The way to get respect from these elders is to join another church because only then will there power be broken.
The reason I say this is I know of an incident where a JW couple separated and the elders supported the wife. The elders came down hard on the husband so the husband left and joined the SDA church. When the elders found out about this they went to meet with the husband and their attitude was changed completly. You see they no longer had power over him and they knew it.