolutely miserable. Our children were miserable. The only one happy was the ex because she enjoyed invoking her fucked up beliefs on every one around her. My neighbors were so glad to see her leave the area they wanted to have a celebration. It is a miracle she wasn't arrested for theft, trespassing, etc. because of some of the shit she would pull in the name of Joe Hoba her WT god. BTW, I was a JW for 15 years until I figured out it is a corrupt and demonic cult. Run as fast as you can. The dude is not being truthful with you because if you were to marry him he would become so controlling and self-righteous he would make the Pharisees of Jesus' day look like angels.
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  pooka

  Thanks for the Believer comment. I do use that all the time when we talk about it. I think I should tell everyone that we only keep the relationship from other JWs. All his non JW friends and of course mine all know about the relationship. His kids also know and like me. (I bake treats that they usually wouldnt have.) I truly do think that we have been working on this realationship already for 3 years and it seems to be working.

  He is a weak JW and his Father is the "Grand Pooba" in his congregation so his dad rules the family. That is probably the only reason that we are secretly dating. There are also 3 other family members that are not JWs, one of them the parents have not spoken to them in years. So I'm also working with a dysfunctional family too.

  I must love him alot to deal with that too.
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  luna2

  I must love him alot to deal with that too.

  I guess you must.

  When you are in a relationship (flawed tho it may be), it's hard to look at it objectively. Hiding you from the JW side of his life is huge, but if you are willing to be kept as a guilty secret, that is your choice.

  Perhaps if you find out more about what JW's believe and the fallacies in their religion, you will be able to help your man break free. Who knows? ...it could happen.

  I wish you all the best and hope this works out for you.
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  Dragonlady76

  I think I should tell everyone that we only keep the relationship from other JWs. All his non JW friends and of course mine all know about the relationship. His kids also know and like me. (I bake treats that they usually wouldnt have.) I truly do think that we have been working on this realationship already for 3 years and it seems to be working.

  To a JW only other JW's matter. The religion cult takes importance over anything or anyone and is all en-compassing, touching every single aspect of his life, it's really much more important or bigger than you think or he lets on. Your love for him is tainting your reasoning or common sense.

  Pooka, I would suggest you tell him that he needs to come clean with his family about you, and if he does not or refuses, then you need to walk away fromthis relationship. That may help him see how much he loves you, OR it just will show you, that you will never come before the cult. I'm sorry the news is not better, I wish you all the best of luck.

  DL76
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  Grace

  Pooka, run like hell the other way. Oh, how I wish I had! Things get worse after you're married, much worse. Not better. Remember this.

  Grace to you