Posts by OneEyedJoe

26

Want to share your thoughts on JWs?

by punkofnice in

jw
friends

well, it's been a long while since i last visited here.

i've been doing this and that...you know....lugubrious life and all.. i am interested in collating views from all types of people about jws, albeit non jws, ex jws....anyone associated with jws who wants to share their viewpoint.

later on i'd like to self publish these collected interviews but cannot offer any money as the project is more about giving people an opportunity to speak, help, whatever, rather than make a best seller.

OneEyedJoe

I'll play. Not sure what you mean by gathering unbiased opinions. On a topic like that, I'm pretty sure that's roughly impossible. I suppose you could get an unbiased opinion from someone that's never encountered JWs, but that'd be worthless.

JW Interview.

Name/Pseudonym: OneEyedJoe

Gender: M

Country: USA

Were/are you a JW? I was a JW, but no longer consider myself to be one.

How were/are you associated with JWs

Born in

How long were you a JW? (If applicable) 28 years.

What drew you to the JWs? My parents required it.

What do/did you enjoy about being a JW? The only thing I can say I truly enjoyed was when I was young (~8-15) I enjoyed feeling as if I knew more about the bible than the adults I would talk to in the ministry.

What is your best/fondest memory? I don't have any fond memories of being a JW, but I do have a few good memories with JW friends.

What is your funniest memory? When a half-wit was invited to give the closing prayer for the mid-week meeting and at one point said "we're sorry for all the shit...er..stuff that we do wrong..." Apparently one of the two elderly sisters sitting directly behind me didn't hear what had been said and asked the other for clarification. It was pretty funny hearing an 80+ year old woman say in the most timid voice possible "he said shit"

If alive in 1975 as a JW, do you remember it? What are you memories as a JW? Wasn't alive then.

Can you think of anything positive or good to say about the watchtower organisation? There's nothing positive about the organization itself. Individual JWs can be quite good people in spite of this, though.

Do you believe the JWs have the ‘truth’? Absolutely not

Would you recommend being a JW and why do you answer thus? I would recommend strongly against becoming a JW. This is not a religion as such, it is a cult that offers no benefit that cannot be found elsewhere in a much healthier way. It is a system designed to put people in a mental prison and enslave them to a corporation run by what must either be half-wits or completely morally bankrupt men.

Please tell us what you want us to know about being a JW. It's a harmful cult that has cost more lives than heaven's gate, jonestown, and the branch davidians combined.

15

Being lied to by parents

by What is Truth? in

jw
friends

i mean pretty much all parents lie to their children at some point about something and usually it was to protect them or just wasn't something important and it normally doesn't affect the relationship between them and their child.

but how does a person reconcile and recover their appreciation for their parents after finding out almost everything they taught them was an evil lie?

i don't mean going back to the same relationship as i know that is gone, especially if the parents are still deceived.

OneEyedJoe

As others have said, in most cases when parents raise their kids in a cult, they're just doing the best they know how to do. It just happened that they were victims themselves.

The only thing I hold against my father for my cult indoctrination was the way he manipulated me into getting baptized. What he did couldn't be excused even by JW rules since I wasn't driven to do it by love for Jehovah but by his manipulation. I can't imagine that such a baptism would be considered as being enough for forgiveness of sins and entry into paradise.

16

2015 Regional Conventions Baptisms

by Gayle in

jw
friends

since this is the first weekend of rcs, anyone going that can give estimates of how many are getting baptized, how many appeared about that were jw youth, and what attendance figure is at these rcs?.

i know u.s. baptisms are declining.

can any keep a running report?

OneEyedJoe

I would bet that a large portion of the US baptisms last year were because of the international conventions. Anyone holding off might've seen it as an opportunity that they would later regret missing out on, and parents no doubt used it to manipulate their kids into joining up. They'd get to walk on the field where their favorite football players played, they'd get to brag about being dunked at an IC, etc. It seemed significant.

This year I expect we'll be right back on the trend line, if not a slight correction below it.

27

Assembly today, Survival Tips and Recommendations Please!

by Blackfalcon98 in

jw
friends

so there's an indoctrination session tomorrow......any tips for getting through with my sanity intact?

OneEyedJoe

Whiskey in a flask?

I always spent as much time as possible out of the seats and surfing the net or reading ebooks.

4

Get behind me...ERM Satan!

by username in

ok random thought just popped in my mind!.

if satan was cast down from heaven in 1914 how did he tempt jesus almost 2000 years previously?

surely jeeeeehovah wouldn't have let the evil one reside in heaven for so long?

OneEyedJoe

Not sure what you're asking - are you saying why did god let satan hang out in heaven for so long after being a dick to Jesus, or are you asking how he was able to be a dick to jesus if he was in heaven?

On the first one - I suppose the answer is the same as why it's taken 6000 years to demonstrate that god's rulership is the only way. Pretty sure that should only take like 2-3 (non-overlapping) generations to be sufficiently proven. I guess JWs would fall back on the 1000 years is as a day to god nonsense.

For the second - the JW doctrine is that until 1914 satan had free reign to travel between heaven and earth, but after he's confined to the earth. So before he'd go up to god and taunt him and stuff and then he'd come down to earth and dick around with people and cause tsunamis and such, then back to heaven, etc.

20

help catagorize my wife: I truely believe she suffers from cognitive dissonance and other things this stupid cult causes.

by goingthruthemotions in

i find it hard sometimes to get a good idea has to how to communicate with my wife when it come to this stupid cult.. she is born in and stopped attending for many years and got baptized later in life.

i truely believe she suffers from cognitive dissonance and other things this stupid cult causes.. here is a breakdown of what i gather to be where she is mentally.. * she calls the borg her faith.

here are actions that she does that go against her thoughts:.

OneEyedJoe

It sounds like your wife has some similarity to mine, and I think the root of it may be that the cult has systematically destroyed their self-confidence. They have no faith in themselves to make the right decision, so they put it on their parents or the elders to decide for them - and they'll always pick the cult 100% of the time.

When I showed my wife the misquotes/lies in the creation book, her response was basically "I just must not be understanding this right." It's impossible in her mind that they could be lying, so anything that she sees that could be interpreted as a lie is her misunderstanding it.

What I'm trying to do (and hopefully you'll have more luck than I have so far) is push her towards non-cult things that she can find fulfillment in. When people are able to do something rewarding and express themselves and see it turn out well, they naturally gain confidence that will spill over into other areas of life. There's also the side-benefit of having interests outside the cult that can replace cult activities.

16

No mention of DF in new brochure?

by thedepressedsoul in

i went on my tablet today and clicked "yes" that i attended the convention (they probably tracked my ip and two elders will show up on my door step).

i scanned through the new brochure on bringing those who have left back.

i noticed that not once they mentioned anyone who was df!

OneEyedJoe

Remember there is another group of people we don't see on this website, mentally in but physically out. I think this is for them. as already mentioned once someone is mentally out, this drivel won't sway them.

What I wonder, though, is whether or not this will actually have any impact on them. From what I've seen these folks essentially never come back for good. Sometimes they'll come back for a short time but usually they're out again after a month and you don't see them for a few years. This is in spite of all efforts by family and friends to "encourage" them. Even if some stupid brochure gets them to come back to a meeting a few times, they're not going to stay long. They're still mentally trapped, but they know enough to realize that they're happier when they're not going. The only cases where I've seen someone who was once inactive come back and really embrace it has been after a death in the family, but even then it's about 50/50 (at best) whether they stayed for the long-term.

16

No mention of DF in new brochure?

by thedepressedsoul in

i went on my tablet today and clicked "yes" that i attended the convention (they probably tracked my ip and two elders will show up on my door step).

i scanned through the new brochure on bringing those who have left back.

i noticed that not once they mentioned anyone who was df!

OneEyedJoe

I don't know, I think not mentioning disfellowshipped ones will just reinforce in the r&f's mind that being irregular is leaving Jehovah. It might serve to tighten the noose to those so susceptible.

I'm thinking along these lines. I haven't read it yet, but my feeling is that this brochure is primarily to harden active JWs, not to actually get anyone back. They know that in most cases if someone becomes inactive, trying to get them back will be fruitless (or at best, temporary) unless there's some major life event and in that case they're probably fairly likely to come back on their own (this is all assuming that they're still indoctrinated).

Sure, this might pull a few more poor souls back into the cult (but only if they never truly escaped) but the primary purpose is the effect it will have on those who are active. For any with inactive family it will make them think "the GB is so loving that they know how difficult this is and they're trying to help." It will also reinforce that any inactive ones have "left Jehovah" not a man-made organization, thus helping to harden the R/F's view that they're on the moral high-ground and are unassailable - essentially an indirect ad hominem argument against anything that an inactive person might say about why they left. For JWs that know some inactive ones but aren't close to them, this will only serve to increase their feelings of superiority and make them want to go on and on about Jehovah and the cult anytime they happen to bump into them - which will likely be effective in alienating any who are mentally out so that they think "why bother" instead of trying to help wake up an active JW.

Like I said, I haven't read the brochure so correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm guessing there's also a few "examples" of why someone might've left - yes? These are there to further reinforce the idea that there is no valid reason to leave - the examples will probably be things like materialism, fornication, the anxieties of life, depression, a perceived (never real!) injustice that they've suffered, etc. This will cause the readers to look back over past interactions with the inactive person they're considering and re-interpret them through this lens. Did you buy a new car a little while after you left? You're materialistic and probably a workaholic - you're just too selfish to give time to Jehovah. Did you claim depression during your fade? You've become bogged down by the anxieties of life and not putting enough trust in Jehovah. Did you get reproved/DF'd before leaving with no attempt to come back? You feel like Jehovah's attempts to help you were unjust and you are therefore "puffed up with pride" and won't come back. etc. etc. The human brain is amazing at fitting things to patterns (even when they're not there) and when they list reasons why someone might leave the brain's inclination is to automatically make their observations fit the pattern. Sort of a retro-active confirmation bias.

To me this seems more like damage control than any real effort to draw anyone back. Threre's a complex set of emotions that an active JW goes through when someone close to them leaves. There's saddness, guilt, confusion, etc. and in that the mind will often wander - this gets out in front of anyone's mind wandering to things like "what if they have a valid reason?" or "what if they left because they know something about xxx" where xxx is a doubt that they have themselves. Putting the R/F on the moral high-ground (in their minds) will harden their resolve to stay.

4

Jehovah's Witnesses Give Presents Their Own Way

by Bangalore in

jw
friends

jehovah's witnesses give presents their own way.. http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/lara-ruffle-coles/jehovahs-witnesses-give-presents-their-own-way_b_7231380.html.

.

bangalore.

OneEyedJoe

Its amazing how the indoctrination lingers. Still reciting the stock lines "It's more exciting because I don't know when I'm going to get a present!" As if it's about the damn presents. It's not. It's about separation from other people - as a JW there are constant signals that "worldly" people aren't like you. Talking about christmas/birthdays/holidays is just one of a thousand small, constant cues that you're around someone who's not like you. Cues that you shouldn't get too close to this person or share too much with them. This is what it's all about. Many cults put up literal walls to separate their members from the rest of society, the JWs put up virtual walls that can be just as effective. Literal walls are obvious and it's easy to wonder "are they keeping me in or keeping dangers out" but the virtual walls that get put up to keep a JW from getting too close to normal people are much more subtle and much less likely to be blamed on the leadership of the cult.

It's so sad to me to see someone who's ostensibly left the cult but has never actually examined the sweeping effects it's had on their life, or really proven to themselves that it's not just a false religion but a harmful mind control cult. I suppose it makes sense when someone leaves at such a young age that they might not make this connection since they're still at a point where there's an expectation of some control over your life by others.

64

What triggered your doubts / awakening?

by Tornintwo in

i am sort of new here, used a different username for a while but things got 'difficult' at home so i've since been lurking.... what i would be really interested to know, if you don't mind sharing, is what it was that triggered your doubts and initial research which led to awakening, was it a bad experience, injustice, changed doctrine?

for me, it was seeing mistreatment of young ones in the congregation, they're under so much pressure and as soon as they go even slightly astray they are shunned, either informally (as bad associations which pushes them further into the 'world') or formally - with elders dying to throw the book at them so they even lose their family.... ...then reading about child abuse issues in the press.... ...which led me to silentlambs.

...then jw facts, this forum and coc, wham!

OneEyedJoe

I'm with us, truthseeker. Always dreaded someone seeing my blood card when I had my wallet out, always tried to hide that I wasn't singing happy birthday. I hated having to explain things about being a jw that didn't really make sense to me (even though I could parrot the official logic perfectly) it really sucked.

Also - as FMF said - asking myself if I'd be a jw were I not born in and the answer was always no.