Posts by mamochan13

30

The Myths of Disfellowshipping

by Londo111 in

jj allowed me to send him an article for jwstruggle.

i know this might not be everyone's cup of tea on jwn, and i hope this doesn't smack of self-promotion, which i find distasteful, but i hope it might bring comfort to some who have found themselves the victims of judicial committees.

http://www.jwstruggle.com/2012/08/the-myths-of-disfellowshipping/.

mamochan13

Londo, your myths are spot on.

For a long time I didn't know why I felt so disoriented after being reinstated. Then I realized it was because while I was DFd, I had been told repeatedly that I was a nonrepentant practicer of sin who had to be removed to protect the rest of the congregation from being contaminated. They told my children I was not allowed to have a Bible study with them or talk to them about anything related to the religion, even though I had been faithfully teaching them "the truth" from the time they were born.

AFter I was reinstated, I realized that they had lied. I had been put through hell by three men who did not know who I was inside. I was the same person I had always been. I was not an unrepentent sinner, nor was I a danger to the congregation. Never had been. I had been the most faithful of the faithful, following all the rules. But I was lonely and discouraged. Many times I tried to get help and encouragement from the elders, but they never had time for me. In fact, when they called me to set up a meeting to DF me, they didn't even tell me it was a judicial meeting. I went in there thinking I was finally going to get some shepherding help. What a surprise.

I attended the meeting the night they announced it because I wanted to show my humility and desire to remain in the congregation. They were angry and told me to leave, that I was being disrespectful. I requested reinstatement two months later for the same reason. They were angry and told me I was being disrespectful because I had to wait at least a year. It didn't matter what I did, they interpreted it the way they wanted to.

I know many who had the same experience. I was the same person before and after being DF and reinstated. I was a faithful believer of the religion. Nothing had changed. But three men had the power to destroy my life by telling everyone something different about me. It was like Monday I was a faithful witness in good standing. Tuesday I was an unrepentent evildoer. By the time the weekend came around, they had decided I was a faithful witness again. When I realized that, I knew I wanted no part of being a JW anymore.

I just want to reiterate your two key myths about disfellowshipping:

1. The elders make subjective decisions on repentance and they are mainly guided by personal opinion.

2. Most who are DF'd are good, faithful witnesses in everything else except the offence related to being DFd. They are not actively trying to turn the rest of the congregation to wrongdoing.

14

Another Facepalm - "Higher Education Wastes Valuable Youth Years"

by God_Delusion in

hi guys,.

if you've been following my posts on here, you'll know that i've recently been fascinated by the april 15th 2008 study edition of the watchtower magazine - namely the 'repudiate valueless things' article.. here are my previous posts on this masterpiece of watchtower propaganda:.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/watchtower/beliefs/230616/1/going-beyond-what-is-written-in-the-biblehttp://www.jehovahs-witness.net/watchtower/bible/230643/1/how-could-i-have-not-realise-i-was-in-a-cult-for-all-that-timeif there were awards for the most in-your-face brainwashing, this article must surely be up there.. anyway, in the 'repudiate valueless things' article, the watchtower society decided to add their bit on higher education.

mamochan13

The WT anti-university/education is another extremely harmful doctrine. It has damaged the lives of many young people over the years, mine included. I have struggled financially all my life, and now I'm trying to save my home of 30 years from foreclosure, all because I "chose" to pioneer instead of going to university. In the years I was in high school, the Society was actually pushing young people to drop out of high school because the end was near. They deny it now, of course. It sickens me to see articles like this that continue to tell young people they are wasting their time by pursuing education.

Like many ex-JWs, I finally went to university as an adult, but it's ridiculously difficult to find success when you are competing with university graduates half your age (not to mention the debt). Of course, my university experience did alow me to discover the truth about why the WT is against it. As Glenster points out - what an eye-opener!

2

Opinion Piece says JWs and Catholics Hurt Child Health Care

by mamochan13 in

http://www.edmontonjournal.com/opinion/religious+intervention+hurt+child+health+care/7110455/story.html.

mamochan13

Thanks, Andersons - I tried to post the article in text but didn't do it right, apparently.

I like how the authors have pointed out the JW use of 50-year-old medical material to support their beliefs. I also can't help but wonder if JWs are not also against HPV vaccinations.

Edited: Oops. I accidently posted this same info twice. Forgot I did it late last night on another thread. Old age taking its toll.

52

Born-ins (childhood memories)

by tornapart in

as a born in, or in at a very young age, what were your worst memories as a young jw child?.

i remember not being allowed to go to sleep in the meetings when i was tired.

not being allowed to do lots of things at school other kids could do.

mamochan13

Pistoff - your comment about crowds going after new releases triggered something I had completely forgotten. When they released the "insight on the Scriptures" they had limited quantities. So they announced that it would be limited to one per head of the household. When I got to the front of the line I was told that I couldn't have one, since the head of the household had to be male. Of course they all knew I was a single parent raising four small children on my own.

28

New Arrival Chez Grundy

by Joe Grundy in

jw
friends

dear friends.

i am delighted to announce that after a difficult conception, a longer than hoped for gestation period, a higher cost than i had hoped for, and all the associated gubbins, the delivery was successful:.

my divorce decree absolute!.

mamochan13

Joe, my personal philosophy is rooted in Neitzche - "that which does not kill me makes me stronger." We can take something of value from every experience, no matter how difficult that experience is.

Sorry you've had to go through this. Being used and betrayed by someone you love is a horrible thing to experience. I hope you can continue to gain strength from it and move forward. Sounds like you are well on your way already.

2

Opinion Piece says JWs and Catholics Hurt Child Health Care

by mamochan13 in

http://www.edmontonjournal.com/opinion/religious+intervention+hurt+child+health+care/7110455/story.html.

mamochan13

http://www.edmontonjournal.com/opinion/Religious+intervention+hurt+child+health+care/7110455/story.html

15

Whatever happened to Watchtower Comments?

by braincleaned in

jw
friends

it saddens me that watchtower comments has been absent online for the past 3 years!

what the hell happened?

anyone knows?.

mamochan13

I think what Randy says is very important and true. We go through cycles of loss when we leave the JWs, very similar to what happens when someone we love dies. For a time we feel anger and the need to justify our separation, which motivates many to perform the kind of excellent services Watchtower Comments provided. But once we have worked through our anger or whatever emotion we feel against the JW organization, at some point we need to move on with our lives.

I also want to say thank you to Randy and others who have done and continue to do so much to help us when we leave. It was around 10 years ago when I first came across Randy's site and I was still in a transitional time. What I read there really helped me sort through what I felt.

D

1

perception of JWs on health matters

by mamochan13 in

http://www.edmontonjournal.com/opinion/religious+intervention+hurt+child+health+care/7110455/story.html.

jws would hate to know they are being equated with catholics!!

but interesting observation on the validity of their blood excuse..

mamochan13

http://www.edmontonjournal.com/opinion/Religious+intervention+hurt+child+health+care/7110455/story.html

JWs would hate to know they are being equated with Catholics!! But interesting observation on the validity of their blood excuse.

52

Born-ins (childhood memories)

by tornapart in

as a born in, or in at a very young age, what were your worst memories as a young jw child?.

i remember not being allowed to go to sleep in the meetings when i was tired.

not being allowed to do lots of things at school other kids could do.

mamochan13

yeah, I remember the lecithin thing. We were not allowed to eat red licorice for that reason.

And I was at the Vancouver 8-day marathon, too.

I remember not being allowed to go to my father with any issues because he was not a dub and if I were to share anything I might have done or thought that was non-JW approved, it would have reflected badly on the religion. So he was always a stranger to me. Still is.

I remember having to sit during a Memorial Day celebration and having the teacher reprimand me afterwards. She told me her husband and son had been killed in the war and she couldn't understand why I would not want to show respect for that.

I remember feeling obnoxiously self righteous and superior. We had the truth after all. We could behave any way we liked. I wish I could slap myself now for how I must have behaved at times.

35

A thread for those who have no support system or a place to go due to shunning.

by ohiocowboy in

jw
friends

reading the recent thread about the young lady who just ended her life got me thinking that maybe there could be a thread that is easily accessible to anyone who may need help due to homelessness from losing their families and friends to shunning.

too often i hear stories about people who have lost everything, and have no where to go, and at the same time having no type of support system.

unfortunately there are some who are so lost that they feel that there are no options besides taking their own life.. i think that a website that matches people in need to others who can help in some way would be a great idea.

mamochan13

OhioCowboy, thanks for starting this thread. Over the past few days I've been thinking about all the suggestions everyone here has made, all the ideas for ways to help. And I decided that privacy and trying to stay below the radar is less important than putting a name to this and maybe finally finding a way to help all those vulnerable young people who are being destroyed by JW shunning. So her name is Jaimie. A beautiful little girl, gone far too soon, a victim of evil religious dogma.

I think a Facebook page would be a wonderful way to start, and maybe build from there. A link to a database of people who are willing to offer a room or anything in need. It would have to be done carefully, as there are people who will take advantage, of course.

I believe it's also important to really keep things low key when it comes to promoting any anti-JW sentiment. I know when I was DF'd I still believed all the propaganda and would have never accepted help from a perceived apostate. I even had trouble talking with psychologists because I thought I was bringing "reproach upon Jehovah" by telling them the truth about shunning and other stuff. Each time the psychologists would express shock and outrage I would start to defend the religion. So it's a fine line. I would suggest a help page needs to be simply that. "been DF'd (or shunned) and feeling alone? We care and are willing to help you get through this, no matter what has brought you here and where you choose to go afterwards." It is support and help, nothing more.