It's all BS...my aunt (my mother's sister), pretty much said she wanted nothing to do with JW religeon any longer, will not attend meetings, associates with my cousin (also DF'd) because she doesn't believe in shunning.....told the elders exactly how she feels, never df'd, however, my mother having knowledge of this, still invites her to come to AZ to stay w/her in her home, a place I'm never welcomed to stay.....because "technically" she's not "DF'd"......it's all hypocritical bs.....
Don't try to make sense of it, there is no logic to it.