To be fair, you said that the death only just occurred this week. A woman lost her father. You don't just "get over" something like that and fall back into a normal routine right away. Naturally it's going to take some time for her to respond to you. As for the husband's text, he doesn't speak for her, and maybe he understands that and knows it's not his place to put words in his wife's mouth.
I am not trying to excuse their behavior, but give a possible explanation. When my mother died, there were some friends I didn't even inform until about two weeks later. Some actually called me first to ask how she was doing (she'd been in the hospital for over a month) and I was then forced to tell them right then and there over the phone. I know I should have done it a lot sooner, but it hurt too much to even think about having to tell anyone that my mom was gone.