there are some conflicting views on this subject; when i was a teenage jw i was friends with someone of the opposite sex and we were the best of mates...nothing sexual, no attraction in that department at all but it was frowned upon by those in the congregation (as you can probably imagine).. my ex wife never believed a man and woman could be just platonic...hence no longer with her...but..now being somewhat older (and a teeny bit wiser .
what do you think though, do you think a man and woman can be just friends and more importantly has this view been changed since leaving the jw's?.
db
Most of my buddies are guys, and about half of my boyfriend's buddies are women. We're both comfortable with this; I trust myself as I trust him, and vice-versa. Within reason, though- no sleepovers allowed!
If I found a man especially attractive, though, I don't think it would feel right to pursue a close friendship with him- it would feel wierd, and it would make my boo uncomfortable, I suppose.
we all enjoy an interesting discussion.
but, sooner or later it seem inevitable that somebody comes along and throws a monekywrench into the mechanism and the huge engine sputters to a halt.. what do people do in a discussion that ticks you off and stops the flow of conversation and turns it from being productive to unproductive?.
is it as simple as disagreeing with you?.
I love to discuss, debate, even argue a bit. What I don't enjoy, is when there is a basic lack of respect between participants in a conversation. Things like chronic interrupting, name-calling, eye-rolling or other mocking gestures just make me want to end the conversation and walk away.
were you a prude as a jw?
are you still one?
prudes, (especially jws) are so judgmental.
As a jw, I was actually considered a bit on the wild side. I pierced my nose, got a tattoo, worked in a cocktail lounge. I figured that, in the great scheme of things, I wasn't such a bad person- I went out in service plenty, I attended and participated in all the meetings, I faithfully dropped money in the box for the worldwide work...why should Jehovah care about a little youthful silliness on my part? Heck, Jesus hung out with people from all walks of life, and his first miracle was turning water to wine- he sure as hell wasn't a prude!
Now, as a worldly chick, I'm thought of as the prude amongst my friends. Every time I go to a party, I get elected to be the designated driver, because they all just assume that I'm not interested in drinking. People tend to watch their language around me (which is funny, as I cuss like a pirate myself!) I'm not sure how to shake this image, nor even if it's a good image to shake.
ok, here it goes, everybody can put up one song for the official jwd soundtrack, mine:.
"fu-gee-la" by the fugees.
[(lauryn) repeat chorus 2x:].
"Minority" by Green Day.
when i was df i decided to use the time wisely and read the insight books which is how i came across this
the armies of pagan nations often raped the women of conquered cities, but not so the victorious soldiers of israel.
nor were they permitted for a month to marry a captive woman.
Raping, pillaging, forcibly "marrying" a woman who's family you slaughtered- that is, unless you decided to kick her out once you were done with her; Israelite soldiers had some pretty f***ed up perks to their jobs.
With stuff like this in the Bible, is it any wonder so many of us have rejected Christianity?
who still find it strange years on to dive straight into your mail meal without 'giving thanks'?
i say main meal, because dad's prayers were always considerably lengthy before a main meal, and are an institution in every jw household.
even now after a few years i'm just about ready to tuck in when i find myself saying a simple thanks under my breath.
With all due respect to my atheist friends here...
Our creator has given us, not only the rich variety of food most of us have access to, but also the capacity to enjoy it- it's aromas, flavors, textures, and the simple pleasure of sharing it with friends or family. It's not just a matter of feeding an addiction. So, what's the big deal about taking a couple of minutes to gratefully acknowledge what She's given us?
In all honesty, I don't pray over every single meal I eat; most of the time, I'm in such a mad rush that any prayer would be hurried and essentially meaningless. But when I've got the time to do it properly, I think it's only right to say a heartfelt "thank you" to the One who provided the food and the ability to enjoy it.
.
men have facial hair and women don't, and that's god who decided that.. so why can't brothers have beards or goatees.
.
Actually, although I know in my heart it was totally unfair and arbitrary, the no-beard rule was one I kind of liked. Generally, men are so much handsomer without facial hair. Only problem was, they didn't ban mustaches, so all the guys in my cong grew big bushy ones, to compensate for being denied beard privileges. They all ended up looking like 70's porn stars in bad polyester suits.
i am starting to remember something weird when i left the jw's, but wonder if it's a physchological manifestation of the brainwashing & control they had over me and the guilt trip/fear of being 'bad'.
i remember when i used to look up toward the sky sometimes and pray a silent prayer to jehovah.
after i got disfellowshipped, i felt like when i looked up and thought about god that there was almost a physical ceiling on the other side of the blue sky that curtained me off from jehovah hearing my prayers.
love2b- I know exactly what you're talking about. I never had a real relationship with my creator until I left the witnesses- then, after a few months of anger and avoidance, I started praying again. I find that my prayers now have so much more meaning, and I feel that they're actually being listened to as well!
Sometimes, when I'm alone in my home and deep in my evening prayers, there is a definite feeling that I'm not alone- that the One to whom I'm speaking is present and listening to every word I say. I think that's how prayer is supposed to make us feel.
it's friday evening!
how will you be spending your weekend?
what will you be doing to relax tonight folks?.
Well, I got my damn taxes done, HOORAY, and have worked my tuckus off this past week. I so desperately need a break. So tonight, I will go over to my honey-bunny's house, take a loooonnng, hot shower, and proceed to commit several disfellowshipping offenses upon his person. Then it's back to work first thing tomorrow morning.
what's been your experiences and would you go to one if they were in your area?
if you don't have any official gatherings for ex-jw's then what have you and your ex-jw friends done for fun?
hopefully curiousity doesn't kill this cat.
Love11- I went to my first fest two months ago. There was only one person there who I'd actually met in person before (but we hadn't seen each other for like, 12 years). I was surprised at how mellow the vibe was. Every person I met seemed pretty normal, actually. I had a laugh over how very different many folks are in "real life", as opposed to how I'd been picturing them. For the record, most of the guys on this site are a helluva lot hotter than their avatars would lead you to believe. I say this as someone who's utterly monogamous, but not dead yet.
I think that some opportunities existed for some "bad" behavior, ie drugs, drinking, hooking up, but it wasn't overt, and I had a lovely time at the party, nursing my one drink. I imagine that, like all parties, each apostafest has its own feel, dependant on who's attending. But my one experience was prolly 97% positive, for what it's worth.
