Posts by lee

31

ist time!

by lee in

i was brought up in the "truth" for over 30 years, mum was too, dad in it since a teenager, they were pioneers, i pioneered, ive left, managed not to be disfellowshipped, i dont believe it, but i love my parents, theyre nice people, victims too, how do i not take it out on them, i have a drink in my hand its how im starting to cope, its hard to deal with right?

am i normal or am i crazy?

i couldnt buy a xmas tree, the guilt, i look over my shoulder every time i buy a birthday card, if i meet an elder i feel frightened and guilty - but i dont believe it!

lee

Well arent i amazed, so many responses, thank you, thank you!! i admit i left the site in a panic the first night - i felt Sooo guilty for even being there, find it diff when the word "cult" is used "that was my life for over 30 years, thats who my parents are, is it really that bad,?" beginning to see I may be in denial! I just dont want to hate everything in it for for sake of it, including my parents, they are victims too and ARE trying to compromise, further than they should as "JWs".

Thanks for your encouraging words not to turn to drink! No alcohol last night - popcorn instead to be honest, i saw all your comments this morning and part of me was so comforted but another part of me judged you for being so angry - i thought i was above you l!! - "im not going to be so immature and negative - thats what weak peple do - get nasty! - i cant trust this" GET THAT! - please someone tel me where to go! for such a judgemental attitude - i apologise now -

am still getting the hang of this site - so hope this gets posted in the right place! thanks again all - xxx

31

ist time!

by lee in

i was brought up in the "truth" for over 30 years, mum was too, dad in it since a teenager, they were pioneers, i pioneered, ive left, managed not to be disfellowshipped, i dont believe it, but i love my parents, theyre nice people, victims too, how do i not take it out on them, i have a drink in my hand its how im starting to cope, its hard to deal with right?

am i normal or am i crazy?

i couldnt buy a xmas tree, the guilt, i look over my shoulder every time i buy a birthday card, if i meet an elder i feel frightened and guilty - but i dont believe it!

lee

Thank you, i dont want to drink myself stupid, i just dont know what i want to do, its not a question i have asked myself much in the past, it was all about what should i be doing to please whoever, did you struggle with confidence or is that just me?

31

ist time!

by lee in

i was brought up in the "truth" for over 30 years, mum was too, dad in it since a teenager, they were pioneers, i pioneered, ive left, managed not to be disfellowshipped, i dont believe it, but i love my parents, theyre nice people, victims too, how do i not take it out on them, i have a drink in my hand its how im starting to cope, its hard to deal with right?

am i normal or am i crazy?

i couldnt buy a xmas tree, the guilt, i look over my shoulder every time i buy a birthday card, if i meet an elder i feel frightened and guilty - but i dont believe it!

lee

hi,

i was brought up in the "truth" for over 30 years, mum was too, dad in it since a teenager, they were pioneers, i pioneered, ive left, managed not to be disfellowshipped, i dont believe it, but i love my parents, theyre nice people, victims too, how do i not take it out on them, i have a drink in my hand its how im starting to cope, its hard to deal with right? am i normal or am i crazy? i couldnt buy a xmas tree, the guilt, i look over my shoulder every time i buy a birthday card, if i meet an elder i feel frightened and guilty - BUT I DONT BELIEVE IT! I KNOW ITS ALL CRAP! - know how im feeling? i have 4 good friends out in the"world" - its taken me ages to think that theyre slightly trustworthy, yet they love me to bits and for whoever i am. It feels so disloyal to my parents, but i hate that religon its inhumane, does this mean anything to anyone on this site?

would be good to talk,