EvilForce

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Posts by EvilForce

• 
  103

  How many of you are childfree by choice?

  by rebel8 in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  by that, i mean you do not want to have children.. i have been told since birth it would not be safe for me to have children, so i never even considered it.

  i never went through a grieving period because the concept of having babies was not something i once had and lost.

  i always envisioned myself as a happy career woman.. i recently married and am still sure i don't want children.

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  EvilForce

  Mabye the British had it right all along. If you are going to have the little vermin....hire a nanny.
• 
  103

  How many of you are childfree by choice?

  by rebel8 in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  by that, i mean you do not want to have children.. i have been told since birth it would not be safe for me to have children, so i never even considered it.

  i never went through a grieving period because the concept of having babies was not something i once had and lost.

  i always envisioned myself as a happy career woman.. i recently married and am still sure i don't want children.

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  EvilForce

  Hmmm....this thread is like a car accident....just can't turn my head away...
  
  Ok...to the wrath of the board, and to swim over to Crumpet's side of the abyss. Children are really like puppies. They poop and pee everywhere. They destroy Italian leather furniture. Bring home countless illnesses from school to get everyone at home sick. Require unlimited attention. And really just become unpleasant adults.
  
  It's not like it's only one small decsion. Ok, let's squeeze out a brat..... Nope! First it's the kid. Then it's picking out the little snot nosed 6 lb. pink ball of grossness name. Of course there are like 6 "in" names for boys and girls at any given time. So you show up at the first day of kindergarten and there are 4 of each in the class. I mean really folks, instead of a Dillion or an Ethan or Hannah...how about just plain Hethen, or Pukeball, or Cowlick. At least you can keep them straight.
  
  After having the lil "darling", next you need to pick out which car seat you need to buy. This is like shopping for a LazyBoy recliner for the car. The tacky fabrics and cheapness of the molded plastic never goes well with the leather upolstery. You think they'd have a nice Natuzzi leather selection or a chenille or something...but nooooo it's imitation navy velvet with stars and polka dots on them. UGH! When you start talking about how fabrics hide stains well, you know you've died and gone to baby hell.
  
  Of course this assume you've kept your old car. Most newborn's parents launch themselves into an orgasm of idoicy and start talking about "responsibilty". So they trade in the BMW 325 two door for a 8 door Dodge Caravan that seats 12 with auto-opening side doors and rear doors. This feature is needed when ma or pa are loaded down with the baby, 72 lb. diaper bag filled with enough rations to keep a small army supplied, and superflous other baby crap. So instead of driving the "fornicatorium" on wheels they trade it in for the "lesbian bed death" of vehicles.
  
  Where do we shop for this new parcel? Yup you got Pottery Barn Kids, Gap Kids, and Ikea for Noobs. So you load up the family and drive off into vast suburbia to go to "the mall". UGH! Your wife finds this "cute" outfit for the indigent you call "Junior". Of course this outfit costs $ 62 for which "lil Precious" is going to wear exactly two times before out growing. And of course peeing it 4 times and barfing on it once. This garmet of course was made in China by children no older than the one you are buying it for and paid their $ .18 a day labor wage. As you bring your "haul" out to said mini-van you chuckle to yourself that it was a "wise" purchase. I mean how else could you fit all the non-assmbled, particle board, cheap ass Ikea furniture in your car otherwise?
  
  As you drive back to your flat in the city you see a great suburban home for your new family "addition". You and wifey decide there and then that you no longer want to live in the city, but would rather live in the vast waste land of suburbia. Who wants great food and live entertainment when you can have strip malls, chain resturant food, and white picket fences? After all, you need more room for all the accumulating cheap ass furniture you just bought. Besides, you want "lil Einstein" to go to the best schools. Of course you don't realize at the time that the 3 bedroom, garage to the front, no sidewalked - cul de sac'd neighborhood has about as much architechtural interest as a "quick build Kingdumb Hall". You'll figure this out the first time you come home from the pub after 3 beers and can't figure out which is your house since they all look alike and are the same color and layout.
  
  Sometime soon after moving to the "burbs" parents somehow become deaf to children. The little bastard will be screaming and yelling at the grocery store, yet they are some how impervious to their "fingernails on a blackboard" child's scream. But somehow if a random stranger is overhead talking about a new "child rearing technique" those parents can hear from 14 aisles over?!? I don't get it.
  
  Soon your life degrades into fulll-time idolotry. You worship at the altar of "the child". All parties with your friends become "orgies of child worship". You can't carry on conversation without bringing up the latest crackpot theories on how to make Little Jacob / Emma a well adjusted little person. You compare notes with other parents. This is really competition. You need to prove how much better of a parent you are than those crazy Henderson's across the cul de sac. You brag how you have your kid's schedule of activities cross referenced, time stamped, and color coded in an Excel spreadsheet on the refrigerator. You become a white bread Taxi driver for these little ingrates. Andrew has soccer practice at 3:30. Jenna has ballet at 3:45. Christopher has karate at 4:00. Madison has piano lessons at 4:15. You pat yourself on the back because you know every short cut between point A, B, and C.
  
  After running yourself ragged like an amped up retard on Skittles all day you come home to cook a nice meal. Gone are the days of good food. It's now tater tots, hot dogs, and mac and cheese. Ohhhhh the culinary delights of motherhood / fatherhood. After chasing after the children to do their homework, not watch TV, and bathe the little puke monsters you collapse into bed. Nope! No sex! That's for single folks!
  
  So what part of children are really that fun may I ask ?!?!
  
  
  EvilForce - of the Did I Just Say All That Outloud Class?
• 
  67

  What do you feel when you see groups of Jehovah's Witnesses on the street?

  by nicolaou in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  regret, anger frustration?

  how about sadness, sorrow, sympathy, understanding, even yearning!.

  it can be quite confusing at times.

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  EvilForce

  GBL....they looked petrified because you were honking and swerving at them you crazy "poztate" !!!
  
  1 word comes to mind when I see a group of Dub's....
  
  Lemmings
• 
  19

  For those who think they know everything

  by free2beme in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  for those of you who just thought you knew everything, here's a refresher course................ .

  the liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for blood plasma.. .

  no piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times.. .

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  EvilForce

  A jiffy is a proper unit of time for 1/100th of a second.
  
  Elizabeth the First suffered from anthophobia ( a fear of flowers - in her case roses)
  
  Names for Atlantic hurricanes can only be French, English, or Spanish.
  
  A 'quidnunc' is a person who is eager to know the latest news & gossip.
  
  The average woman says 3 times more words per day than the average man.
  
  The word 'dude" is the name for an infected elephant butt hair.
  
  A spermologer collects trivia.
  
  Until 1969 it was illegal to speak English in Illinois because the official language was American.
  
  Dr. Seuss wrote "Green Eggs and Ham" after his editor dared him to write a book using fewer than 50 different words.
  
  A pied-billed grebe is called a peebeegeebee by birdwatchers.
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  47

  Dub at work said that the Knowledge book was too difficult for new ones

  by acsot in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  to understand so that's why the wts published the new book being released at this year's district conventions.. the new book gets "straight to the point".

  according to her "and many others", the knowledge book was too difficult for those just beginning a bible study.

  i said, "you're kidding!

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  EvilForce

  Voyager...thanks for posting that quote....I'm going to go barf now!
  
  U/D - I rap, I sing, I dance....ought to see me drunk at Karoke....NOT. LOL
  
  
  
  
• 
  47

  Dub at work said that the Knowledge book was too difficult for new ones

  by acsot in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  to understand so that's why the wts published the new book being released at this year's district conventions.. the new book gets "straight to the point".

  according to her "and many others", the knowledge book was too difficult for those just beginning a bible study.

  i said, "you're kidding!

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  EvilForce

  Yeah it was as deep as a Dr. Suess book.
  
  One book, red book, green book, two.
  Never tease a weasel no never once or twice, no never tease a weasel, no it's not very nice.
  No sir I do not like green eggs and ham.
  
  Paradise erf, no worldly turf, by God no smurfs, this is what the GB purps
• 
  50

  Bi-Sexual

  by misguided in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i guess my new-found freedom of personal expression is working its way down to my kids.. i came home from a crazy day at work, ate my dinner, was loading the dishwasher, when my 13-year-old son says, .

  "mom, i have something to tell you - i'm bisexual...i've been that way for a year now.

  i still can't help but have my old jw brain at work, thinking this is not okay - kind of like, i'm an apostate with a bisexual son...what will my family say?!

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  EvilForce

  U/D...points well taken, however in light that she asked about her son's sexuality and if he had too much female influence which may have caused this.
  
  I just wanted to clarify that this isn't the reason for his sexuality and if for some reason she had a man around the house somehow the boy would have turned out differently.
  
  EvilForce of the - MUST GET COFFEE...CAN"T FORM A SENTANCE THIS MORNING class.
• 
  50

  Bi-Sexual

  by misguided in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i guess my new-found freedom of personal expression is working its way down to my kids.. i came home from a crazy day at work, ate my dinner, was loading the dishwasher, when my 13-year-old son says, .

  "mom, i have something to tell you - i'm bisexual...i've been that way for a year now.

  i still can't help but have my old jw brain at work, thinking this is not okay - kind of like, i'm an apostate with a bisexual son...what will my family say?!

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  EvilForce

  U/D sorry but having a male influence in the boy's life DOES NOT dictate sexuality!
  
  If you want him to have male influence fine, but it's not about his sexuality. You will just have a bisexual son that watches footie on TV.
• 
  3

  WAR IS NOT FUN

  by chrissy in

  1. social
  2. humour

  as i was reading the seattle stranger tonight, i came across a hilarious submission under the "i, anonymous", a sort of rant and rave submission column.

  i thought someone else, a fellow gal perhaps, might get a chuckle.... war is not fun.

  to the "freedom-lovin'" douchebag who left the "critique" of my bumper stickers on my car: you question how a "veteran" can be against war.

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  EvilForce

  LOL
  
  Made my night!
• 
  138

  The verdict is in! Michael Jackson is . . . . . . . . NOT GUILTY!

  by nicolaou in

  1. social
  2. current

  the full list of charges faced by michael jackson at his child abuse trial.

  count 1: conspiracy to commit child abduction, false imprisonment and extortion between 1 february and 31 march 2003. not guilty.

  count 2: lewd act upon a child between 20 february and 12 march 2003. not guilty.

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  EvilForce

  Yup since the American Justice system is a joke .....
  
  I say we form a JC of three elders and see what they decide.... ;)