Thanks Lady Lee, I've been in a major funk lately, and this has been weighing heavy on my mind. The desire to know the details has become almost an obsession, and the frustration has just kept mounting. I keep getting worried that if these memories come back with full clarity, I won't be able to handle it and it will ruin my life. This has been such a long standing fear, that some times I worry that is what's getting in the way of progress. I will try my best to take it easy, and let it come when the time is right. Thank you so very much!
maybesbabies
JoinedPosts by maybesbabies
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Memory - How it works
by Lady Lee inmany survivors have difficulty understanding the nature of memory, why we forget and what causes us to remember.
we often doubt what we remember or others doubt what we say.
we think we must be crazy to even have certain thoughtss.
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Memory - How it works
by Lady Lee inmany survivors have difficulty understanding the nature of memory, why we forget and what causes us to remember.
we often doubt what we remember or others doubt what we say.
we think we must be crazy to even have certain thoughtss.
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maybesbabies
Hi Lady Lee and Big Tex, I find this post extremely interesting, as I have memory problems related to my abuse. For a long time, I would be very uncomfortable around trucks with campers, and couldn't figure out why this would cause such anxiety. It wasn't until I started figuring out some of the missing pieces that it came to me that one of the times I was molested was in a truck with a camper. I still have the majority of my memories "blocked", for lack of a better word. When I began talking to my sister Xandria again, a lot of it came rushing back, as she remembered many things that I thought I had forgotten. I began to remember events, such as discussing the molestation with my other sister, R~, at about six years of age, and remember her vehemently denying that it had happened. I still do not remember the events as they happened, but I can recall what happened directly before and directly after the events. I have flipped out several times, without knowing why, just after hearing, smelling or seeing something that triggered intense feelings of fear, or shame. When I was fifteen I was sent to a county-run mental health hospital, and diagnosed as bi-polar, but I don't feel that I am, and have never needed medication to function normally. I don't know the point of this, just rambling I guess. I'm really confused about all this. I know something happened, and I know it was more than one occasion, but the rest is all just a fog. Thanks for your posts, It has given me a lot to think about.
~Tamar
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Its so easy to get acid, you can get it anywhere
by Hamas in.
i guess i cant stay away.
i started getting withdrawl symptoms.
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maybesbabies
Jeez, Hamas, get me all excited by the title.....Anyways, glad you're back!!!! I couldn't stay away either.
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Is the Koran an Inspired Book?
by Happythoughts infrom what i gather--in my opinion--here i go again the book is very negative; it's obsessed with the punishment in the hereafter for the "unbelievers" (an oft cited word in the book) and speaks of them being : chastised in the fire.
" i lost count of the number of times this phrase is used.
the book does not present a loving god--but a vindictive harsh one, more concerned with punishment than life and forgiveness.
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maybesbabies
I've known a few moderate Muslims, and have studied a bit of the Qu'ran also, and many view it the same way Christians view the bible, ie: outdated system of laws, don't apply to the modern world, seeing mostly the good things about God like compassion and forgiveness, and not taking it all literally. Just because there are fundamentalists doesn't mean that there aren't moderates as well. I'll try to find some links on moderate movements in the Middle East to post. I don't know if the Qu'ran is inspired or not, but I have to say that it bears quite a resemblance to the bible (which also advocated striking down non-believers in the OT). My point is, not all Muslims are terrorists, and not all terrorists are Muslims. (as implied by the airplane remark) It's bigotry, IMO, to equate the two, and is as ridiculous to me as anti-semitism. Maybe because I have freedom (from the WTS) of religion now, and never believed what the JW's said about all other religions being bad!! :)
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Bowling for Columbine
by drwtsn32 ini just watched this documentary tonight and enjoyed it.
it's amazing to me the number of gun-related murders in the us... over 11,000 in one year.
i don't remember the exact figure, but canada, japan, and germany combined had less than 500 gun-related murders.
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maybesbabies
Well according to a link mentioned earlier, the US isn't at the top of gun violence by any means:
I just watched the movie a little while ago, and I don't think it said that we were the top out of ALL countries, but we were up there compared to many other nations. He didn't compare the US to Mexico, he compared it to the UK, Canada, and several other nations, such as Taiwan. Also, if you re-read my quote,
what WASN'T distorted was the level of violence in the U.S
The level of violence in the US was not distorted, his numbers were accurate. I'm not talking about his comparisons, I'm talking about the actual level of violence in the US alone. -
81
Bowling for Columbine
by drwtsn32 ini just watched this documentary tonight and enjoyed it.
it's amazing to me the number of gun-related murders in the us... over 11,000 in one year.
i don't remember the exact figure, but canada, japan, and germany combined had less than 500 gun-related murders.
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maybesbabies
I agree with Xan and Babyface, it doesn't matter if some things were distorted, what WASN'T distorted was the level of violence in the U.S. Xan and I can attest to that from personal experience, we lived in some serious ghettos in CA, and went through several drive-bys, etc. Just like kids that are bullied in school can act out and kill, so can kids who grow up defenseless in the ghettos, bullied by gangs, and, dare I say it, bullied by society. I think poverty has a lot to do with it. Your mom can't buy groceries, but you can get a gun anywhere, cheap or even free. There is a definite rage in the youth who grow up like we did, and where we did. The rage of being powerless. I don't have the answers to solving the violence, but I feel that part of it can come from uniting communities and closing the gap between the haves and the have nots.
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Is there anything you'd willingly give your life for?
by Happythoughts ini would willingly give my life to save my child.
i'm sure that would be the same answer for most parents, but how about those people without kids?
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maybesbabies
Boy, that's a toughy!!! When my mom got df'd, and my dad would tell all of us that she was not going to make it into paradise, I used to pray and ask big J if he would take me instead, so that my siblings would have our mom in the after life. Does that count?
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My new name
by TipToe ini'd like my new name to be tiptoe if that's ok. it's my little cat's name and i'll be tiptoeing around all of you after what i said...
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maybesbabies
Hiya Tip toe!!!! Glad you are here, it's always nice to have people who speak their mind, especially about subjects as important as the WTS and the abuses they cover up!!! I don't know if you know this, but I think you got the attention and admiration of a great many people on this board by what you posted!!!! I know I certainly respected the hell out of you from the first post!!! Have fun here!!!!
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maybesbabies
Ahhhh Hahahahhaha!!! I wish my guy was metro, I have to smell his pits everytime I roll over and try to cuddle him!!!! I tried buying him cologne, but he won't wear it, I have to buy him new undies every month, I try to get him to put the seat down, and as far as getting him to wear a suit......fuggedaboudit!!!!! He's just so.....so....hetero!!! I really don't mind his looks or body odor, it's just when he won't talk that bugs me!!!!!