Hi Sevan,
Am feeling for you.
It was a terrible time for me when I did the unthinkable, looked the 'organisation' in the eye and thought 'this is wrong'.
I have always sensed there was something unseen going on, before I became a JW.
It is a rough road exiting the mind control of the organisation.
I believe.....like I breathe.
I'm not going to explain why or how - I just do.
This 'sense' just won't leave me or go away....you are certainly not alone.
The ancient writings that promise that God wills that All will be reconciled back to him.....