Well, my family is on the fifth generation now of WTS domination. Yup, My great-grandparent's great-great grandchildren are growing up and blossoming into fine Drones of the Bor...er...Witnesses of Jah TM (still can't do that cool TM thing though Scully has explained it to me 1000 times!)
This is the thing. My JW childhood sucked, but not in the "they dragged me to every stinking meeting and made me go in service whether I wanted to or not". Nope. Mine was a different kind of JW childhood hell.
I remember getting smacked at the hall, but smacked more at home. My father was considered rebellious in the congregation and was always getting into trouble for one thing or another. Independent thinking, I believe was what they called it most of the time. I remember once he tossed the Circuit Overseer out of our house. They came for a 'meeting' with him and my mother about my dad's 'attitude'. My sisters and I huddled in the basement on a daybed, listening to the voices escalate upstairs. Then, abruptly, it was over.
My dad stopped going to meetings altogether and was even said to have apostate thinking in some circles; I remember having a 'discussion' with him when I was 17 and trying to convince him he was mistaken that the governing body didn't have all the best intentions when it came to caring for the flock. I went to the elders and asked them what I should do about my dad. They said, don't discuss spiritual things with him anymore. So I didn't.
My parent's disasterous marriage was the problem more than the religion per se in my childhood. I know though that it was pressures of the religion that created many of those rifts between my parents. I also did get beat up at school for being JW. I did listen to my mother complain that my father wasn't "Taking the lead" she still does. I was branded as being from a 'weak' family no matter how much time I put in or how many jobs I volunteered for...assuring that none of the JW boys I wanted to date would accept my spiritual pedigree. Course, half of them ran off with 'worldly' girls anyway LOL.
He still believes in the Bible, in Christianity, that the end is coming. He thinks that there will be a lot of surprises though about who God chooses to save and he's not very judgemental of people. My mother can't figure out how the 'one' child of hers who was always first up for meetings, volunteered at every Assembly and so loyal as a teen has been 'away from the flock' so long.
My dad wonders if he made a mistake teaching me to think for myself. I never thought that was what he was doing, but I realize now that he was. I'm glad he did.
My child will not be among the rest of the 5th generation of my family to become mindless drones, doing what the family does just because they do it. She has my unconditional love, and that is something no JW can offer her.
I hope it'll be enough.
So much more to say...but nothing to say. I think it's all been said. I think of all those the WTS hurts, the children really suffer the most. I think it was Lincoln who said something like 'surely a child's worries are small, but so is the child." How huge are the worries of children who think they better not eat the birthday cupcake at school or the birds will pick the flesh off their bones. How a loving parent could paint that picture for their child...I will never know. The Jehovah of the bible is just a bit too bloodthirsty for me, thanks very much. He'll just have to get along without this duck in the pen.
~essie
