AvailableLight

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Posts by AvailableLight

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  20

  What should I do??? Help!!

  by Delite2k in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i'm a non-jw dating a jw male ( for three months now) and he treats me like a woman should be treated.

  he's the best i've ever been with...ya know what i mean?

  !......we have sex when and where we can (receintly at the job

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  AvailableLight

  Butalbee-

  How do you pronounce your username, anyway?

  I want to say two things in response to your post: 1.) I appreciate and empathize with what you have been through. 2.) "Active" witnesses are very capable of leading a double life, i.e. having sex outside of marriage and keeping it a secret. There most definitely are differing degrees of religious conviction among JWs. From an outsider's perspective this may be difficult to accept because they all *seem* so indoctrinated. But believe me, many of the kids I grew up with and many others I have known over the years had sex before they were married.

  In some of their cases, they simply got caught up in the heat of the moment, and as you mention, felt tremendous guilt afterwards. Some others on the other hand have sought non-JW sexual partners and kept it secret.

  I would not say the the above examples are extremely common, as they are not. But it does indeed happen.
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  20

  What should I do??? Help!!

  by Delite2k in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  i'm a non-jw dating a jw male ( for three months now) and he treats me like a woman should be treated.

  he's the best i've ever been with...ya know what i mean?

  !......we have sex when and where we can (receintly at the job

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  AvailableLight

  How active are you as a baptist? How important are your religious beliefs to you? Do you believe the doctrines of your religion or do you simply carry the label as family tradition?

  These questions are important to ask. The JW religion is different than many other Christian religions with regard to how strictly it enforces its rules - especially with regard to sexual relationships outside of marriage.

  Go back and *memorize* Abaddon's post. It is dead-on accurate. Be careful about attacking the JW religion. Generally, JWs are pre-conditioned to view such attacks as coming directly from Satan. If your boyfriend buys into this idea and you attack, you may alienate him from communicating honestly with you.

  Instead, try to ask sincere questions - just as you have here. Try to find out where he stands within the three scenarios Abaddon outlined.

  If he does intend to continue his life as a JW, then he will likely try to keep his relationship with you a secret. Will you be able to handle this?

  If you do sincerely love him and begin to think long-term, you need to be aware of the issues that lay ahead if he decides to remain a JW: How will you handle birthdays and holidays? If you had children, how would you raise them? It may seem completely premature to think about these possibilities at this point in your relationship, but it is better to start thinking about them now before your emotional attachment to this person becomes too great.

  One last thing: I don't know what your or his age is, but it would be helpful to know if he is baptized or not. If he is, then all comments made in this thread apply as is. If he is not, then things change a little bit. Baptized JWs do not consider individuals who have not been baptized as JWs true members, even if such individuals call themselves JWs. Unbaptized individuals are not subject to the same level of discipline as baptized JWs, and cannot be disfellowshipped, even for fornication or adultery. However, some may treat them as disfellowshipped if such behavior becomes known.

  I wish you happiness.
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  25

  Speaking in Tongues

  by AvailableLight in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so what's the deal with this?

  are those that have this ability just nuts?

  possessed?

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  AvailableLight

  Good post JT.

  My personal feelings on the matter lean towards a mental/emotional cause, especially after reading some of your experiences.

  On the other hand, I'm not ready to rule out any supernatural cause, I accept the *possibility* that some supernatural realm exists. What that is exactly or whether or not it is dangerous are questions I haven't really answered yet, and it is probable that my strong JW background plays a large role in my feelings on this matter.

  I find what LB said both funny and interesting: gibberish is gibberish. Of what value is some "spiritual gift" that has highly questionable (if any) meaning for the recipient?

  Why would God transmit a message in such cryptic fashion? Something doesn't add up...
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  10

  The MicroManaged Flock

  by metatron in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  one of the things that would frustrate and offend me as an.

  elder was the society's endless presumption that they could.

  micromanage their way out of trouble.

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  AvailableLight

  Interesting points and a true assessment.

  The difference now though seems to be a very slow, gradual shift in power from the GB to the legal and other deptartment. It will be fascinating to see what kind of changes come about in time.

  I can't help but wonder what the org. will be like when the GB members have passed away and non-anointed "brothers" are running the show. I would imagine that may ruffle the feathers of those who sincerely profess to be of the anointed and attend congregations.

  Of course, Brooklyn doesn't really believe that there are over 8000 left, and it's generally accepted by the "spiritually strong" that most of the 8,000 who claim anointing are from regions in the world such as parts of Africa where people are uneducated and aren't capable of fully understanding the "deep things of the scriptures." That attitude will likely infect the up and coming leaders who'll be out of the other sheep class.
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  25

  Speaking in Tongues

  by AvailableLight in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so what's the deal with this?

  are those that have this ability just nuts?

  possessed?

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  AvailableLight

  So what's the deal with this? Have you ever seen anyone do it? Done it yourself?

  Are those that have this ability just nuts? Possessed? Faking? Can they do at will or does it just hit happen at random?

  Lately I've been kind of struggling with ideas related to the supernatural and what seem to be supernatural abilities in humans. I always accepted the JW doctrines regarding demons, but now have to question them as I question everything else.

  What do you think?
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  24

  AWAKE!!!! Godsmacks new CD!

  by TR in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  funny that it's called awake!.

  check out their website:.

  http://www.godsmack.com/.

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  AvailableLight

  Tink - never heard the Lars Ulrich rumor you just suggested, I'd say it's suspect though I agree that lyrically "The Unforgiven" could refer to the pressure of being forced to fit the JW mould. Still, it's pretty general and could just as easily be taken to be about pressure to conform to some standard.

  TR - Ever hear of Dream Theater? If not, check out a song called "The Glass Prison" for something that truly rocks. It should be available on any of the popular file-sharing apps.

  Interesting aside - DT is on tour and has recently covered Metallica's "Master of Puppets" album in its entirety at special shows when playing a second night in a given city. I've got bootlegs. Completely kick-ass! At a Barcelona show, it was amazing to hear the audience *sing along to the entire album.* How that many natively Spanish speaking people knew all the words to a classic American metal album is beyond me, but incredible nonetheless.
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  33

  Who remembers Cake Nights?

  by 2SYN in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  <fluff> .

  at the book studies?

  they were the highlight of the month.. thing is, all the sisters would try to outdo each other making nice food, which amused me no end, and also kept my stomach filled up, but drove me nuts, because my mother would spend the entire afternoon making a giant racket in the kitchen and screaming @ my sister whilst doing it, just to bake a cool cake for the book study.. also, remember those last ~15 minutes before the end of cake night book studies?

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  AvailableLight

  In every hall I've been in "Goodie Night" as it's always been called was left up to the host of the BS. Generally this would occur once a month in those groups that elected to have it and everyone would bring something.

  In one group I attended, the hosts really didn't like having a "Goodie Night" at all (they probably just wanted everyone to leave - which I can understand). One dangerously obese sister in the group would always whisper in kid's ear just before the closing prayer and have the kid raise his hand to put the conductor on the spot and ask when we'd be having another GN. Embarassed and probably annoyed, the conductor would then schedule one. That family never brought *a single item* to contribute.

  Good times... [8>]
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  25

  Watchtower says Dos and Don'ts are out

  by ozziepost in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  among the latest instructions to the rank and file witnesses is this one:.

  "following bible principles, we will avoid trying to live (or demand others to live) by an extensive and rigid set of dos and don'ts that go beyond the teachings of the bible.

  " (the watchtower - issue of april 15,2002, page 22, para 15).

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  AvailableLight

  Oz,

  Was this in a study article?
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  26

  Will the real butalbee please stand up...

  by butalbee in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  late last night i was messing around w/ my quick cam on my computer, it takes horrible pics, but okay, this is the real me: .

  .

  hehe.

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  AvailableLight

  Bee,

  One other thing: Did you ever post your story here? If you did I missed it and I think it'd be interesting to read.

  If it has been posted, drop a link in this thread for those of us who've missed it to check out.

  Thanks!
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  26

  Will the real butalbee please stand up...

  by butalbee in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  late last night i was messing around w/ my quick cam on my computer, it takes horrible pics, but okay, this is the real me: .

  .

  hehe.

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  AvailableLight

  LB - I'm a man. Just thought you might like to know that before you cast any propositions.

  Bee - I have to admit, I'd read some of your posts that seemed to me to have a pretty agressive tone (not *necessarily* a bad thing, but not necessarily good either). That coupled with the original picture you were using on here...

  Well I had you pegged as the stalker type. I'm not even sure if that was a real pic of you or not, the new one doesn't seem to look anything like it to me. But then again, take that with a grain of salt. I masturbate often and my vision is poor.

  Seriously - you look very attractive in those newer pics - and far less psychotic. Previously, the combination of you, sharp objects, and the genitals of any man you were pissed at would have seriously scared me. But that's all changed now.

  And I do enjoy your posts - so don't take anything said here *too* seriously.

  "If I seem superhuman I have been misunderstood"