Posts by bikerchic

25

Soooo not out! Talking to an ex-jw...

by detective in

well, i damn near put my foot in it this evening.

a friend of mine who is well aware of my continuing friendship with a jw (now allegedly ex-jw) told me i should meet an ex-jw that he knows.

i felt pretty excited about meeting an ex-jw face to face as i've longed for a chance to speak honestly with someone who knows the organization well and my friend isn't ready to really discuss the issues yet.

bikerchic

Hi Detective,

I did gather from your original post that you are a caring person, and am more convienced of it now, but I stand convience thru trial and error that you can lead a horse to water....bla,bla,bla! I wish I had a dollar for everytime I tried to change another person! TIC

I have to preface this by saying I lived with a gay man for 6 months, sorta a "Will & Grace" situation, we were and still are great friends, but I did and still continue to learn a lot about the "gay" lifestyle and basicly people are people and are like you said she must be a very conflicted woman, which I'm sure she is. I've discussed the whole religion thing with my friend and his "coming out" and how he feels about religion. Granted he wasn't raised in the borg, which must be really horrible to overcome all the crap from that, it's a hard lifestyle to say the least, add the condemnation from the JW's and it makes it that much harder. When I told him about how the dubs view everything he and I had gone thru, he was glad he didn't have that stigma to overcome too, his family was very accepting of his lifestyle.

As for your other friend, all I can say is he is a lucky person to have a friend like you, and you are in a small way pointing him in the direction, just be patient we all have our own paths to take and it's always nice to know that someone cares especially when the people you thought "loved" you because you're family turn you away.

bc

25

Soooo not out! Talking to an ex-jw...

by detective in

well, i damn near put my foot in it this evening.

a friend of mine who is well aware of my continuing friendship with a jw (now allegedly ex-jw) told me i should meet an ex-jw that he knows.

i felt pretty excited about meeting an ex-jw face to face as i've longed for a chance to speak honestly with someone who knows the organization well and my friend isn't ready to really discuss the issues yet.

bikerchic

Decetive, it has long ago been my experience that while people and their problems can be at the very least entertaining and you can turn yourself inside out trying to convince them of a better or different way, it's a lot of time wasted. IMHO. There is nothing you can do to make anyone change themselves. You can only point them in a direction and maybe light the road, but the trip is still up to them. Sometimes they just aren't ready to make the trip. The best way you can help them is to live your life in harmony with what you believe, maybe they will see that you have a better way and want to know more about it, in that case let them know you are here for the guidance.

I felt pretty excited about meeting an ex-JW face to face as I've longed for a chance to speak honestly with someone who knows the organization well and my friend isn't ready to really discuss the issues yet.

Even after that statement I failed to see where you spoke honestly about organizational issues. Granted there was a lot of conversation we weren't privy to, or was there?

What I was struck by was how deeply entrenched in the ideas people can be, even several years after leaving.

You have to know that for most of us it's the brainwashing and stigma of the "Apostacy" label, I myself won't come out to my JW relatives because I still want a relationship with them. My way of "sticking it" to the WTS, passive agressive I know, chicken also, but I have family members who would be totally devastated and think of me as dead and I just cannot do this to them in their few years remaining on this earth, or mine. Life is just too short, too precious to spend time arguing over the policies of the brainwashed dubs.

I felt bad for her because, as you said, she can't go back if she's going to live her life with a same sex partner but at the same time she's convinced that the organization is right. My friend is straight, so I end up thinking that as long as he doesn't research the teachings he might end up wanting to go back at some point

jjrizo said it best:

Its amazing she's so loyal being that she's gay.
IMHO she's mentally punishing herself for her gay life style, because if she was truly gay and loved it she wouldn't have anything to do with the Jw's.
By siding with the Jw's she is undermining herself, because if the Jw's are right on any issue, than she's wrong, simple as that.

and onacruise said in a nutshell what I said above:

I think we all tend to hold onto what we have, even when our instincts tell us that it is disadvantageous, or even dangerous, to do so. E.g., how many people who have lived in an abusive relationship, when finally freed from that relationship, turn right around and take up with another abuser?

The only answer is to live your life, to live it well and be honorable to your beliefs. As the saying goes, "you can leave a horse to water but you can't make it drink." It sounds like you are a very concerned person, but your friends will have to find their way as we all are in this enlightenment of the JW conspiricy. I wish you luck in showing them the road.

bc

"Life is like a ten speed bicycle, we all have gears we never use." Charles Schultz

76

best song of all time

by Cowboy in

ok here's your chance...not neccesarily your favorite,but what you think is the best one....one vote apiece please... .

mine is he stopped loving her today by george jones...i love the sentiment,that he loved her til the day he died.

cowboyedited by - cowboy on 21 july 2002 6:20:26.

bikerchic

For JanH:

*looking at your nickname* It wouldn't happen to be Bicycle Race, would it??

Bingo! Guess that one was too easy.....I like the whole lead into it with Fat Bottomed Girls, I wish I had a dollar for everytime I heard that song played in a biker-bar! Makes me wonder if Queen would still be around had Freddie not died. He had to have been a musical genuis, totally rocked! *sigh*

There can be only one!

NOT! How could anyone narrow down their favorite all time song, let alone style of music? I love everything from Clasical to Metal and variety is the spice of life!

bc

"Life is like a ten speed bike, we all have gears we never use." Charles Schultz

76

best song of all time

by Cowboy in

ok here's your chance...not neccesarily your favorite,but what you think is the best one....one vote apiece please... .

mine is he stopped loving her today by george jones...i love the sentiment,that he loved her til the day he died.

cowboyedited by - cowboy on 21 july 2002 6:20:26.

bikerchic

Oh Cowboy great topic, but atlast I cannot abide by the rules you see there is NO WAY I could ever pick just one song as my all time favorite......my favorite song happens to be whatever I'm listening to at the time. ;)

I do like country music, does that count?

I also like the words of Eric Burdon in the song Monterey....."you want to find the truth in life, don't pass music by, and you know I would not lie....."

and to JanH........Queen.....anything by them is awesome! Can you guess what my favorite song by them is?

That said one of my favorite songs of late is by a group called Cake from their Comfort Eagle CD:

"Short Skirt/Long Jacket"

I want a girl

With a mind like a diamond

I want a girl

Who knows what's best

I want a girl

With shoes that cut

And eyes that burn

Like cigarettes

I want a girl

With the right allocations

Who's fast and thorough

And sharp as a tack

She's playing with her jewelry

She's putting up her hair

She's touring the facility

And picking up slack

I want a girl with a short skirt and a lonnnng jacket......

I want a girl

Who gets up early

I want a girl

Who stays up late

I want a girl

With uninterupted prosperity

Who uses a machete

To cut through red tape

With fingernails

That shine like justice

And a voice that is dark

Like tinted glass

She is fast and thorough

And sharp as a tack

She's touring the facility

And picking up slack

I want a girl with a short skirt and a lonnnnng.... lonnng jacket

(Instrumental break)

I want a girl

With a smooth liquidation

I want a girl

With good dividends

And at the city bank

We will meet accidentally

We'll start to talk

When she borrows my pen

She wants a car

With a cupholder arm rest

She wants a car

That will get her there

She's changing her name

From Kitty to Karen

She's trading her MG

For a white Chrysler LeBaron

I want a girl with a short skirt and a lonnnnggggggggg jacket

Enjoy!

bc<<wears short skirts and long jackets :)

19

Official "Welcome" to new members

by Simon in

jw
friends

just wanted to say "welcome" to all the new people who have joined recently whether or not you've mustered up the courage to make your first post yet (it can be daunting).

glad you found us and decided to sign-up!.

i'm the tech guy behind the scenes so if you have any problems or questions then you can either email me (use the 'contact us' link at the bottom of each page) or post a question in the technical support area (unless your problem is that you can't post, lol) and someone will be able to help.. there are a lot of good people here and i'm sure you'll have fun as well as get some good answers.

bikerchic

Thank ewel Simon! Let me say the pleasure is all mine.

What a place this is.........and be assured all is well in "Chat" with the "Newbies" now that onacruse is the "Appointed Chat Monitor" and I have been dubbed the "Vice Presy" we intend to make sure no one gets their shorts in a twist......er I mean their feelings hurt! ;)

You guys rock!

cb

19

Was Jesus a.........????

by SpiceItUp in

jw
friends

there were 3 good arguments that jesus was black.

1. he called everyone "brother".

2. he liked gospel.

bikerchic

HA! Too funny Spice!

I'll take the Itallian Jesus:

1. He can talk to my body with those hands

2. Wine goes good with everything

3. Oil, pour it on.......and use those hands too baybee!

bc<<always a sucker for those latin lovers

28

ARMAGGEDON has arrived !!

by refiners fire in

jw
friends

how often does that thought cross your mind?.

it played on mine yesterday.

ive got a very expansive view across the melbourne flatlands and yesterday i looked out the back window and saw this dark grey storm wall coming in with rain so heavy that it was like a solid sheet of grey, swallowing the land.

bikerchic

We used to have Armagedon drills when I was a little kid. My Mom would tell us the police were coming to our door and we had to hide, first hide our Bibles then ourselves. I always hid under my bed and put my bible on the slats above me under the box spring mattress. I remember being scared to death! I never did that stuff to my kids, never even talked about when the big "A" comes, it scared me too much as a kid, I fugured they got scared enough going to meetings and hearing talks.

I do remember when I was pregnant I used to be scared about "woe to the pregnant woman", and often at times when the weather was freaky too.

Now that I've left, I can honestly say the only time I even had a near thought about the big "A" was 9-11, it worried me a lot and I came here and listening to all that was said here really calmed me down, thanks guys.

bc

25

How can I make them leave me alone?

by 67mustang in

jw
friends

does anybody know the best way to get jw's off my back.

i live in a small community and i can't just yell at them.

i am getting rather angry and it may come to that however.

bikerchic

Put a flag on your front porch and a note under your doorbell saying: "Ring bell only if you will salute my flag."

Or: Try a note taped to the door that looks rather legal and say NO PEDLERS, AGENTS OR JW'S

Or: Next time answer the door naked, tell them you are looking for Jesus will they please come in and help you find him.......

Or: You could always just tell them to F***-OFF, let them know you are absolutely NOT INTERESTED!! Sometimes honesty is the best policy!

bc

"Life is like a ten speed bike, we all have gears we never use." Charles Schultz

17

So What Was A Cause For Stumbling For You, Then?

by Englishman in

jw
friends

i recall vividly my teenage years when i was the eldest son of a colourful po.

until you have spent several days residing at the home of the po of a large congregation, you can have no idea what sagas and dramas are played out day after day by the publishers in many congregations.. publishers, ms's, elders, they all want the ear of the po.

in effect, many publishers become totally unable to make even the smallest decision without first of all contacting the po.

bikerchic

Ha! Good topic, I prefer to call it ENLIGHTENMENT......(my story....)

Enlightenment #1: Group of sisters meet for self-help in overcomming disfunctional behaviors seeing that a lot of us had common problems in our lives steming from disfunctional upbringing. The Elders (some of the sisters were married to Elders) decided that it wasn't right, wrote Society about it, some of them (Elder's husbands) forbid wives to go......they snuck, it was important we were learning about ourselves! Elder's continued to try to suppress the "group", letter's, phone calls, backroom meetings continued.......we persisted! Finally the Borg decided that we had to meet certain criteria, (thinking we couldn't do it and it would put a stop to it) we met the criteria kept our group going for years, the Borg even sucummed and printed an article in the Awake! based on our "group". LOL

Enlightenment #2: An Elder visit to my family where upon it was "rumored" my daughter was seen at high school hand in hand with a "worldly boy" SHOCKING indeed! My daughter didn't even go to meetings, not a publisher or anything mind you and the brothers didn't seem concerned about her spirituality anyway I knew about the so-called boyfriend and they had already quit "holding-hands", sheese get a life bros! I told one of the Elders there since he had girls approching their teen years to calm down, learn to listen to his children without such severe judgements, these "crushes" come and go like the changing tides in the teen years. He was pretty upset at me, thought I wasn't a very submissive christian....d'oh! BTW this Elder's girls, neither one are in the "truth" and quit long before he did.....it's been "rumored" that he is a crack-head now, gosh I didn't mean get that life bros!

Enlightenment #3: My experience with my then husband and his drinking, shirking family responsibility I though maybe a visit with the Elder's would help our family, or rather help him see the errors of his drinking. Wrong, lesson learned, never talk to Elder's who can out drink you under any circumstances and think they will be of any help.

Dialog of meeting; ELDER: What do you think is your problem Bros with drinking? HUBBY: It's that I may have a couple of beers at the shop (all the bros stop by the Elder-owned shop after work for encouragement) before coming home, it's a meeting night, by the time I get home I'm relaxed and just don't have the energy to get ready and go to the meeting, or study, or conduct family study, ect....ELDER: Well here is what I suggest, that you don't go to the shop on meeting nights, but instead go directly home don't drink any alcohol and then you will have a better mindset and energy to attend the meetings. ME: Let me ask you this Brothers, if his problem was lets say smoking pot, snorting coke, injecting herion or you name the addiction.....would your advise be the same, JUST DON'T DO IT ON MEETING NIGHTS? ELDERS: (almost in unison) No, those are illegal drugs, alcohol isn't illegal! This is a true experience..........I left the room, in a daze! BTW I left the hubby too, but he still has his bottle to keep him warm and the respect of the elders!

Enlightenment #4: The crap I went through when I took my errant husband back after an affair with one of the elder's wives, learning he wasn't her only victim, err, sorry conquest, how they pittied her due to her circumstances, seems she didn't understand what "flirting" meant, and meant, and meant....(get a clue!) I found out it's good to have husbands in high places, you can get away with almost anything! When I realized the whole "commitee" was handled wrong and tried to get one of the involved elders to stand up and do something his response was...."I'm only one man, I can't go against the body." Even though he knew it was wrong, he knew it needed to be corrected, he was as he said just too weak to stand up to the whole body of elders.

Of course all the situations mentioned were much more involved that stated, but the time it took to deal, sort and figure out was very enlightening to me to say the least. I recieved a great education in who exactly is behind the elder arrangement and more importantly "who" isn't! That was about it for me, it took a couple of years of inactivity for me to finally leave it all behind. I want to thank the elders for making my leaving the borg possible, for stumbling me, or rather enlightening me so well. Sometimes the job you do isn't the job you set out to do..........

bc

"Life is like a ten speed bike, we all have gears we never use." Charles Schultz

35

Doctor Visit Today

by Amazing in

jw
friends

well folks: i had my first follow-up visit, and things are not as good as i was hoping.

essentially, using diet and exercise to try and reverse my clogged arteries is okay for 15 areas which are 50% or less clogged, by 2 of the points are 80% occluded ... and must be treated in a matter of months, or i face death inside a year ... so, i have some time, but not as i hoped.

the two bad occlusions art each at the intersections of main branches ... and either of them would likely kill me if they close up.. the doctor was impressed with my diet changes, lifestyle adjustments, and weight loss and level of recovery ... but the recovery is limited, in that i still have some strong angina with mild exercise, strongly suggesting my heart does not get enough blood when i exercise, and then when i eat a large meal, the stomach uses enough blood flow, that the heart gets starved and i go into serious angina ... soooo ... i am ordered to limit exercise and eat 6 to 8 tiny meals a day ... and i am even getting a handicap sign for my car ... yikes!

bikerchic

(((((((((Amazing)))))))))

Take care of yourself man, as you can see a lot of people want you around for a long time, including me! I know we are all selfish *&^%$#@!s, but seriously get well, do whatever it takes but just do it!

bc

"Life is like a ten speed bike, we all have gears we never use." Charles Schultz