chok

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Posts by chok

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  37

  Steaming Angry - Forced to explain Shunning to my 5year old daughter!!!

  by chok in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i am absolutely hopping mad angry!!!!.

  to those of you who know me, you are aware that i have been fading for over a year now.

  i have a daughter who is 5 and a son who is 2 y. in brief iast year i separated from my husband, left the organisation, met someone else and am now expecting with my new partner.. well i have had the usual ups and downs with my jw family.

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  chok

  Thanks Littletoe and all other who were supportive.

  I'll put my rant down to my circumstances and raging pregnant hormones.

  Love Chok

  xxx
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  10

  My Story

  by DocHayes in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  actually i posted my story here one time before... but under a different screen name.

  since then i have forgotten my former screen name, and password.

  the limits of my laziness meant that i would rather create another screen name, and tell my sad, pathetic and uninteresting, story over again.

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  chok

  Welcome DocHayes

  I enjoyed reading your story.

  All the best with your new life.

  Chok
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  48

  congregational cliques

  by chuckyy in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  it was my experience during my 13 yrs as a jw that congregations usually had a social clique.

  in other words, there would be a group of people in a congregation that would only associate (and sometimes only go out on field service too) with people within that social clique.

  if you were in the clique, fine.

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  chok

  Yes I suffered the whole clique thing!

  I'm beginning to think that it exists on here still too! But I guess this is a board of ex-jw's so its to be expected.

  Chok
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  37

  Steaming Angry - Forced to explain Shunning to my 5year old daughter!!!

  by chok in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i am absolutely hopping mad angry!!!!.

  to those of you who know me, you are aware that i have been fading for over a year now.

  i have a daughter who is 5 and a son who is 2 y. in brief iast year i separated from my husband, left the organisation, met someone else and am now expecting with my new partner.. well i have had the usual ups and downs with my jw family.

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  chok

  Thank you to all of you who have offered positive comments.

  I'll be just fine thanks!

  Chok
• 
  37

  Steaming Angry - Forced to explain Shunning to my 5year old daughter!!!

  by chok in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i am absolutely hopping mad angry!!!!.

  to those of you who know me, you are aware that i have been fading for over a year now.

  i have a daughter who is 5 and a son who is 2 y. in brief iast year i separated from my husband, left the organisation, met someone else and am now expecting with my new partner.. well i have had the usual ups and downs with my jw family.

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  chok

  To Wanna and all you others who seem intent on keeping your moral JW highground that you seem so accustomed too.

  I have spent years justifying my actions, making decision to please the powers that be. Marrying for the sake of pleasing parents and others alike. Stuck things out for nine years probably to detriment of my own sanity and the well being of my children.

  I would never put the happiness of my children in second place. You dont know me, or the full extent of my circumstannces and therefore have no right to stand up and judge me.

  I came on this site for support in leaving a cult, not for some comments of people who obviously still think that life should take a certain course and if it deviates from the "perfect" course then you are less of a person.

  My 5 year old daughter, no longer jumps when she hears adults slightly raising their voices, she no longer clings to my legs for comfort and protection. She is happy with the contact she still has with her father, and has settled into a stable family routine with her new step-father. She is also looking forward to the birth of her new brother/sister.

  If you have nothing helpful to say then I suggest you keep your callous comments to yourself. I have judged enough over the years and especially this year to last a lifetime.

  Maybe if you spent less time doing the sums and more time looking at the real issue that I raised you might be able to offer some helpful advice.

  I guess this isnt the forum I thought it was.

  Chok
• 
  37

  Steaming Angry - Forced to explain Shunning to my 5year old daughter!!!

  by chok in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i am absolutely hopping mad angry!!!!.

  to those of you who know me, you are aware that i have been fading for over a year now.

  i have a daughter who is 5 and a son who is 2 y. in brief iast year i separated from my husband, left the organisation, met someone else and am now expecting with my new partner.. well i have had the usual ups and downs with my jw family.

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  chok

  Pintail

  My problems seem to pail into insignifiance after reading your post.

  I dont know how I would cope with that situation, my thoughts are really with you.

  (((((((( Hugs ))))))))

  Chok
• 
  37

  Steaming Angry - Forced to explain Shunning to my 5year old daughter!!!

  by chok in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i am absolutely hopping mad angry!!!!.

  to those of you who know me, you are aware that i have been fading for over a year now.

  i have a daughter who is 5 and a son who is 2 y. in brief iast year i separated from my husband, left the organisation, met someone else and am now expecting with my new partner.. well i have had the usual ups and downs with my jw family.

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  chok

  Hi there upsidedown

  Just read your comments, and your examples made me smile, as I realised how my comments probably looked. Made me look a bit of one right.

  The separation from my husband was an amicable one following years of arguments and wanting totally different things out of life. I wanted children and a family and he missed his single life, and could be quite oppressive. I had quite a turbulant marriage and my family were supportive of me making a fresh start for myself and my children. Up until of course I decided to stop attending the meetings as well. So didnt have an affair and am not bitter in anyway as far my marriage breakup goes.

  I can handle the shunning, I expect it. I know how the organisation works. What I am finding hard to cope with is how that shunning will affect my children. I thought I had considered all areas. Since my separation my children (more noticeable with the eldest) have been far more settled and relaxed, due to being in an less volitile environment. But I hadnt been prepared really for having to cope with their feelings over the shunning side of things.

  I still feel I have made the best decision for them, but I just need to be more emotionally supportive as far as their loss of some family members go.

  Thanks for pointing out how my mail looked...you're right....i didnt give many facts. Probably because I have spoken extensively before to several on here, in the chat room and in person.

  Thanks

  Chok
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  90

  im curious where is everyone from?

  by brokenfairy in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  .

  i am originally from the fort worth/grand prairie area....just curious as to where others have come from?

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  chok

  Nottingham, United Kingdom

  chok

  x
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  12

  which is worse.....?

  by undercover in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  from time to time some of you post letters/emails, etc that you receive from family/friends urging you to come back to the "truth", jehovah, whatever.

  even though the intentions of the sender is misguided, it is apparent that they must have some affection or feeling for you to bother to send the letter.

  others get no letters, no calls, no inquiries.

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  chok

  hmmm, thats a tricky one.

  I have been fading for just over a year, and in that time I have had about 5 letters/cards of encouragement. I dont mind the letters that say we are missing you and it would be nice to see you again. But I do get annoyed when I get cards saying how upset I am making my parents, because I think that just starts going down the whole emotional blackmail line, which is wrong!

  A lot of time when my parents mention people now asking for me, I just say "Well I havent moved! They know where I live".

  Funny, noone seems to remember my address.

  Chok
• 
  37

  Steaming Angry - Forced to explain Shunning to my 5year old daughter!!!

  by chok in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i am absolutely hopping mad angry!!!!.

  to those of you who know me, you are aware that i have been fading for over a year now.

  i have a daughter who is 5 and a son who is 2 y. in brief iast year i separated from my husband, left the organisation, met someone else and am now expecting with my new partner.. well i have had the usual ups and downs with my jw family.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chok

  I am absolutely hopping mad angry!!!!

  To those of you who know me, you are aware that I have been fading for over a year now. I have a daughter who is 5 and a son who is 2 y. In brief Iast year I separated from my husband, left the organisation, met someone else and am now expecting with my new partner.

  Well I have had the usual ups and downs with my JW family. My parents have decided that they will continue to talk to me (although they are pushing me to disassociate myself - to make things easier for them). My younger brother and his wife though havent had much contact with me, and up until today I wasnt sure what their decision was.

  Well today I was out shopping with my 2 children when I saw my sister in law with her baby daughter (my niece) a visiting JW friend. She looked at me, I looked at her and was abouts to say hello, when she turned away from me. I started to walk on, realising she was shunning me and hoping my daughter hadnt spotted her aunty and cousin. But she had, and started getting excited and pointing to go and talk to her. I had to steer her away and explain in as kind and brief way as possible that her aunty and uncle would not be talking to me, because I dont go to the meetings anymore. Her immediate reaction was whether her grandparents would still talk to her. I reassured her that they will and she was relieved at this, and seemed to take it quite well. I just hope they dont change their minds.

  But I am so angry...what sort of crackpot, evil kind of religion is this!!!?!?!?!?!?! Love of thy neighbour, they havent got a friggin clue what love is!

  I need to calm down...I keep getting really stressed over so many incidents, which I know is not good in my condition...but I am so ANGRY!

  Chok