Reason for getting disfellowshipped.

by greendawn 55 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Grace

  I DA'ed myself by a simple letter (with a huge Christmas stamp) I wrote (giving no reason) in early December of 2001. I went back to the church I was raised in very suddenly on November 18, 2001, after knowing I MUST not accept doctrines blindly anymore after 9/ll.

  Here's the clincher: they could have announced it to the congregation in the two weeks my husband (still an active JW) and I were on holiday in Florida for our 10th wedding anniversary; instead, they decided to wait until my husband was back. They announced it just before he was to give a talk in the school in early January.

  Oh, yeah! This organization is just overflowing with "love", isn't it?

  Grace to you.
• 

  Quentin

  Out thirty years. About ten years ago sent DA letter to Brooklyn. My publishers card was still in some name forgotten KH in Dallas, but, through my father, who had returned to the WT, they found me. A couple of J boys came around and asked about the letter. Told them I ment every word of it, they left and I went on with my life. My dad shunned me after that, it's the one regret I have about sending the letter. He died about four years later.
• 

  kittyeatzjdubs

  The only reasons that one is disfellowshipped is for one not having a Christian attitude or heart.
  

  It is not for or from a particular sin. But it is from one's reaction to that sin such as non-repentance

  
  

  
  tell me grissom....does an elder rubbing his crotch in the corner as they try to get me to confess to premarital sex count as a christian attitude?

  you strike me as one of those people who has his/her @ss so far up the WTBS, that they can't see what's going on around them...is it a christian attitude to suddenly have my family snatched away from me b/c i sinned? is it christian for a mother to kick her daughter out at 11 at night with no idea whether she'll have somewhere to stay??? luckily, my ''wordly'' boyfriend took me in and i've never been happier. i thought wordly people didn't know true love grissom...

  i was repentent for what i did to get dsf'd...but i can't rip my heart out of my chest and show it to them...how do they know if you truly have a repentent heart grissom??? b/c obviously crying until i was sick and begging them to forgive me wasn't repentent enough...how did they know what was in my heart??? does jehobah shoot them a holy email and say, ''btw...jobeth's not repentant. disfellowship her.''

  no luv, jojo
• 

  jeanniebeanz

  The only reasons that one is disfellowshipped is for one not having a Christian attitude or heart.

  So, you read hearts now, huh? lol

  You are a fool if you believe that heart condition has anything to do with their arbitrary decisions. It is simply not true.

  People are disfellowshipped for all kinds of reasons. Something as simple as asking a question that the BOE cannot answer and not accepting the old, "well if you were faithfull you'd believe so you must be apostate," to attempting to blow up a Kingdom Hall.

  Many times it is a matter of the local BOE setting out to get rid of someone they don't like; usually a compassionate person who will not be unkind in their dealings with 'the flock'. My father was an elder, and so was my ex, so don't lie and think you'll get away with it; I've seen this first hand.

  Jean
• 

  ColdRedRain

  I never was baptized, so I never did get DF'ed.

  I simply stopped attending because I started thinking objetively and it mortified me how the JW disfellowshipping proccess is used to silence "apostates" in their organization, which made me think that disfellowshippings aren't always due to "unrepentent attitudes".

  I also got sick of the judgemental behavior that existed in the hall. I'm glad to see some things never change, Grissom.
• 

  mjarka911

  Never DF'd - I researched and DA'd myself. Left on my terms. Good riddance!
• 

  MerryMagdalene

  I'm not sure what the official reason was for my DFing as I was not told. But I can take a good guess.

  I had stopped going to meetings several years prior and no longer considered myself a JW but did not really advertise this fact. I lived in a different town from where I grew up. Had minimal contact with my JW family. No contact with old JW acquaintances. I don't remember the Elders ever seeking me out to try to help me and, in fact, refused me help when I initially asked for it earlier on.

  I had a difficult marriage for 7+ years. Then we were in a severe car accident, after which we seperated. Then divorced. I moved into my own place and started my own business back in the town where I'd grown up. An elder there, who had known me from childhood, called me to ask if he could stop by to see me. I thought, wow, they really do care about all I've been through. When he showed up, however, there were 2 other elders with him. He explained this was to protect his reputation and mine (a man and woman not being alone together). I still didn't realize this was a JC (Judicial Committee, not Jesus Christ), even when they started questioning me (ee-dee-ut!).

  Turns out they were primarily concerned with what negative effect I might have on my mother's spiritual health since I no longer considered myself a Witness, and that my JW ex wouldn't be able to re-marry "in the truth" unless I confessed to fornication. I wearily said fine, you can tell him he's free to re-marry then. They started to ask me more intimate/personal questions in that regard but I said twas none of their business. They got red-faced, asked me to write a DA letter to the cong, and left.

  Not wanting to lose my family, I wrote an anti-DA letter instead, telling them why I felt I was no threat to anyone. They didn't buy it and Dfed me in absentia. Presumably for fornication.

  They will never know how sorry I am for the wrongs I have done because (1) they have never asked me, and (2) it's still none of their business.

  ~Merry
• 

  Goldminer

  I'm not df'd or da'd,I just don't attend meetings anymore.I don't claim to be a jw and I've written a list of 30 questions that some elders have seen through my wife.Nobody's talked to me yet.

  I have the same attitude as uncle Gary B.,if they come after me,I'll disfellowship them for teaching lies as "truth".

  Goldminer
• 

  Dragonlady76

  An elder there, who had known me from childhood, called me to ask if he could stop by to see me. I thought, wow, they really do care about all I've been through. When he showed up, however, there were 2 other elders with him. He explained this was to protect his reputation and mine (a man and woman not being alone together). I still didn't realize this was a JC (Judicial Committee, not Jesus Christ), even when they started questioning me (ee-dee-ut!).

  Merry,

  Couldn't he just tell you the truth from the get go? What a slime ball.

  my JW ex wouldn't be able to re-marry "in the truth" unless I confessed to fornication. I wearily said fine, you can tell him he's free to re-marry then. They started to ask me more intimate/personal questions in that regard but I said twas none of their business.

  So what? that's the ex's problem not yours and the gall to even ask you to confess to fornication after divorce is preposterous!

  DL76
• 

  kazar

  I had stopped attending meetings for years and was eventually disfellowshipped. I had married a non-JW. I had confided in a "sister" I was very close to that I had been reassessing my beliefs and I came to the conclusion that I did not want to live forever. What was unspoken by me was that I did not want to live under the penalty of eternal life with judgmental people who had no individuality or talent. The "sister" reported it to the CO and I was hauled before the Judicial Committee and bingo! DF'd. I tried reinstatement a couple of times but could not stand being around them in the Kingdom Hall. So I faded.

  Grissom, I will never justify anything I did. No apologies, excuses, etc. I don't care, no, I don't care (set to the sheet music).