Posts by catlady

13

Letter to JW-Inlaws

by catlady in

jw
friends

i have drafted the following letter to send to my partner?s inlaws & family (with his approval).

this has been an ongoing situation & i am most concerned that his kids are going to hear these lies & this will destroy the pleasant relationship that i have with them.

i'm also getting sick of not defending myself & having to put up with all this endless crap!

PS I'm not some delicate flower who can't handle people talking about her - that's what people do & I accept that. I think it sucks when it's not true but hey, we're all guilty of a bit of gossip now & then. This is just the proverbial 'last straw'. I have put up with so much from these people, from torrents of abuse on the phone from his sister to police being called to our home when the wife decided to report my partner for hitting her (he didn't but she did).

I'm at that point now where enough is enough, it's never going to the Cosby's with these people so I just want to tell them to back off. This is just a good opportunity to do that because it is something reasonably concrete. I can't really write & say stop being mean to me but I can talk about slander.

13

Letter to JW-Inlaws

by catlady in

jw
friends

i have drafted the following letter to send to my partner?s inlaws & family (with his approval).

this has been an ongoing situation & i am most concerned that his kids are going to hear these lies & this will destroy the pleasant relationship that i have with them.

i'm also getting sick of not defending myself & having to put up with all this endless crap!

catlady

Thank you for the feedback so far, this is a very difficult situation for me & it's hard to know what to do.

Panda, about Satan etc, LOL, it is nuts how they go on about that stuff but they have referred to me as the Agent of the Devil since day 1 so my cover was blown a while back!

Background: 'Jane' left 'Tom' for another dub, received a slap over the wrist, that relationship didn't work out but she didn't want to be with Tom anymore. Jane took the kids, got a seperate house & sent an email in Dec 2003 informing him of intent to divorce. Tom set up a new house & we met. Tom's sister drove past his house one morning, saw my car there, found out about us, dobbed him into elders & he got df'd. Tom had been a dub since birth. He went through all that crappy time of being out but realised he was a lot happier. It was difficult because all his friends & family are Borg.

Over the past couple of months it has slowly been implied within the family that I broke up the marriage. Now it has extended into the community as Tom is in the same industry (construction) as his father-in-law & this man has been telling others this version of events. Jane had admitted to the affair, in front of her parents, to Tom so he knows the truth. This is making things awkward for Tom with business &, as I mentioned earlier, with the kids (7 & 9). They recently asked him about it whereas up to now they had been upset with their Mum for leaving their Dad.

I thought that if I sent this out as only defending myself, not Tom, that it will assist both of us. They can't abuse him about it because he can claim that he didn't know (I'm happy for him to do that). If it doesn't work I'd go to a solicitor to get a formal letter - as has been suggested in this thread. It is difficult to prove slander but I was going to copy this letter to every family member as well as head Watchtower office in Aust, head regional elder & head local elder, along with a letter saying, I'm disappointed that JW's are behaving like this! I may as well use their own f*** up religion against them! Ultimately I think this is what will stop them continuing with this garbage - they don't care about the law but they're terrified of the elders.

13

Letter to JW-Inlaws

by catlady in

jw
friends

i have drafted the following letter to send to my partner?s inlaws & family (with his approval).

this has been an ongoing situation & i am most concerned that his kids are going to hear these lies & this will destroy the pleasant relationship that i have with them.

i'm also getting sick of not defending myself & having to put up with all this endless crap!

catlady

I have drafted the following letter to send to my partner?s inlaws & family (with his approval). If any of you have comments/suggestions I would welcome them. This has been an ongoing situation & I am most concerned that his kids are going to hear these lies & this will destroy the pleasant relationship that I have with them. I'm also getting sick of not defending myself & having to put up with all this endless crap!

Dear Mr Smith

RE: DEFAMATION OF CHARACTER

It has come to my attention that you have been making defamatory remarks about me. I refer to the allegations that have been made by members of the Smith, Jones and West families that the marriage breakdown between Tom and Jane was as a result of an ?affair? between myself and Tom. It is my belief that you are all aware of the truth, that Jane ended the marriage for her own reasons. You would also be aware of the fact that the marriage ended in early December, long before Tom and I met and certainly before we became a couple. I will no longer tolerate this defamation of character. If this continues I will be consulting a solicitor and will take legal action.

If I have not received an affirmative response from you by 31 July 2004 indicating that you will cease and desist this fabrication I will have no other option than to pursue this matter to the full extent of the law.

On a personal note, I very much regret that the situation has come to this. I find it inexplicable that people who call themselves ?christian? can indulge in such lies and gossip. In your religion?s own publication: What Does God Require of Us? Lesson 9 states: Clean Speech: 'God's servants must always speak the truth. Liars will not enter God's Kingdom.' (Ephesians 4:25; Revelation 21:8) and Lesson 10 goes on to say: Lying, Gambling, Stealing: 'Jehovah God cannot lie.' (Titus 1:2) 'Persons who want his approval must avoid lying.' (Proverbs 6:16-19; Colossians 3:9, 10).

Yours sincerely

Catlady

16

I wondered why I was not at ease being a Witness.

by PinTail in

i wondered why i was not at ease being a witness till i learned what a cult is from many sorces, and stopped being so scared from day to day what god will do to me.

i am still scared of what he will do to me from being raised a witness, its weird they did not teach a firey hell, but they put the same kind of fear in me.

everytime some national problem comes along i freek, even when i no longer go to them meetings or read the tower.

catlady

had a XXX wax

LOL!

I'm thinking as a 'worldly' girl from birth I should start running a group, maybe the Lost Teens or something, take everyone out & do all the stupid crap that I was doing when I was 18 while you guys were out door knocking & doing other freaky cult shit!

Partner is the same as you, he has a couple of kids or who knows what else he'd be up to. It's very funny to watch him being 'bad', when I first met him he didn't even swear & then when he started to let the occasional choice word slip he'd look like a naughtly little boy! This is the fun side of getting out of the Borg, the freedom to live, be a bit silly, maybe a bit stupid, make mistakes but move on from them.

Will absolutely let you know if we come down your way, I am a huge Swans fan & am hoping to come down for one of the Melbourne games later on in the season. Oh, also, I think Melbourne has a couple of clothes shops doesn't it?!!!

16

I wondered why I was not at ease being a Witness.

by PinTail in

i wondered why i was not at ease being a witness till i learned what a cult is from many sorces, and stopped being so scared from day to day what god will do to me.

i am still scared of what he will do to me from being raised a witness, its weird they did not teach a firey hell, but they put the same kind of fear in me.

everytime some national problem comes along i freek, even when i no longer go to them meetings or read the tower.

catlady

Hi PinTail, welcome to the board.

I have been with my partner since the day he was disfellowshipped (for sleeping with me out of wedlock) & it has been amazing how far he has come in only 3 months. When we first met in February, even though he had real doubts about the Borg & was trying to 'fade', he still said that he couldn't imagine celebrating birthdays or Christmas. In March, after he was df'd he still thought there would be an Armageddon & was guilt-ridden every time we went to bed. By April he was still looking to the Bible to justify things or contradict the dubs. In May he had a birthday party for his kids' & can't wait til his first Christmas.

At the moment it is like he is having his 'worldly' teenage years (he took up smoking - I'm not happy about that!, tried some pot & got the 'adult' channel on pay TV!) after all that repression but is also having a hell of a lot more fun!

Looking at it from the outside, all I can say is it takes time but once your mind starts to expand & you question your previous beliefs it seems to be a very rapid awakening. I think that the hard thing is working out how you cope with all the new knowledge that you gain.

Best of luck & keep coming back to JWD because you get great support here.

Cat

11

Little Women

by Gadget in

what is a cat?.

1. cats do what they want.. 2. they rarely listen to you.. 3. they're totally unpredictable.. 4. when you want to play, they want to be alone.. 5. when you want to be alone, they want to play.. 6. they expect you to cater to their every whim.. 7. they're moody.. 8. they leave hair everywhere.. .

conclusion: they're tiny women in little fur coats.. .

catlady

Yes, yes, yes!

That's why cats rule and dogs drool! (I am a dog lover as well really.) And it also proves God is a woman!

Welcome to JWD Tefcat, go the cat names. (Although you look like a bunny to me!)

6

Defamation: Whore of Babylon - Advice Needed

by catlady in

jw
friends

the family of my partner (beaker) have been telling everybody that they come into contact with that he left his wife for me.

in actual fact his dub wife left him because she was having an affair with his best friend.

she left beaker in early december & we met in march.

catlady

Tacky - Welcome to the Board! Thank you for sharing your story, it is absolutely disgusting what some people do to their kids. I'll get my partner to read your post tonight, he'll definitely be able to relate.

Thank you all for your responses, I'm very stuck at the moment about what to do. It is hard enough to be with somebody when they have children from a previous relationship let alone when there is a whole lot of weird ~~religious~~ cult stuff going on that you have never been exposed to before.

I have been really supportive of my partner & tried to help him through all this but I want to protect me at the moment so that is why I want to send a 'cease and desist' letter. It is basically a letter threatening legal action if these people don't stop sullying my name. I have put up with torrents of verbal abuse from his sister, wife & others & have never been able to defend myself because I haven't wanted to risk my partner being caught in the crossfire. He, however, has never defended me either.

I am so sick of being a scapegoat in all this & I thought that by sending the following letter it may help me at least feel that I am standing up for myself. I was going to cc it to the JW office in Sydney as well, with a separate note saying that this is how their members are representing themselves.

If you have a chance, please read this and see what you think.

Dear Mr XXXX

RE: DEFAMATION OF CHARACTER

It has come to my attention that you have been making defamatory remarks about me. I refer to the allegations that have been made by members of the X, Y and Z families that the marriage breakdown between X and Y was as a result of an ?affair? between myself and X. It is my belief that you are all aware of the truth, that Y ended the marriage for her own reasons. You would also be aware of the fact that the marriage ended in early December, long before X and I met and certainly before we became a couple. I will no longer tolerate this defamation of character. If this continues I will be consulting a solicitor and will take legal action.

If I have not received an affirmative response from you by 31 July 2004 indicating that you will cease and desist this fabrication I will have no other option than to pursue this matter to the full extent of the law.

On a personal note, I very much regret that the situation has come to this. I find it inexplicable that people who call themselves ?christian? can indulge in such lies and gossip. In your religion?s own publication: What Does God Require of Us? Lesson 9 states: Clean Speech: 'God's servants must always speak the truth. Liars will not enter God's Kingdom.' (Ephesians 4:25; Revelation 21:8) and Lesson 10 goes on to say: Lying, Gambling, Stealing: 'Jehovah God cannot lie.' (Titus 1:2) 'Persons who want his approval must avoid lying.' (Proverbs 6:16-19; Colossians 3:9, 10).

Yours sincerely

6

Defamation: Whore of Babylon - Advice Needed

by catlady in

jw
friends

the family of my partner (beaker) have been telling everybody that they come into contact with that he left his wife for me.

in actual fact his dub wife left him because she was having an affair with his best friend.

she left beaker in early december & we met in march.

catlady

The family of my partner (Beaker) have been telling everybody that they come into contact with that he left his wife for me. In actual fact his dub wife left him because she was having an affair with his best friend. She left Beaker in early December & we met in March. When she left he begged her to stay, wanted to go to counselling, etc but she refused & said it was over. The affair ended, she got a slap over the wrist from the elders & is still in 'good standing' with the congregation.

Beaker got majorly depressed, had a couple of suicide attempts & was in hospital for a couple of months. He didn't go back to the organisation after this so his ex has been able to say whatever she has liked about the break-up. And of course, as soon as the elders found out we were together (his sister dobbed him in!), he was disfellowshipped.

I am so, so sick of all this Witness crap and this is just one more thing I don't need. Apart from it being very hurtful & unfair because I am not 'that kind of girl', I am also concerned about what his children think. They are only 7 & 9 and so far we have a good relationship. Their mother doesn't seem to censor what she says around them & has already started to hint that I caused the break-up. Beaker & I are pretty serious with each other and I don't want the kids thinking badly of either myself or him in the future.

I am thinking of sending a 'cease and desist' letter to the 3 main parties involved. Does anybody out there have any advice on this?

Cat

26

Steve Irwin attempts to justify feeding croc with baby in hand.....

by desib77 in

jw
friends

i know we've probably all seen the footage of steve irwin feeding a croc.

while holding his baby in his hands 6 months ago.

now he is trying to say that it is the angle the camera was at.

catlady

The kids live at the park so are around the animals a lot & to me this is just like a kid growing up in the country. His little girl loves animals & I do think it's pretty normal to pass our interests onto our children until they are old enough to develop their own. They have loads of different animals there, like koalas, kangaroos and wombats as well as the reptiles. Here is his daughter (Bindi) with a baby koala - I don't know many kids who wouldn't love to feed this native animal!

I think the thing with his son and the croc was unfortunate but I also agree with him that the camera angle does make it look like he is closer to the croc than he really is. I agree with Abaddon that kids are more at risk with an everyday accident happening than a croc attack - for example, here in Australia over 50% of child drownings occur in a bathtub.

Anyway, here is the article about Steve's antics in the Antartic. Unfortunately, we Aussies have a habit of pulling down our heroes just as fast as we build them up.

21

HELP! Urgent advice needed - Child Custody - JW Mother

by catlady in

jw
friends

my partner ('beaker' on jwd) & i are having rapidly escalating child custody issues.

(see previous thread http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/71815/1.ashx) tonight when the kids (7 & 9 yrs) were dropped back to their mother's she announced that his access was going to be further reduced as of now.. she is very nasty anyway, constantly regeging on previous arrangements & given the borg stuff is also thrown in the mix my partner is going to try for full custody.

the solicitor (who has worked on previous jw cases) we have consulted with does not think we can bring the jw stuff up with a judge.

catlady

Elsewhere - Thank you! I'd heard rumours that this existed, nice to have it in black & white, very interesting info!

Cheers

Cat