Is your heart bigger since you left?

Ingenuous 20 years ago

I was amazed how, in a matter of days after leaving the Org, my heart seemed bigger. I was free to love people - truly love them as they were and without condition.

I was no longer required to sit in judgement of them because they didn't believe as I did. I didn't have to cut off my affection for non-JWs any longer. I wasn't constantly on the defensive in case someone disagreed with me on a "biblical" teaching - and I always had to be on the defense because you never knew when that was going to happen.

I could finally return the affection non-JWs showed me. I didn't have to pretend I was being nice while secretly holding back in my heart because, as I was told, they might look nice but were actually spiritually rotten on the inside.

I recognized how conditional my JW family members' love for me was. I finally understood why I had such a hard time getting my brain wrapped around the idea of unconditional love. (I actually thought it was a pretty "worldly" way of looking at others for a while.)

I am more gracious around others, more patient, able to value the person even if their behavior or opinion drive me up the wall.

I was finally able to love and accept myself instead of using JW standards to measure my worth.

I could be happy. I actually wake up in the morning and am greatful for another day of life.

Anybody else?

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doofdaddy 20 years ago

Nah, just healthier

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Swan 20 years ago

Yes, actually.

I don't judge people since I no longer know all the answers. Also, because I don't trust in Jah to take care of people any more, I am much more generous.

Tammy

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Cygnus 20 years ago

I'd like to think I have more empathy and compassion for people since I quit the Witnesses. Literally, when not too long later my physical heart's mitral valve blewv out, my heart expanded to app. 35% its normal size. So my answer is yes.

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Emma 20 years ago

Absolutely. It had wanted to stretch for a long time.

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Gopher 20 years ago

Good post.

Being raised a JW, it put "blinders" on me and taught me that all other-worldly people are evil (except those who will become JW's someday). What nonsense.

Without the "blinders", I quickly saw that many people out in the so-called "wicked system" actually are quite helpful and friendly. My "worldly" relatives and even people in general were trying to treat me well, and it didn't take long before I opened my eyes and finally realized it. .

It isn't a utopia out there, and you do have to have some conditions on acceptance of people -- especially if they have earned distrust. Overall though, I'd say that being outside the organization has lifted the general distrust of people that my JW upbringing imposed on me.

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