Fleur

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Posts by Fleur

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  20

  Can you believe you followed this stuff and believed it?

  by wizedup in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my husband and i amuse each other with recollections of the "spiritual" language, sometimes with tears of laughter.

  we sometimes gasp at the thought we took all that stuff so seriously for nearly 40 and 33 years.

  every meeting, we had to be there, listening to the demands for obedience, loyalty,and submission.

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  Fleur

  I just wanted to clarify that I don't look down on anyone who became a JW as an adult...they definitely know how to make the package sound appealing, they are great at sales and love-bombing and then by the time a person figures out what is really going on there is really no graceful way to exit in most cases.

  They talk a good game...they hit on all emotional buttons...prey on those who are vulnerable because they've lost people or are alone...there are a million reasons that people buy what they sell, and no one should ever feel down on themselves for having believed.

  People believe a lot of things...some hold those beliefs till they die. Everyone is different.

  Just felt I needed to clarify because I didn't want to offend anybody.

  love

  essie
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  20

  Can you believe you followed this stuff and believed it?

  by wizedup in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my husband and i amuse each other with recollections of the "spiritual" language, sometimes with tears of laughter.

  we sometimes gasp at the thought we took all that stuff so seriously for nearly 40 and 33 years.

  every meeting, we had to be there, listening to the demands for obedience, loyalty,and submission.

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  Fleur

  What is really entertaining is to tell my never a JW husband some of the stuff for the first time and watch his reaction to it. When he says "How can anyone ever believe that?" I say "hey, don't look at me, they had me as a zygote."
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  40

  You DON'T Have To Listen To The Elders If They Say They Want To Meet ....

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  everyone that is in the process of leaving dreads the thought of having the elders approach them, call them, etc.

  the fact is----just because they say they want to meet with you or just because 2 elders stop by to visit you----you don't have to deal with them at all.

  simply tell them you won't meet with them, you won't talk to them.

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  Fleur

  Holy Cow, special K! They sent you a letter!?!

  I demanded that they inform me in writing of their decision but that I would not meet with them, and they never sent me anything. They just announced that I'd been df'd.

  I'm amazed that they did that!

  Along with the original post...honestly, don't fear them, don't give them the satisfaction of humliating you for any reason. They have no right to judge, they are just as human as anyone else is.

  I have no regrets for skipping the whole ugly affair. They were going to df me either way.
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  18

  A husband can divorce his wife, but a wife can't divorce her husband?

  by hubert in

  1. social
  2. family

  this is the way i seem to understand it, in the j.w.

  cult, from many posts that i've read.

  am i reading this right?

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  Fleur

  I notice that the "brothers" tend to encourage JW wives to take the abuse and unhappiness and stay; while the JW husbands are told that that if their wife does not have sex with them they are not held very accountable if they commit adultery.

  Yup. That pretty much sums it up.

  And they told me I should "be a better wife and pray more" and not "be like Job's wife."

  I'd like to tell them now where they can stuff their watchtowers...
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  20

  Can you believe you followed this stuff and believed it?

  by wizedup in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my husband and i amuse each other with recollections of the "spiritual" language, sometimes with tears of laughter.

  we sometimes gasp at the thought we took all that stuff so seriously for nearly 40 and 33 years.

  every meeting, we had to be there, listening to the demands for obedience, loyalty,and submission.

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  Fleur

  ...that the judicial arrangement is a protection for the congregation and that they are given holy spirit to decide on matters.

  The judicial 'arrangement' is nothing but a big fat blind behind which the guilty hide. They play at being 'repentant' and get to stay in, and the victimized get the boot.

  Insanity.
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  33

  busted by a fake evergreen tree

  by cab1000 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my wife and i have not been to a meeting for well over a year.

  we are not disfellowshipped, but would be if we admitted to the elders what we've been up to, mainly smoking.

  we was both born and raised in the "truth".

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  Fleur

  I went through my phase of excusing Witness people and blaming the "organization" too. I thought about it and I have not really been harmed by any "organization". All my scars were made by people. People I used to care about so I was vulnerable to them. Now I am holding the individuals responsible and I am not excusing them any longer and I am notifying them that it's not okay and I am not shifting responsibility over to any business. They get off easy when they are not held responsible.
  
  The "Organization" is an abstract idea. I'm not aware of one person who can define and identify the components. It's like a cloud . . . almost not real . . . it's just a concept we were sold. People are real. Rejection is real and abuse is real. GaryB

  Amen to that.

  (((((((((lovesdubs)))))))))) and ((((((((((Cab))))))))))
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  19

  We're not Suitable!

  by Gill in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  my husband and myself used to be witnesses, but not for quite a long while now.

  every last member of both our families are witnesses so i guess we're the proverbial black sheep, but we haven't been disfellowshiped or have me disassociated, just drifted quietly away.. my husbands grandfather, who is ninety-seven now, suffered a stroke a year ago.

  he spent several months in hospital.

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  Fleur

  Gill, I am so sorry for your troubles. I have been through similiar situations with my family, and they are just heartbreaking.

  Sending you hugs and hopes that somehow you get to bring Grandpa home.

  essie
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  21

  Why didn't we help these women?

  by Tatiana in

  1. social
  2. current

  in the eastern democratic republic of the congo, women are enduring unspeakable acts of violence while the world remains largely unaware.

  "they cut me with knives and machetes.

  then they asked my sons to hold my legs and hands apart and started raping me--all eight of them.

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  Fleur

  These stories break my heart. There are some there locally who are trying to help these women and young girls. The problem is so huge, but at least they are trying one woman at a time to help.

  Check this out:

  http://www.fistulahospital.org/

  and it's disgusting but it is true, that since there are no riches to be had by the US in these countries, our government won't get involved. It's the same thing with the pharmaceutical companies and the cost of AIDS drugs. Why should they reduce the cost of AIDS drugs and make more and more of them for those in poorest countries when they can rake in money hand over fist making Viagra and Cialis instead?

  Revolting, how complacent our society is. Eve Ensler (who wrote the Vagina Monologues) is interviewed in Glamour magazine this month and has a new book out I think it's called The Good Body. I really want to read it. She believes that women are the ultimate force for good in the world and that if they could just spend a quarter of the time and money they devote to 'fixing' their physical selves to look 'better' that they could truly change the world. It's quite a concept.

  Sadly, this abuse of women world wide continues because the world population, in general, permits it. Heartbreaking. Death would be too good for those who perpetrate crimes like these.

  love,

  essie
• 
  56

  Are You Surprised As To How You Are Now That You're Out of The "Truth"?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  since we were indoctrinated that those leaving the organiztion had their lives turn into sh*t until they "returned to jehovah (the organization), how would you say things have turned out--so far?

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  Fleur

  I know that most of my family is shocked that I'm not an AIDS infected crack-wh***...

  Me, my life is a million times better out than it was in. I can finally be who I am, and give people the choice to take or leave that. Many chose to leave it and stick with the Borg, but those friends and family I have acquired since leaving really know me, accept me, and love me for who I am.

  That's something I will never be willing to give up again. Not to mention, the joy I have in watching my child blossom and turn into the human she is meant to be without guilt ruling her life. That is truly living and even if the eternal/multicultural never-ending petting-zoo picnic scenerio were real, I wouldn't give this up for that.
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  14

  Another reason to hate the WTS.

  by CountryGuy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  you know what i hate most about the wts?

  that no matter how much you think you've put it all behind you... it still comes up and smacks you over the head every now and then.

  saturday night, i visited my local bookstore/coffee shop.

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  Fleur

  Awww, Country Guy. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I've been there...believe me.

  ((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))

  love,

  essie