Actually, one more thing. When we were about 6 months out one of the elders finally came by. He's "one of the annointed" and a lovely man. He told me he couldn't leave as he had helped 61 people into the "Truth" (I wasn't asking him to). The thing I won't forget is this:
A long-time brother at Bethel had told him that "the brothers would not be able to stand the changes to come".
At the time, I just thought it strange, just JW folklore about "special knowledge". But on reflection it seems to me this comment came from someone who KNEW the truth about "the Truth". It was bogus. And his position was to assume that it was better not to tell The Truth, but that is best for the R&F not to know.
That is controlling information to keep people in line, and that is EVIL.