Posts by OneEyedJoe

69

Thinking of Going Full Disclosure With Wife. Sorta

by freemindfade in

jw
friends

soliciting any and all opinions.

as some of you may know, wife is full in pioneer.

my fade has gone from us fighting.

OneEyedJoe

Like the others have said - it's totally up to you where you go, but I'll offer you a data point:

I regret not coming clean to my wife much more early on after my discovery of TTATT. I think it's probably important to take a few days or maybe weeks to really let it sink in, but it seems I entirely lack the skillset required to wake someone up if their connection to the cult is social and emotional. I had been in because of all the "proof" (which towards the end I realized the only thing holding me in was that they got lucky with 1914) and the proof that it was a cult was plenty to do the trick for me. So because of my inability in that respect, the year I spent trying to plant seeds was entirely fruitless and only damaged our marriage. When I "came out" to her at the end, it didn't go any better than it would've from day 1, and in a lot of ways it went worse precisely because I'd waited so long. I think if I had been open from the beginning I could've made it a somewhat more collaborative process of discovering whether it's the truth and even if I hadn't won her over that way, I think our marriage would currently be in a somewhat better place. Furthermore, since that happened I haven't had to sit through a single meeting, which is definitely a nice payoff. It's amazing how much more like yourself you begin to feel after being away from the mental stress of sitting at cult meetings.

It sounds like you've already eased into it and your wife is learning to come to terms with it in her own way. Not sure what your relationship is like, but in my case my wife was holding a lot of fear and distress inside and the uncertainty about my fate was eating away at her. At least now that she knows I'm destined for death at armageddon she can try to deal with it instead of being in limbo. It's possible that your wife might be doing the same, and releasing her from that, while initially painful, would be a kindness if that's the case. Since there doesn't seem to be any great risk of your wife leaving you, making the first move and being open and honest may actually serve you well.

Again, all this is said without any warranty, and is coming from someone that probably handled everything with his wife about as poorly as possible, so do with it what you will. I wish you the best of luck in whatever you choose to do.

30

What started me on the path to waking up about the lies the WT teaches?

by oppostate in

it was a simple question: isn't jesus my "mediator" if i put faith in him like the scriptures say?

the research to that answer, from the w79 4/1 p. 31, was mind blowing.

how dare they deny me a belief firmly stated in the scriptures?

OneEyedJoe

The overlapping generation got me started and the misquotes in the creation book solidified my doubts.

17

Vacation Time! Going To A Regional?

by millie210 in

this is the first year i have not been at a summer assembly.. the friends here locally just got back from the regional in our area.. they mostly took their vacation time from work to attend.. while they were gone i had an epiphany...... why is it that the rank and file take their summer vacation time to attend an assembly (we have all heard this hammered in from the platform) whereas the governing body attend as part of their "work".. it cant be as simple as "well, they are giving talks" because there are many brothers that give talks from the rank and file also who have used up precious vacation hours and drug their entire family there plus give their parts.. or what about other brothers and sisters who volunteer and clean at the assembly.

on vacation.. so the pubs.

travel at their own expense, pay for their own rooms and food, and give parts and it is supposed to be viewed as their vacation.. the gb and c.o.s travel to the same assembly and stay in provided for accomadations, give a talk or two and they are "working".. what is that about?.

OneEyedJoe

To be fair, the life of a GB member is pretty much a non-stop vacation of living on manicured grounds (that they neither mow nor pay for) with all their needs met and plenty of trips to scenic locations world-wide. In comparison, trudging through 3 days of a convention is definitely hard work.

6

Why Child Baptisms Are Invalid Using WT Logic

by JW_Rogue in

when i was baptized as a child i remember quite well that there were six steps that one must take before getting baptized.

i recently looked up some articles on this subject on jw.org and the latest article says there are 9 steps.

they now include field service and going to the meetings as steps.

OneEyedJoe

No, you've got it all wrong getting Married is no big deal but getting a driver's license is a very important decision.

If they'd let kids wait until they were 16, it would be a vast improvement. Most of the baptisms that I've seen lately have been well under that age, some as young as 7. It seems that 16 is being put forth as the MAXIMUM age that a child should reach before getting baptized.

6

Why Child Baptisms Are Invalid Using WT Logic

by JW_Rogue in

when i was baptized as a child i remember quite well that there were six steps that one must take before getting baptized.

i recently looked up some articles on this subject on jw.org and the latest article says there are 9 steps.

they now include field service and going to the meetings as steps.

OneEyedJoe

Using their logic on birthdays (they're evil because people died in both biblical accounts of birthdays) no one should be baptized at any age below 30 because that's the only known age of someone that was baptized.

13

Why is shunning unloveing

by poopie in

jw
friends

please give reasons for all the lurkers.

and why does shunning show the same attitude as the pharisees?

OneEyedJoe

Taken from the watchtower's own words: http://www.jw.org/en/publications/magazines/g201306/the-silent-treatment/

"when it is used as a means to retaliate or manipulate, the silent treatment not only prolongs conflict but also erodes [...] respect"

The silent treatment between spouses is directly condemned by the article as unloving, unproductive, retaliatory and manipulative. Just because you might not be married to someone doesn't make this behavior any better or somehow loving all of a sudden. In fact, I would argue that participating in the systematic and indefinite "silent treatment" of shunning is far worse than giving a spouse the silent treatment for a few days.

9

REQUEST: Video Links for this year's RC Dramas

by Oubliette in

does anyone have the links for this year's rc videos?

i'm especially interested in the video drama about the jw woman that married an upbaptized man.

i have a couple of friends in similar situations--wife in, they're not--and the wives still attend.

OneEyedJoe

Cappytan - I'm having trouble viewing that on the jw.org link you provided. They've got amazing security - it asked me if I'd already attended the convention and when I said no it wouldn't let me in! Whatever will I do?

4

Caleb's Logic - Do the math

by Esse quam videri in

the scene is the kitchen table where we find calebs dad and mom in conversation.

dad - a letter?

mom so we are going to write a letter to everyone we know and ask them to give us some of their money, so that we have as much money coming in as is going out.

OneEyedJoe

Ha, that is a great point - they never actually said that they didn't have enough money to foot the bill, just that they weren't maintaining equilibrium. Considering that they have some huge temporary costs, that's nothing to act surprised about. They just wanted to manipulate the situation to make it seem like they're facing insolvency to get a little more cash out of it.

35

Are JWs trying to make dysfunctional kids and destroy their ability to live normal lives?

by C0ntr013r in

are jws trying to make dysfunctional kids that wont "fit" in normal society so they will "return to jehovah"?

because there have been many stories about young people who have been out in the world only to find how bad it was and how correct the org was.. a good jw kid with "good" jw parents will have many big issues, some examples:.

fear of demons (fear, misfit).

OneEyedJoe

Yes, the system is absolutely designed to isolate JWs from the world at large. Who needs a real cult-compound with real walls when you can train the cultists to put up walls between themselves and normal people on their own? I would also add to the list the use of loaded language - this constantly reminds a JW that they're different from the people they talk to - any time they hear the words "mass" "church" "pastor" "deacon" "father" etc it serves as a reminder that these people are worldly and they're not like me. It also makes them uncomfortable in normal conversations when they talk about where they were tuesday night - they either have to use the repulsive word "church" or they have to explain what a meeting or a kingdom hall is. Every aspect of the cult is designed to create drones that are so isolated from normal people that they can never fathom becoming a normal person.

11

Education Level of GB

by The_Doctor10 in

after seeing so many topics about the stupidity of the gb, just got me wondering, anyone know the secular education levels of the gb?

are they high school level religious zealots or are they college educated manipulators?

OneEyedJoe

I think it's pretty clear that they're making it up as they go. The events of the last few years haven't exactly looked like the fruits of long-term planning or deep thought. It's all reactionary, and most of it is more or less unrestrained reaction.

As for "twisting of historical events to fit Biblical prophecy" I don't think there's been any of that since freddie the oracle died. Lately it's all been about obeying with no evidence, faith, guilt, and emotional manipulation. The pseudo-intellectual stuff is all gone.

Not that any of that helps you determine their educational level. I'd be surprised if any had been to college, though.