Faith Healing the Un-sick

by jeanniebeanz 15 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • jeanniebeanz
    jeanniebeanz

    Yesterday, a woman who identified herself as 'Christian' told me that she had been faith healed of an illness. I asked her what it was and she said 'diabetes'. I asked which type she had. She said, "I don't know which type it was."

    I expressed my surprise that she could have such a serious illness and not remember what the doctor had told her it was. I also asked if she had to take shots or if a combination of pills and diet had controlled it. She said that she had never been to a doctor, but a preacher in her church, United Pentecostal, had called her out of the congregation and after praying for her had rid her of her diabetes. She didn't even know she had it, and 'was so thankful to the Lord that she had been healed in time'.

    I didn't have the heart, or the bad manners, to point out her flawed thinking. However, this is the same type of blind faith that the witnesses have in the FDS theory. I guess they do not have the market cornered on gullibility...

    I'm dying here...

    J

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere

    Gawd... how STUPID does one have to be to fall for that?

    Hey, anyone want to buy some Armageddon Insurance? When Armageddon comes you will get $10,000,000.00 and the policy only costs $19.95 a month.

    Remember, it is not IF Armageddon comes because Armageddon WILL come. So this is your chance to CASH IN!

  • EvilForce
    EvilForce

    Jeannie I have healed you over the internet of your rabies! Whew...good thing I caught it in time.

    Now, please remit $ 125 to:

    EvilForce
    666 Scamway Dr.
    Satanus, NJ 00111

  • littlerockguy
    littlerockguy

    EF:

    You make house calls?

  • katiekitten
    katiekitten

    Thats GREAT!

    Perhaps he EvilForce can heal me of senility before I get it. Ive got piles coming on in 2007 as well, and ive booked a minor collision with a badger in for next April. I come off OK, but I was wondering if there are any Religious vets out there that can sort the badger out before I mash it?

  • upside/down
    upside/down

    No... he makes "back door" calls...

    Sorry EF...couldn't resist...

    u/d (had a "real" sausage fest for my birthday this weekend class)

  • katiekitten
    katiekitten

    or maybe a born again chef that can do a nice sauce to go with badger pie?

  • zen nudist
    zen nudist
    Hey, anyone want to buy some Armageddon Insurance? When Armageddon comes you will get $10,000,000.00 and the policy only costs $19.95 a month.

    I think with a bit of modification we could have a winner here.... FDS insurance.... if they set a new date and you slave away for it and sell all your stuff and basically pioneer and the date proves to be false [again] then the policy pays off big time.... if the big A happens on or before that date, well you have your reward.... (^_^)

  • jeanniebeanz
    jeanniebeanz

    Rabies? Heavens! I had thought I was a little cranky lately.

    Thank you Dr. Evil Force. I have mailed you a check for $125.00 to your address in Hell. However, I was told at the post office that deliveries into Hell are quite expensive since the mail carriers never come back. Since they would have to charge me for the post man as well as the stamp, I am unable to send you the money.

    You'll just have to come and get it, you cute little devil you.

    J

  • littlerockguy
    littlerockguy

    U/D:

    Im sure he is good at whatever calls he makes :D

    I had a sausage fest yesterday myself while meeting a neighbor in my apt complex.

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