Msil,
My heart is pounding after reading your story. How terrified you must have been.
People, that have not been through or have seen such an event, DO find it unbelievable. I don't, however. At 10 years old, hidden, standing only a few yard away, I witnessed my father being beaten with a lead pipe.
I haven't thought about the happenings of that day in many years.
When I line up all of the tramatic events of my childhood and adolesence, I am amazed I'm not locked away in a padded cell never to be heard from again.
I wonder what difference, emotionally, there is between those that inspite of the horrible circumstances they have lived through are still able to piece together a meaningful life. And those other struggling individuals that just never seem to be able to overcome them and flounder in the abyss of painful memories.
Perhaps, the difference is being able to find joy in seemingly mundane, "joyless" events. Like traffic.
Andee