Hello and welcome to the forum mrgij01. I'll call you mr g from now on if you don't mind.
I hope you find this an interesting and informative corner of the web.
I was an active witness when I married and have slowly become inactive over the last 3 years. Like many others here I've had various levels of responsiblity and have served at the world headquarters (bethel).
Since it seems that your wife doesn't have the answers to many of your questions I suggest you ask and research here first. When helping someone learn to think for themselves (and believe it or not that is what you'll be doing) the best first position is knowing the answers they should be providing you. You need to become familiar with what occurs at the meetings and what is being taught there. Remembering that individual witnesses are good loving people (most of the time) who are being mislead by others. Keeping that in mind helps me not get angry with individual witnesses who are merely doing what they've been taught it right. The key is to unteach them.
Good luck to you. I'm glad that you and your wife have a good relationship. You'll need to keep that strong, because that is your base or foundation for whatever may come next.