Posts by OneEyedJoe

19

So I overheard a discussion that my son and wife were having about creation yesterday

so i am getting ready for bed yesterday night and i overhear my teenage son and wife talking about how the evidence of creation far outweighs the evidence of evolution.

i heard my son say that evolution has so many holes and how could something happen from nothing.

i wanted to open the door and ask them both how the creator happened from nothing just to see what they would say..

OneEyedJoe

I plan on talking to my son when my wife is not around and tell him not to allow himself to be spoon fed everything that he hears and is taught. It is difficult because he is my stepson and my wife has legal authority in virtually all of the decisions that involve him. I am going to try to encourage him to do his own research and to arrive at his own conclusions.

This is a great plan, in my opinion. Telling him "evolution did it" vs his mother saying "god did it" isn't going to seem like either of you are any different, so he'll just stick to what he's decided. Telling him "don't trust anyone" vs her implicitly telling him "take my word for it" will be quite a contrast and might be enough to make him question why you have the confidence that he should figure it out on his own, while she (and the cult) insist you simply trust them.

On the topic of the earth's apparent perfection for suitability for life, the creationist argument can be defeated without even appealing to natural disasters. If life requires a fairly narrow set of conditions to exist (this can be argued for the life we see here, but might not be the case for all forms of life) then it would make sense that any life that formed would do so in a place that is apparently perfect for it. Furthermore, specialization over 4 billion years would be expected to result in life that appears to be perfectly suited to its environment. It's not that the earth is perfect for life, it's that life has become more or less perfect for the earth.

29

Mentally Diseased - is it partly our fault that we got this label?

by cappytan in

jw
friends

i was thinking about this the other day.. a common way for apostates to "fade" is to pretend to have depression or anxiety problems.. is it possible, that when apostates become known, the elders report to the society that said person was undergoing mental health problems?

i can see a scenario where the society then took those statistics that were reported and just decided, "well, it looks like the only ones leaving are those with mental diseases.".

oh, and not to mention the subliminal messages conspiracy theorists.

OneEyedJoe

Another thought on this - confirmation bias being what it is, the GB could probably tell the JWs that apostates turn green after they defect and JWs would find a way to see examples confirming this. If someone left and wore green eye shadow once, would she then be partially responsible for the statement? The mentally diseased nonsense is just a means of demonizing us and reinforcing the phobia. I wouldn't read too much more into it beyond that.

15

Vacation Time: You want me to use my personal vacation to attend the D.C.? Something i feel is a load of B.S.and waste of my precious time

by goingthruthemotions in

so you all know that my wife is still blinded....i am well awake and so are our son's.

so she is expecting me to use my vacation time from work to attend the d.c. waste 3 days of dribble from the cult.

what of waste of time....yet i will do it to keep the peace.

OneEyedJoe

Ugh that's miserable. Bring a flask.

29

Mentally Diseased - is it partly our fault that we got this label?

by cappytan in

jw
friends

i was thinking about this the other day.. a common way for apostates to "fade" is to pretend to have depression or anxiety problems.. is it possible, that when apostates become known, the elders report to the society that said person was undergoing mental health problems?

i can see a scenario where the society then took those statistics that were reported and just decided, "well, it looks like the only ones leaving are those with mental diseases.".

oh, and not to mention the subliminal messages conspiracy theorists.

OneEyedJoe

Even if we apostates have done something to earn the title, it's still the cult's fault in most cases since they're the ones that screwed us up to the point that we might be a little off. That said, it should be obvious that people leaving are no more mentally diseased than the average JW. I've never seen another group of people with such a high incidence of depression, hypochondria, chronic fatigue syndrome, etc, etc. as JWs have.

16

Another "damned if they do/don't" Thread & the Perpetual Motion Machine

by DarioKehl in

a few days ago, a jw apologist posted a thread with a similar title.

although he was defending their behavior, i've observed this cycle as well.

i have a different spin on it, though.. how often do you see posts from people who are upset that "no one even bothers to check in on me," only to read as many threads about "they keep calling & texting--why won't they leave me alone?

OneEyedJoe

I think what the OP misses is that there's more than 2 choices. When someone stops going to the cult meetings, the options aren't limited to either hounding/manipulation tactics or complete shunning. There's the "normal" option of just interacting with a person like they're a damn human being and not trying to manipulate them in any way. The reason they're "damned if they do, damned if they don't" is because (in most cases) whatever they do all falls into the same category - manipulation. The hounding by elders, the "we miss you" comments from people you never talked to, the love bombing if you happen to show up for an odd meeting, etc is all just as bad as the complete shunning and dropping you when you leave because it's manipulative behavior that shows that your only value to them is in your tacit endorsement of the cult by your presence.

So in my opinion the simultaneous complains about being ignored and being hounded is not hypocrisy at all. It's all a valid complaint about the manipulative behavior of JWs that you probably once thought were real friends. It's painful coming to the realization that (for a born-in) everyone that you've ever had a relationship with only valued you because you were a fellow cultist. It makes your entire life feel like it's all been fake and a lie and manipulation and I think it's completely justifiable to complain about the continued manipulation, whatever form it takes.

10

I Went Into "Cult Mode" The Other Day..

by humblepotato in

jw
friends

if you recall, i'm just coming to grips with ttatt and atheism after a few years of doubts.

made a long post around here, a while ago, talking about the very subject.

but, anyways.... so the other day, my wife was telling me how she was just exhausted and "peopled out.

OneEyedJoe

Can't say that I've ever done anything quite like that - though I do know a large part of my thinking is still influenced by the cult indoctrination.

I have the same issues dealing with my wife's guilt. The best thing to do is probably distraction with something she really enjoys. If you miss a meeting and you're just moping around the house instead, it actually serves to strengthen some of the indoctrination - she'll associate being miserable with missing meetings. You need to distract with something especially good and break that association.

The meetings and recruiting can definitely make a JW feel happier, but it's only serving to ease a problem that the cult itself created. You definitely shouldn't feel guilty like you're making your wife miserable by helping her to miss cult meetings - it might make her miserable short term, but the cult is what's responsible for that, not you.

19

Ideas how to answer a jw friend

by Daniel1555 in

jw
friends

i faded completely (no kh visits or field service).. just recently a close friend from the kh wrote:.

"dear daniel.

it's a pity that we don't see you anymore at the kingdom hall.

OneEyedJoe

Depends on the type of relationship you have, but I would probably say something about how happy you've been lately and if you actually value them as a friend, invite them to meet up in a non-cult setting.

47

"Make a list of people you want to meet in the New System!" (New September Watchtower)

by FusionTheism in

watchtower september 2015 study edition, "stand firm in the faith," paragraphs 16 and 17:.

following jesus example, we must read the bible daily, study it, and meditate on what we learn.

along with general bible study, dig into topics about which you may have questions.. you can imitate jesus by meditating on the wonderful promises jehovah has made to you.

OneEyedJoe

One more trick cults use to bypass critical thinking skills - telling you to imagine something. Imagination operates completely independent from logical thought and critical thinking (which is part of what makes it so useful to is) but it still can create the same emotion as a real event.

9

Do you impose your views on others?

by wifibandit in

the irony!

when i first saw this picture i thought they were holding the bible teach book!

ha!

OneEyedJoe

JW's don't impose their view on others. They impose the GB's view on others!

8

Hierarchy of Needs Revelation

by freemindfade in

in my quest to always understand why jws get so f%$@ed up (yes oubliette, lets review lol) i discovered something today.

in speaking with one of my fellow heathen friends from this site i was talking about maslov's hierarchy of needs in an unrelated subject but i had an epiphany.

witnesses are held at the third level and never make it to the oh so critical top two sections.

OneEyedJoe

Yep...I suspect this is a large part of how cults control people - keep them from getting comfortable enough that they feel like they can reach out to satisfy their needs on a higher level. For me, it wasn't until my life had settled down significantly and my other needs were met that my discomfort with the cult was a big enough problem that I felt like I needed to do something about it (and at the same time, I felt safe enough to do something about it).