Do you hide you JW family's practice of shunning from non-JW family?

by kwintestal 29 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  kwintestal

  I thought of this question as I've been talking to different family members about the situation with my parents and grandmother. I wondered if they'd get upset by me telling other non-JW family members what was going on. I recently told a family member in Coventry who I'm sure will end up telling my grandmother's sisters. Do you think they'd get ticked off at it?

  I figured that they should be proud for the stance they took, and should brag about it. What was the point in hiding it? They might feel differently though. Oh well.

  Kwin
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  BrendaCloutier

  I never hid it, but when asked, I would explain that I was estranged from my family because of their religion. If I was asked further, I'd explain further. This went for inlaws, outlaws, friends, co-workers.
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  rebel8

  It's always a tough decision to determine how much negative info about JWs to share with non-JW family. I've done it, but pretty much just the basics. I did feel hesitant to appear as though I'm gossipping or trying to cause strife. My relatives welcomed the info and it went well; in fact, I think they occasionally need the chance to talk about how the JW issues impact them.

  Sorry to hear about what's going on in your family. Too bad such young kids need to feel that hurt.

  A side comment: JWs shouldn't feel the least bit embarassed when they find out you've discussed shunning. My mom likes it--she sees it as an opportunity to witness to them and count yet another RV. There is not even a glimmer that she sees what she's doing as a bad thing.
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  AlmostAtheist

  Funny you should mention... When Gina's family started shunning her sister (when she and her hubby were DF'd for celebrating Christmas) word got back to the non-JW grandmother. The grandmother called Gina's mom and laid into her with all the "how could you shun your own daughter?" stuff. Gina's mom called us wanting to know who "told on them". LOL! She got "in trouble" with grandma, and wanted to know who the tattle-tale was!

  I agree, Kwin. If they are doing what God wants, let them stand up and be proud for it.

  Dave
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  Junction-Guy

  Well I think the average JW would probably hide the shunning from their family, and may even fake a smile or speak with the disfellowshipped family member, just to give the impression that they arent a family destroying religion, because they know it would stumble their "worldly" family members to find out the real truth. I have explained the shunning doctrine to several of my distant relatives, they were really surprised to find out it truly existed.

  Dave
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  littlerockguy

  I would think that most non-JW relatives would already know the practice of shunning. It is not something that is really hidden since the practice of disfellowshipping is mentioned in both the Watchtower and Awake which is distributed to everybody.
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  kittyeatzjdubs

  i don't have to explain. my mom's side (i don't deal w/ my dad's side too much) already knows how my dub family is treating me and they are very disgusted w/ it. especially my mom's 2 sisters. one of them won't even speak to her now.

  luv, jojo
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  Born-Again

  my wife and I have no family except my sis out of the dubs - so we dont even need to hide it..
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  daystar

  Born-again

  You were lucky, then, that you didn't have to deal with your family exploding.
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  Andrea Wideman

  I wouldn't keep the practice of shunning a secret because it would cause too much confusion. My mother-in-law is a JW but her father is not. I am very close to her Dad and try to have a good relationship with her. He is always inviting all of us over to his house. Since I wrote my letter of disassociation I haven't heard from her at all. I did speak with him and share my concerns that she might decide to not speak with me or my family. He said that he would frown upon her doing that. I used to be Catholic, which is his faith, and switched to JW which is hers. He was very supportive of my choice then and he is very supportive of my choice to be a Christian now. He feels that she should do the same. Will have to see what happens. The main thing is that I don't want my family to be divided.
  I did read your other post about when the Grandparents are able to see the kids which is only at your house. I completely agree with that because I don't want her doing that to my kids either. My kids are happy with me and Joel's decision to be Christians not JW's. Honestly they wouldn't appreciate her preaching to them about JW beliefs.