adelmaal

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Posts by adelmaal

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  58

  My New Boyfriend!!!

  by HadEnuf in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  yup...here's my new boyfriend.

  (hubby doesn't know it yet...heck...the new boyfriend doesn't even know it yet).

  don't we make a cute couple?

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  adelmaal

  www.tinypic.com is an easy way to host a picture so you can paste it here.
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  21

  Do you think that the Governing Body will pick JW women when men die off?

  by booker-t in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know this might seem like a big laughable joke, but i was wondering what will happen when all of the gb members die off or get too old to continue as gb members?

  will they start to pick jw women who claim to be of the annoited and or old enough to be alive during 1935?

  evidently the chosen will get too old to carry on and there will be "new light" to say that young jw can be of the annointed and gb.

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  adelmaal

  There will be NEW LIGHT regarding the 144,000, the generation and the Governing Body before that happens. The phrase "Cold Day In Hell" comes to mind here...

  They don't get that the one with the pooty has the power - LOL.
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  18

  hello world (deconversion story)

  by tetrapod.sapien in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  here is my story as originally posted on iidb.org.

  it is only about a week old, but i have been lurking here for months.

  it was written for non ex-jw's, ergo the explainations as to terminology.

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  adelmaal

  Welcome!

  If you click on the title of any of your threads you should get a pop-up menu allowing you to edit the post. Once in edit mode you can enlarge the font, change colors, add quote boxes, etc.

  It was tough to stay in line with the big paragraph but I managed. Very interesting experience you had. I hope you enjoy your journey and I am glad you have found the will to think for yourself. I am sorry you had to lose your family and friends in the process.

  You will find the whole gammut of individuals on this site from athiest, agnostic, mormon, wiccan, christian (that would be me; though i do bounce all over the map when it comes to forming some kind of a belief system (a work in progress)), etc. It's a great discussion board. Very welcoming and friendly.

  Here's to your journey . Again, welcome!
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  44

  You know when you have been on the forum to long when,,,

  by kls in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  you are talking to youre dub mate and you start telling them a story that you heard on the forum and they ask where you heard the story from.

  of course the forum pops in your head and you have to think real quick of another source.

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  adelmaal

  yep... i always start with, "i was talking to someone today about..." he usually doesn't question it.
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  14

  I'm searching for answers....

  by nedryerson in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i have been studying your faith and i understand that you believe in the bible?

  1. in revelation 1:8, it says, ?

  ?i am the alpha and the omega,?

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  adelmaal

  Welcome to the forum! Stick around. You will see many different topics here with the whole gammut of opinions.

  A true Jehovah's Witness would be confused by your question and would run around in circles attempting to answer it in such a way that God and Jesus are not one and the same. I am guessing you realize that JWs don't believe in the Trinity doctrine and you are trying to draw them out by having them explain these scriputures to you.

  Are you truly confused by these scriptures? Are you truly questioning whether or not the Trinity (meaning God and Jesus are one and the same) is a truthful doctrine? Or are you trying to debate it with a JW?

  Personally, I believe God is the Alpha and the Omega the beginning and the end because he always existed. I believe Jesus is the First and the Last because he was God's first creation and he will always exist. Just my opinion. Not speaking as a JW since I left that religion quite some time ago.

  If you have a legitimate question and are searching for an answer then by all means ask away. If your motivation is to trick a JW into debating doctrines with you then you are in the wrong place. Unless, of course, you want to strike up a conversation with Schizm. He'll debate with you until the cows come home.
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  23

  Discipline for Lying -- Opinions Please

  by adelmaal in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  our daughter is 10 and she is in 4th grade.

  she has been having a tough time this year with schoolwork and she has started early puberty (boobs, acne, pubic hair, crushes on boys, etc.).

  recently, we have been having problems with her lying to us and making up stories/excuses.

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  adelmaal

  I thoroughly understand cancelling your daughter's birthday party for lying about a whole stack of stuff, but I'd put it this way: "Since you skipped detention, you're going to have detention at home." Then find her some useful stuff to do related to the schoolwork trouble she's having.

  Great suggestion! I love creative parenting.
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  23

  Discipline for Lying -- Opinions Please

  by adelmaal in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  our daughter is 10 and she is in 4th grade.

  she has been having a tough time this year with schoolwork and she has started early puberty (boobs, acne, pubic hair, crushes on boys, etc.).

  recently, we have been having problems with her lying to us and making up stories/excuses.

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  adelmaal

  So-called "laziness" is often, but not always, rooted in very subtle learning disorders that are hard to diagnose. You might brainstorm with her about laziness why schoolwork is so hard. Maybe she just can't focus on some things and the task just won't hold still so she can get a grip on it.

  I have thought about her possibly having some kind of learning disability causing her to have trouble staying focused. Her mind does tend to wander allot. Hopefully, we can get her diagnosed if this is the case.

  Maybe my ex (her dad) has that same learning disability because you have to light a fire cracker under his butt to get him to do anything that takes a bit of effort . I always had a hard time getting homework done because it bored me so. I still aced my tests though and skated through with As and Bs. Maybe my daughter got the worst from both of us .
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  23

  Discipline for Lying -- Opinions Please

  by adelmaal in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  our daughter is 10 and she is in 4th grade.

  she has been having a tough time this year with schoolwork and she has started early puberty (boobs, acne, pubic hair, crushes on boys, etc.).

  recently, we have been having problems with her lying to us and making up stories/excuses.

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  adelmaal

  I really thought I had seen too many American movies before I joined this board - but I guess it's really true, you guys see counselors over all kinds of things, seemingly at all ages, kinda strange.

  i saw a therapist myself when i went through my divorce, disfellowshipping and exiting of "the troof". it helped me allot to have someone impartial to speak to about what was going on and she recommended some great self-help books. she was a good listener and really helped me to be able to get through a tough time in my life without beating myself up too much.

  no stygma about therapists here. i personally only went for a period of a few months and that's the only time i've ever seen a counselor. my children have not been to one yet but i am at the point with my daughter where i am not afraid to ask for help from a professional who counsels children on a regular basis.

  don't know if it's a difference in culture or not? we usually do have employee assistance plans her in the states which provide counseling to those who find a need be it for alcoholism, abuse, divorce, depression, etc.

  i'll let you know if it helps with my daughter. the therapists i have been speaking to are MFTs (marriage family therapists) so i am hoping the one we see will help us to better be able to work with our daughter to get to the heart of what is really going on and work on it with her.
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  23

  Discipline for Lying -- Opinions Please

  by adelmaal in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  our daughter is 10 and she is in 4th grade.

  she has been having a tough time this year with schoolwork and she has started early puberty (boobs, acne, pubic hair, crushes on boys, etc.).

  recently, we have been having problems with her lying to us and making up stories/excuses.

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  adelmaal

  It seems to me you made too many punishments for not a serious lie...........and yes, I do see degrees of lying.

  i do agree that she was definitely feeling that the green ink pen all over her paper meant she did a bad job and was going to disappoint us. in the past we have told her that this teacher is way to critical and she should not worry so much about all the ink on her work. that's why it's surprising she even lied at all because she knows we think this particular teacher is to much a perfectionist.

  in my mind if she does not see that little lies eventually lead to big lies and that lying can eventually get her and others into serious trouble then she will see no need not to lie to cover things over. right now it's lying about a school paper and later on it could be lying about doing drugs. i agree that there are degrees of lying but at what point do you crack down on it?

  maybe i should backtrack. here's what happened the time she lost out on her birthday party.

  open book quiz at school. she didn't bother to look up the answers to the questions (she knows how to read but sometimes does have issues with grasping the concept behind what she reads). teacher had them each grade their own papers. my daughter got pretty much every answer wrong because she just wrote whatever came to mind (she said she was just being lazy and didn't feel like looking up all the answers). teacher had the children grade their own tests then went around the room and asked for the scores from each child. my daughter said, "99%". teacher called her up to the front knowing it was not true and gave her a detention for lying/cheating on her quiz. teacher sent home a note regarding detention, which my daughter did not show anyone. my daughter did not go to detention. teacher called home. to everyone involved this was not a minor issue. my daughter needed to know that it is not ok to cheat and lie to her teacher and then not be honest about her detention.

  while i can understand why she did what she did that still does not make it ok. i can see that getting to the heart of the matter and finding out why she is behaving this way is important and at the same time i also believe in consequences for our actions.

  i'm not sure taking away her overnight this weekend with her friends was that extreme. she is still going to her all day cheerleading event this saturday and it was already 8:00p by the time we sent her to her room with no tv, etc. she read a book or two and went to bed.

  i do want her to learn something from this though and that is why i was thinking that if she wrote a paper talking about honesty and how important it is that we trust one another it might help her to see why it hurts us when she lies.

  i think the therapist suggestion was a great one though because she is definitely going through a host of things this year between being in two different households, starting puberty, stressing about schoolwork and friends, etc.
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  23

  Discipline for Lying -- Opinions Please

  by adelmaal in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  our daughter is 10 and she is in 4th grade.

  she has been having a tough time this year with schoolwork and she has started early puberty (boobs, acne, pubic hair, crushes on boys, etc.).

  recently, we have been having problems with her lying to us and making up stories/excuses.

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  adelmaal

  i have been on the phone trying to find a counselor who deals with children today. i have received some referrals and i have left some messages. i would my daughter to be able to talk to someone about what is going on and how she is feeling so we can better help her out with the drama she's been experiencing this year.

  it just does not seem she should be already going through the stage where she gets caught cheating, half-asses her school work, lies about detention, etc. she's only 10 years old for pete's sake!

  it just makes it that much harder that she lives in two households and we cannot control what goes on when she is with her dad and all his jw relatives. i'm sure the expectations are high over there. i was not raised in "the troof". i started studying as a teenager so i have a hard time relating to what it must be like to have that kind of pressure. not to mention the fact that they do not instill a great attitude when it comes to school.

  thanks for all your advice